JanieinMadison

Ok Cupid and My Saturday Night

2012-02-13T18:29:00.007-06:00

I saw that a Valentine's Day 5K was taking place last Saturday, so I decided that I would try to break a PR. Although I have never been much into racing, with all of this running, it just makes sense to race here and there. I saw you could race as a couple, so I knew I had the advantage [and very good chance] of winning. Of all the wonderful winter days we have had as of late, Friday afternoon, it actually looked like winter. And it snowed.

Fearful of icy sidewalks, I was sort of worried about how I would race in that weather. And when we woke up on Saturday, it was all of about zero degrees. Zero is not exactly good racing weather. Your muscles are tight and you just can't go that hard.

But enough people showed up for the race and it was about minus five degrees with the windchill and off we went. And I was so sure I could do a 7:07 mile, but something happens to me now that I actually care about racing. When the race starts, and you're surrounded by all of these people and each female you glance at is nothing more than competition, I think to myself, "I hate races. I'll just pretend I am doing my usual morning run." - something I need to work on.

And so, I enjoyed it more or less, not gonna lie. I think we came in third but the results are not up yet. And we weren't chipped. But again, definitely could have done better, but it was super cold and when "Team Win-Cox" [combo of our last names] was done, we made a lot of friends and decided to go out and do some afternoon drinking. For me, it meant a beer with lunch.

And then we went on to Genna's, where my sister met my brother-in-law. And we had our first date. Then we came home so I could feed the dog. And discovered that Whitney Houston had died. Reminiscent of this past summer when I was at the Circus World Museum.

Next, we went to his runner friend's house where we were served old fashioneds because this is Wisconsin and that is what everyone drinks here. Then we went to another party where we didn't really know what/who/when/why the party was going on, but the host made really good falafel [this word is not in my blog's spellcheck, by the way] and everyone looked like a grad student with glasses on. I continously asked "Who are these people?" and "What is this party?" The table was filled with lots of Middle Eastern/tasty food that everyone continuously munched on, pouring anonymously labeled sauces over their food vehicle.

Well, then, two doors down, we decided to stop at one more party. One of our brand-new- having-just-met-him-this-morning-at-the-race-friends had invited us to. It was his house, but guess what? He was not there. And so in we walked, not knowing anyone [can you believe it? I walked all over the house and didn't know one person!]So we introduced ourselves to the birthday boy, helped ourselves to some more noshing and such.

Then, we moved on to Plan B. "Long time, no see!" the muscled bartender said to me. It's more of a summer place, I suppose. And we danced away until twenty to two A.M.

Now let me stop here. Because while we were there, I had this awesome thought in my head. When my mom was my age, she was pregnant with me. And here I am - no children, I can sleep in tomorrow and I have all of this energy and it's almost two in the morning. How great is that? How great is this?

And when I texted my friend the next morning who invited me to have brunch at 11 AM, I passed, using the "I have to spend some more time with my bed" excuse. Because I was tired and my bed needed me. Sorry if you're jealous.

So, back to the end of the night. We walk home. It's below zero. It's over one mile. And it's almost two A.M. And I decide we need to stop in Natt Spil to take a minute to warm up. And in we walk and there it is. It's serendipity. F. Stokes is in the bar, having just finished a show on campus. And he remembered us! And hopefully, that video will make us both famous so we can retire in a few months. My lawyer is calling his [who happened to be there].

Janie Went Way Up North

2012-01-29T17:24:00.005-06:00

Everyone in Wisconsin goes "up North" at some point. You see, apart from Madison, Wisconsinites are really big into fishing, hunting, snow mobiling and the Green Bay Packers - you know all the things you can picture me doing regularly. [Sarcasm]

Although I didn't describe my tailgating experience at the December Packer game at Lambeau, I did it. I went to a game. And the scene around Lambeau is really something.

So when I was invited to go way up North for some ice fishing in a shanty, I jumped at the chance. [Ok - maybe I didn't jump at the chance. Since I just told you that I am fairly certain that I have Raynaud's]. But I am willing to try anything. Like when my boyfriend asked me to go watch the girls at the Roller Derby a few weeks ago and I walked around and recruited a bunch of people to sign this petition for Planned Parenthood.

But me? In a shanty all day on the ice?! Of course. So, after loading up the car with my tiny bag and my large golden retriever, we were headed "Up North." Not sure really where, but I know it's just what Wisconsin people do.

As we drove out onto the ice, the wind was blowing hard. We got the shantys up quickly and some of the people we were with started drilling holes in the ice right away. After settling into the shanty and eating "beer dip" ["What is this? Is it vegetarian?", asked the little girl from Cleveland, Ohio], we sat on chairs and drank beers before noon. Welcome to Wisconsin!

I was also the only one who didn't say "Sewwww" instead of "so" and "Noooooow" instead of "no." I know that I am the one with the accent, though.

After a while, it was time to break the seal. [Oh - did I mention we were ice fishing, too? Oops]. One of the gals didn't want to use nature's restroom, so a few of us girls piled into a car and went to the town bar. Now, the town bar was full at 2:20 PM. And let me have you know that everyone turned and looked at us when we came in. They wanted to see if they knew who we were. Maybe it was their cousin's girlfriend or something - I don't know. My PBR in a glass was $.75! Yes - that is correct! That is seventy-five cents, ladies and gentleman! After a few rounds [roughly costing $5 for four women/round,] we went back to the shanty.

My boyfriend was very, very busy on the ice. He was building a "Wizard Stick" and speaking with a strange accent. None of us had heard of this before but his high school pal was easily convinced to make one as well. Oh - yeah - I forgot. We were fishing, too.

It was really cold and the sun was setting so we all packed up and went back to the cabin. Being a vegetarian from Cleveland, Ohio - I was already full from cheese curds, chips and garbage that my stomach is still giving me problems for a day later.

It was such a fun time and I look forward to doing it again next year. I can't say I caught anything, but I wasn't planning on it. Let's just say I am no natural when it comes to fishing. What's the point when you throw them back, anyways?

Winter is Back

2012-01-19T16:28:00.003-06:00

Winter finally arrived in Madison, Wisconsin. Shockingly, it took long enough. If you look at the calendar of seasons, I believe winter started on December 21st [so not quite one month ago from today] and it ends on March 20th. Yes, winter hasn’t even been official for one month. Yet, we typically have a lot of snow by now.

For someone who is scared of running in the snow, I was still running in shorts and outdoors in this winter. Mind you, it was pitch black out.

I was itching for some snow to go cross country skiing. Other than that, I wasn’t dying for the snow this year. I mean, I love to get snowed in. And I love watching the snow out my window while having a glass [or several] of red wine [pinot grigio is my “warm season beverage.”]

I started taking the bus about a year ago and I love it. I never liked public transportation before. Everything is better in Madison, Wisconsin. Here, you get on the bus and it’s full of normal people. [And some typical Madison sketchy people.] My route goes through the University. Non state-employees, please don’t start complaining, but it’s free for me. And I realized the other day that since I have moved to Madison, Wisconsin, I have put less than 500 miles a month on my car. [Even moreso, now that I take the bus] which results in rare trips to the gas station. The last 3,000 mile check-up I had was in July and I am still not due for my next one.

So, I was worried about waiting for the bus because it was going to be “SO COLD” in these Wisconsin winters. However, as you may know by now, I run in the morning and it takes me a long time to cool down so this is not an issue.

Although undiagnosed, I am sure I have Raynaud's. My hands go numb less than five minutes after going outside. I have learned to power walk [no offense but faster than some people jog] the majority of the time and wear mittens [and have hand warmers for excessive outdoor activity].

Here is how you can enjoy this cold weather:
Walk fast and wear layers. A nice and heavy windbreaker with mittens and several pants are a must.

For example, today I took the bus to work and it was a high of 7. When I went to the bus this morning, it was 4 degrees. I had just worked out, so I was still warm. I wore my coat, work pants with leggings under, a sweater with a tee shirt and winter boots. Upon my walk home from the bus, I took the dog for her daily walk around the square. This walk is .92 miles. I decided to add a little to it. Here is why. The more I walked and walked faster, the warmer I would get. So when I returned home, I was warm through the middle.

All you need to do to enjoy the cold weather is embrace it! When I am cold, I layer up and literally go out into it. Once I get my heartrate up, I am toasty.

Embrace the cold weather. Don't stay away from it. That will just make you hate it. And then you may want to quit complaining and move to Florida.

Still Unmotivated?

2012-01-05T12:52:00.003-06:00

So I recently blogged about my life with running and nobody commented. I told you my weight. I told you how easy it is to get there. My dad told me [via phone] that he ran one summer and hit the “runner’s high.” My sister texted me that I should do some Central Park run [maybe the one on New Year’s Eve?]

But I am going to break it down, now people. Has anyone read that post or read my posts on exercise been inspired to do anything about it?

I have always noticed that the first week of January, the workout room is way more packed than usual. By the third week, it’s back to all the regulars.

After I wrote the last posting, I managed to do my daily four miles at a 7:07 pace. I am hoping this will move me up in my age range in whatever race I do next – which will probably be the Shamrock Shuffle. This is because I am a wreck on the ice and would prefer not to race in it. The ice slows you down. I am thinking St.Patty’s Day should be warm enough. Besides, if you are into meteorology, Madison has had almost no snow this season. None. Notta. No cross country skiing for me. It’s the oddest thing.

I am going to try to help you if I can. Because I think it is so easy to wake up and hit the pavement, I am going to list problems that you may be having that can be actually cured by this thing I am doing [called running].

1) Are you able to turn off the water and save some energy when you shower? If you answered “No because I am too cold,” this is because you do not work out in the morning.
2) Are you freezing when you walk to the car/bus/train? If so, it’s because you do not work out in the morning.
3) Are you exhausted all of the time and feel the need for a nap? If you answered “yes,” it is because you do not exercise. [Or you are pregnant, are anemic, have sleep apnea or are depressed – many of which can be treated with exercise- except pregnancy.]
4) Are you down about your weight? It may be because you do not exercise.
5) Are you worried about not being there for your children? Workout.
6) Low self-esteem?

You get the picture. If I have motivated you, please feel free to comment. If you are wanting to workout, but can't, feel free to e-mail me. I am happy to help.

How I Started Running [and Loving it]

2011-12-23T18:05:00.000-06:00

When I was fourteen, my friend put on her running shoes and told me to go jogging with her. I had tried to run around a track at the local gym but wasn’t doing it right. When you run in gym class, you tend to sprint and that’s what I was doing. I would go one time around and think “no way can I do this!” Going jogging with my friend, I could easily keep up and we continued around the block a few times.

I had accompanied my dad to a number of Cleveland Revco Marathons when I was really young. [I wish I could say it was to watch him which would be way cool, but it was to sit with him in a slow-moving van that assisted with communications via ham radio.] Anyways, I was introduced to this long competitive challenge long ago.

When we got a treadmill after that jog at fourteen, I could run slowly. By the summer, I was doing three miles in thirty minutes which seemed fine with me. It wasn’t until the winter of 1996 that I went outside and went for a long run. And I just kept on going. I had no idea that I was capable of doing that.

I tried to get into running and had a little bit of a routine. By college, I was running about three days a week. That was first semester. Second semester, I failed miserably and came home after freshmen year at 144 pounds. That’s the biggest I have ever been. [I now weigh around 110 – have for almost ten years. And even though my ex boyfriend saw my weight on my license and made some obnoxiously rude comment, the last time I went to the doctor, I was 110. Thank you very much! Most people don’t believe me when I tell them I was heavy for a second. But I am really tiny. Not gonna lie. So it surprises some.]

The weight came off and by senior year of college, I was about 120 pounds and wore a size two. I moved to Boston and ran most mornings before work with Scout. This was more for Scout than me. She was only one and was home alone all day. I thought it was very important that she get the run before she was alone all day. By the spring of 2003, I was inspired to train for a marathon after watching the Boston Marathon on Patriots Day.

Let me tell you about the Boston Marathon. It is one of the ultimate marathons because unlike most marathons, you have to qualify for it [unless you do one of those “Team in Training” type of fundraisers.] For example, if I wanted to participate in it, I would have to run a previous marathon at about an 8.40 pace. [Dad – you would need to complete one at a 10.8 minute pace, so you should really consider it. Just saying]. So, I watched the marathon and said, “I can do this” and then I signed up for one and started training.

I chose the Columbus [Capital of Ohio] marathon because my sister lived there, the slogan was “fast, flat and fun” [that’s a total lie, by the way], and I knew it would be an easy drive for my parents to come and watch. The weather was supposed to be decent at that time of the year [October] and it gave me enough time to train. And train I did. With absolutely no support from anyone, including my place of employment, [who asked me if I was running a marathon both days because they wanted me to work on Saturday – “Um, hello?”]

I trained alone. In fact, for my final long run, I ended up posting an ad on craigslist to find people who would run with me because I didn’t want to run that entire distance alone [too boring]. I didn’t care about my time at all. I just wanted to do a marathon. I met two strangers and we did the run and never saw each other again. After that final run, I had sprained my foot and injured my knee and couldn’t put any weight on it. Three weeks out from the marathon, the doctor told me to lay off the running and I should be ok.

I flew to Columbus and did my very first [and perhaps only] marathon and I hated it. I hated the training and I hated that nobody from Boston seemed to understand it. But whatever. Different times. Different situations. My parents were there and they were proud and my favorite sister [just kidding!] was there for me. And I slept incredibly well that night. I forgot to put my chip in – oh well. I just wanted to complete a marathon.

After that awful experience, I didn’t like running. I ran one more small race in Boston that March. Last minute, three sisters asked me to run with them so we could form a team. And we actually came in third place and won some money.

I took up running again in 2005. I was then living back in my hometown in Cleveland, Ohio. And that is when I started running six days a week. I got fast. I liked it. And that’s when I began to wonder why more people do not do aerobic exercise. And that is when it began to baffle me.

I mostly ran at the gym but when the weather broke, I started running outside. Cars failed to go around me and I ended up giving that finger in the middle to a lot of large SUVs. I was also alone on the roads. I would try to run places – like to people’s houses, coffee shops, etc. But where I was living didn’t seem conducive to this. And I found it really annoying. I don’t like driving somewhere to go for a run. It seems sort of pointless.

I decided to do another race without caring about the time or training. I had raced in a few of those Komen races – but those don’t count. [At least not to me]. In 2008, I did a five miler in forty minutes. I didn’t train or anything. I mean, I ran almost thirty miles a week – I didn’t care if I won it. Then I realized I was improving. And I really liked it.

I had recently visited my sister and brother-in-law in Madison, Wisconsin. And all I could notice while visiting them was how many people I saw when I was out running. And how the city was laid out so well that there were running paths absolutely everywhere. And they were incredibly utilized. Running in Madison was way more fun than in Cleveland.

And this was one of the key reasons I moved. [Besides a few others]. So I moved to Madison right around the time I started this blog and got my route figured out. I changed it up a few times. I am down to one I have been doing for about two years. And I still really enjoy running alone because it is my time for introspection. It keeps me thin and feeling great.

And that one day in May of this year, when I was out running and saw signs for the Madison half and asked myself why I wasn’t doing it and went and signed up and ran it the next day without training for it under two hours –[ thank you very much] is completely credited to my obsession with running six days a week.

So when I met my current boyfriend [can you keep up?] we talked about running on our first date and I discovered that while I thought I was extremely regimented with my running, he is even moreso. And he is extremely competitive. So I started running faster.

I signed up for the Berbee Derby and wanted to break my PR. Now, for those of you who are into running, you know that the night before a race, you don’t sleep well. I have those dreams – you know the ones where when you get to the race and it already started? They are actually nightmares. So I slept horribly and when the race started, I didn’t feel it. I told myself, “F it and just do what you need to do.” I came in ninth in my age group which I was happy about at a 7.44 pace, but not at all breaking a PR. Boo Just not a great race for me. But there will be more.

I can now run a mile in under seven minutes and it just makes me feel more competitive. I enjoy a good, fast run and nothing compares to the fabulous feeling when you are done. I have absolutely no pain [joint problems, aches, etc] from running. I highly recommend it. Especially if you are trying to lose a little weight.

I had four other close girlfriends run in the Berbee Derby, along with my cousin’s boyfriend, my 69 year old uncle and my boyfriend [who came in fifth out of 1,543 runners] and it is so nice to have a group of people who get running and appreciate it as much as I do. There will be more races to come.

I'm just getting started.

Take My Advice

2011-12-19T19:44:00.000-06:00

Occasionally, I like to point out what facebook was created for. The commencement of facebook and what it has become are very different.

And I am sure I am being completely insensitive when I say that the child updates/profile pictures are - well..... not what Zuckerberg had intended facebook to entail when it was created. I know, I know, I have photos of my dog on there.

Here's the thing. I am a child of the 1980s. If I knew that my parents had blasted photos of me and funny quotes that are currently sitting out there in cyber world, I think I would be weirded out by it.

So this is why I have decided to stop putting up photos on facebook of the children. Not mine. I have none. But of other people's children. Because I feel like I am exploiting them.

And on a totally separate note, I want to say that last year for work, we were asked to give our new year's resolutions I succeeded in mine. Yes - I vowed to stop carrying three bags and a coffee cup to work and it worked all year! Yes!!

Also - since I like to give unsolicited advice out here and never get much feedback, have any of you stopped using so much water? Started exercising? Ended a relationship? or simply started some therapy?

It completely baffles me why more people don't take better care of themselves. How can people continue to do nothing for exercise and eat garbage while watching reality television all day long? The perks of exercise are so AMAZINGLY incredible which INCLUDE:

1) Better mood
2) More energy

Hello?!

Oh! Did I mention looking good? Skinny waist!And you will skip an avocado because it is fattening and eat fried cheese curds?? What is that all about?

And what's the deal with marrying your first true love? Do you really think thirty years down the road, you aren't going to have changed and wondered what it would be like to live alone? Or date someone else? What is that all about?

Oh - and see that photo I have here with the non-exploited child? Yeah, with the Christmassy background? Yeah, that's right. Because I am agnostic, I guess.

I would also like to admit that I complain a lot that Madison is not diverse but don't do anything about it [Like a typical American]. I was thrilled to have attended a dinner party the other night that included four foreigners. And they were not all caucasian. I am making progress.

Lastly, I will share with you that my greatest fears are losing my dog and falling on the ice and not being able to run. Any suggestions?

Have a great day!

The Rules, 2011

2011-11-27T20:33:00.011-06:00

Well 2011 is coming to a close. We are almost in the twelfth month. And with this close, I would like to blog about what I have learned in relationships - AKA - "The Rules." I have blogged about them in 2008, 2009 and 2010.

A lot has changed for me. And a lot has stayed the same. For example, I am wearing glasses I have had since 2006. And a sweatshirt I have had since 2003. Ok, enough joking around.

I feel like I have become more of the person I was since I graduated. For example, running was very important to me in 2003. But it's even more of who I am now. And I was interested in cooking back then, too. But these days, I would say I am known as a pretty great cook. Even more so in the past few months. As we get older, we grow more into ourselves. A grumpy thirty year old is going to be a NASTY fifty year old. Just remember that.

And so, we move onto..... My rules:

1) I believe this was about not living in the same state as your parents or your partner's parents. Here is what I learned about this that makes a VERY large impact on your entire relationship. I love not feeling like we have to check in with our folks. However, if I had to change rule number one, I would definitely change it to: He must get along with his parents and enjoy them. He must have no conflicts with his parents. This is first and foremost. If he enjoys his parents, his ENTIRE baggage is very, very tidy - if at all existent. And so, I enjoy that our parents are far away. And I love that we both appreciate and love them dearly.

2) No Marriages. I still agree that a starter marriage is totally cool. As long as he doesn't have some ex who he doesn't get along with or has access baggage with, I am totally down with a starter marriage. It's practice for the real thing.

3) I am stuck on no kids. First of all, I don't know if I want them. I don't want a man who has them. I made the mistake of waiting until the end of the date to ask Tattoo Boy if he had any. [he doesn't]. It is something you need to ask at my age. Kids are cute. So are puppies and I don't even miss those. No kids. Thank you.

4) Friends are first.... Hmmmm.... I have a lot of them. I have really great friends. I have to say, I am so lucky. I hope they will tell you I put them first, but I would have to ask them. Ladies, please comment here!

5) Don't Allow Men to do Manly Things for You... You know how I was single for one month and one day? It's not because I am "dependent." In fact, I would think I am the opposite. I do a lot on my own. And as of late, I really can't think of any handy work I had my man friend do. I hang my own pictures, I move my furniture, I fix things. I am woman!

6) I fully believe a workaholic is no good. Still. I will always stick to this rule. Anything with the word "holic" at the end is bad news.

7) Same Age. I still believe..... Yes - date someone in your generation. The energy/vibes/aging process remains consistent with yours. I can't relate to someone who still gets drunk at 9 AM, as they wouldn't be able to relate to someone who wants to listen to hours of NPR.

8) Yes - your ideal day needs to match. If you don't have the same interest in how you would spend a day together, you do not have the same interests. I am very active and do not like sitting around. Fortunately for me, my man is one of the top runners in town. He has motivated me to become faster. We love exercise, take work seriously and love to blog/social media. We also love "working the room" together, meeting new people, cooking/eating, being outdoors, etc. So important!

9) I added the one about being attractive. You really need to be attracted to your partner. This is so true. Forget a fat slob. He's gotta care for himself. And you need to find him cute.

Fit & Fabulous

2011-11-21T20:51:00.005-06:00

Call me crazy, but I want to know what it feels like to get into the shower without being sore. Or sweaty. Or physically challenged for that matter. Actually, I wouldn't want to know. I would be slightly disgusted with myself. I am not Joan Benoit. But I like to workout. I am a runner. And I can't imagine getting into the shower, day after day, without a workout. How do you do it? Doesn't it feel gross? Imagine how much more you could do. The energy you would have. The food you could energize with.

Now that I have lived in Madison for over three years, I am no longer impressed with the amount of outdoor activity. I want to know why more people aren't involved. I can't relate to just waking up and getting in the shower and getting dressed. That sounds gross to me. How do you do it?

I recently read an article in the "Times" about begginer runners. They wanted to know what podcast was motivating people to run. And I realize that it's not normal - this need to run every morning [well, six days a week, anyway]. Most people need an accountability partner. Or they sleep in their running clothes. Or they attend a "weigh in." There is something that makes them get up and go running. For me, it's just part of who I am. One day at work, someone asked me, "Did you go running this morning?" And I was appalled. "Did you brush your teeth this morning?" I wanted to ask them. If you see me at work, I have gone running. If I have the stomach flu, I have not gone running. Otherwise, I run. I have become even more strict as I have gotten older. And I have become faster. "I don't have enough time." is a completely unexucusable truth - you are telling me "It's not a priority." And you know what? It's not for a lot of people.

So besides doing it for yourself, be healthy for your kids. I notice a ton of people who are obese. NPR just published an article stating that the american population is becoming more and more obese. And I have a real problem with people who aren't eating real food. I am currently finishing my dinner of all natural-local-tortellini, organic kale and organic mushroom sauteed in garlic. Does your meal have color? I am not better than you. I may be healthier, that's all. You're probably cooler than me.

I am not saying I am superior. But the next person who tells me while they are eating their "Wonder bread" [which isn't even real bread, mind you] that my sauteed, locally grown onions "look gross" can suck it.

2001 Versus 2011 - Halloween

2011-10-30T16:38:00.008-05:00

I love Halloween. Besides my famous soup in a pumpkin, I love all fall dishes and desserts. And I sense from facebook that I share this passion with a lot of my 198 friends.

I finally had that infamous Halloween party I have been wanting to host for the past nine years. While we held one my senior year in college with the football frat, this one differed slightly and here is how:

1) I didn't have to have anyone "work" the door, turning away unwanted party-goers. Although there were two other parties going on on my floor, there were no mystery guests. The only non-invited guest was a miniature pincher dressed as a lobster, but Scout didn't mind [and neither did I].

2) I baked all day long and served homemade cupcakes, cookies, dips, snacks and my famous soup. Meanwhile, back at the Zeta House in 2001, We spent twenty-five minutes hiding all of our food so drunk guests wouldn't eat our groceries.

3) I had a little wine/beer table. Flashback to 2001: We had five kegs of Milwaukee's Best Light - AKA "The Beast".... and the kegs were kicked by 2 AM. Oh - and we had to get up at the crack of dawn [you know - like 10 AM] to drive to Canton, Ohio to get the kegs by closing time at noon.

4) My mini pumpkins/gourd decorations are still in tact today. Back in the Zeta house, the mini pumpkins were dumped in the washing machine, unbeknownst to us and my roommate ended up washing [and drying, mind you!] a mini pumpkin - only discovering it while she was folding all of her laundry. At least we had a laundered pumpkin.

5) There is no evidence of a party in my condo this morning. In the olden days, those new rushes were forced to come to our house before noon with hangovers to scrub our house clean like unpaid maids. Besides a pumpkin gone missing - I think I saw it smashed outside today, my peers are pretty mature - having helped clean up my place before I passed out at 1 AM.......

Baby Boom

2011-10-12T22:36:00.004-05:00

Wow! Long time, no talk, people.

I feel so lucky because I had the best summer ever. I just took Madison in and didn't take it for granted.

One Saturday, I was about to go boating and I had a little baby on my hip. "My sister is due any day," I told the proud parents. And just then, I received a text that my sister was in labor.

So, I went to meet the baby. And we talked a lot. Not the baby and me. We didn't talk at all. In fact, he just did a whole lot of baby things that I am sure I did, too. And Janie [that's me] thought more and more about the kid thing. I am not a natural with these newborns. I like the toddler age. That looks fun. But what happens to a couple during this time scares me terribly. I talked with my brother-in-law and sister. A lot.

And here is what we talked about: Vasectomy? Tubal Ligation? Which? So - something needs to happen to prevent the procreation when a couple is done reproducing. Correct? What is more invasive? One of them needs to do something. A woman cannot take birth control hormones forever. It's not healthy. The rhythm method results in more kids. So does the "pull-out" method. And my understanding is that most couples who have several children end up with abstinence anyway. So - why the heck have kids if you don't feel like that was a goal in life? [They did not tell me this, I have just read a ton on the topic]. No exploitation, here!

I still feel like at forty, if I can manage to have one, I would. But I am not going to lie here. I hate liars, anyway. I am not afraid to die. I am not afraid of a lot of things. I am terrified of child birth. I am perfectly happy and proud to show off my ten year old golden retriever. I have raised her. Yeah - she's wild and all. But, I have had her since she was a pup. I don't need to "squeeze something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a lemon."

Besides, how would I give up my pinot grigio for nine months? Life is too good without kids. Besides, we have a horrible overpopulation.

A Eulogy of Sorts

2011-09-20T19:16:00.003-05:00

While running this morning, I was thinking about all of the people I would like to thank for where I am today. And by today, I mean literally today. Tuesday, September 20, 2011. Here in Madison, Wisconsin.

I would like to thank the following people:

Melissa, Gretchen, and Emily. Oh - and Pitbull. Oh and Tattoo Boy, too.

Melissa got me in touch with Tattoo Boy. Actually, she pushed this a while back. So for that, I say "Thank you, Melissa!" You are the bomb. Not only have you encouraged me to pursue this, but you have helped me to get here - with work/life/sanity - I owe you.

Gretchen because as I say, I was already happy and she showed me that I could be even happier. She introduced me to boating and tailgating. She showed me how much more fun life can be [not even materially].

Emily helped me prep for some dates. I was a bit of a wreck and boy did she help. And when I texted her from the bathroom on my first date with Tattoo boy, she reminded me that you only live once.....

Which brings me to Pitbull. One of the songs of our summer. "You might not have tomorrow...." So - thank you, Pitbull. And if ever I have room on a boat for one more person, I will bring you, Pitbull. [And not T-Pain].

And then Tattoo Boy - I am not ready to reveal his identity because - well - if you have seen me out with a boy with tattoos, then you know. But thank you to you, too.

Goodman Pool Dog Dip

2011-09-12T20:17:00.001-05:00

Naughty Dog!

I don't know what happened but in the past few months, my dog has turned into a very crazy and energetic "geriatric" dog.

She is currently on her side, kicking her paws around, rolling around like a puppy.

She is ten years old. And according to most people, she weighs almost as much as me. Truthfully, she is stronger than me. Way stronger.

For whatever reason, I always take her to all dog excursions. And yesterday was no exception.

"Hey Scout! Wanna go to the Goodman Pool Dog Dip?!?!"

"I just ate a hot dog out of a toddler's hand and while Janie bought the screaming and crying three-year-old a brand new hot dog, I checked out the men's room while she had to wait outside as I trotted around....."

Yeah Sconnie!

2011-09-11T08:44:00.004-05:00

My friend who got me hooked on boating has now turned me on to [don't faint].... tailgating.

If there is one thing I never understood when I moved here, it was the amount of hype leading up to a Badger game. So when my friend was holding her birthday party at the Stadium bar during the Badger opener, I experienced the "hype." There is certainly no lack of team spirit in this town. And I get why people enjoy it so much.

Tailgating is an excuse to drink. Do you think I can even tell you who we played? No. I can't. I don't care. I could care less. I don't know anything about sports. I don't know what "tackle" means. Or what constitutes a "touch down." But I am glad when I hear that we won. And while I stood outside the stadium and saw that the game was over, I had to approach passersby to ask who won and how it went. And tattoo boy had a ticket to the game but never even made it into the stadium. Because clearly, tailgating is more important.

So here is how my conversation with said friend went on Tuesday evening:

JGW: [That's me] Is there a Badger game on Saturday?
SF: [That stands for "said friend" to keep her completely anonymous besides this photo I have of us tailgating] Let me look at my phone. Yes. Oregon State at 11 AM.
JW: There goes our Saturday. Where are we tailgating.

Now, flash forward to yesterday [Saturday, September 10, 2011]

I am up and out at 6 AM. I go running, eat breakfast, shower, get the dog out and make it to Ironman volunteer training by 8 AM. I know, I know - you're all thinking I am a renaissance woman. Which I am, of course. Walk around the farmer's market and by 9:30ish, said friend and I are having a bloody mary on State Street. We then proceed to walk towards the stadium where we drink beers all day and visit with friends. By 7 PM, I am exhausted, have a massive headache and it occurs to me that I still have a dog that is probably starving. Oh wait a minute - she is always starving.

And I was such a huge fan yesterday, that I do know we won 35 to nothing. Take that, Oregon State! I was such a huge fan that here is what I texted my dad [a UW grad student]:

2:10 PM: Yeah Sconnie! [whatever that means....] Did you see the game?
2:29 PM: [Bob Winston, aka "Dad"] No. Details.
2:36 PM: [I would have responded sooner but this was the third out of about 85 times that I dropped my phone on the floor of the bathroom] ME - We won. 35 to nothing. Oregon State.
2:37: I am grandfathered in thanks to you.
2:39: [Dad] Tres
3:00: JGW - Where is ur name on Union South? [He made a donation towards the new Union bldg. But it wasn't like one million dollars or anything like that]

So, as you can see - I am now a huge Badger fan. Oh - and I am sort of into the Packers too. And I love cheese curds. So I am a real Wisconsinite now.

'Tis the Night Before the Weekend

2011-08-25T20:50:00.005-05:00

This week was not as exciting as last week. Besides inhaling a piece of granola for the second time and "choking" [Ok - It really wasn't choking], I didn't do anything out of the ordinary.

This "Spacer Dog Guy Owner" from the dog park was texting me to get together. Here is how it went:

SDG: [That's for Spacer Dog Guy]"Hey Janie! What are you up to this weekend?"

JGW: [That's for Janie G Winston] "Oh - I think a bunch of us are going to Plan B." [Then thinking to myself, "Is this dude wanting to hang out one-on-one or what? I said I had a group...."]

SDG: [A few days later] Hey Janie! How was your weekend?

JGW: [24 hours later] Good. You?

SDG: Great. I visited family, etc, etc. Play by play. [I don't know you but I am going to tell you all about my wknd] You want to meet for lunch one day this week?

[JGW is thinking - "This is so random! I met him like one time! Do I have some sign on me that says I am looking for lots of dates or what?" I mean, he is cute and all]

So, I am having a drink with my friend and I am telling her about this. How innocent are you people? The advice that I didn't take that was offered to me was:

"He's probably looking to meet new people since he is relatively new in Madison." And I am like, "He wants to go on a date with me."

So, here was my response to him:

"You mean like a date? Because I sorta got a man...."

And forty-eight hours later, realizing I am going to see SDG again really soon [afterall, this is Madison and we go to the same dog park], it occurs to me that I better make sure I didn't offend him.

JGW: Sorry if that was rude.... I just didn't want to lead you on and I am very blunt.

SDG: It wasn't rude. It was just letting me know.

Aha! I knew it! So, the moral of the story is to be forward, people and also I would have to say that the dog park is a good place to meet people. So, make sure you look hot at the park.

And here is my dad several days after I broke up with my former "Mr. Right Now:"

Dad: [That stands for Dad] So, are you making any friends?

JGW: [Thinking to myself, I have a zillion friends. Why is he asking me this?] Oh! You mean like am I dating?

Dad: Yes.

JGW: C'mon just say it! I am having fun. I don't think I really need more friends, per se.

And then came Tattoo Boy....

Here is me in therapy:

JGW: So, I am already talking to this new guy. And you know, I worry because I don't believe in marriage. And it makes me a little nervous.

Therapist: Well, do you get really intense in the beginning?

JGW: Yes.

Therapist: Ok. Well since you are aware of that, you need to be cautious of that.

JGW: Ok. I am fine with that.

And so, I am going home with him this weekend.... [Afterall, it's been at least - what - a few weeks since we started hanging out?]

Other than that, boating was a success this past weekend. We spent the day on Lake Mendota, through the locks to Monona. Very fun times. I think the mad dash from the hair color appointment to prevent aging to the Union to hop on the boat was a success. [I had about 20 minutes notice]. But I packed my bikini to my hair appointment. Just in case.

Sadly, summer will be over in about one month. I am ok with this. Soon, I will be cross country skiing over the lake. And the Halloween party I have been talking about will have taken place. I even had a dream the other night that I was picking out my costume.

Stay tuned for more fun summer adventures.

The Past Week

2011-08-17T18:27:00.001-05:00

This summer has been far from dull. After I got all into boating, and losing a flip flop and my keys in the elevator shaft, I have now seen a dead body and had a small (but not serious) injury.

Here's the run down. I befriended a Forensic Pathologist who mentioned he was on his way to an autopsy. I wanted to watch. So, I got to see a body being autopsied. But I feel really bad for the situation so I am not going to say anything else about it. Except that it was more than I imagined. That and if you decide to have a cup of coffee at EVP in the VA hospital, just know you're feet away from dead bodies in a cooler.

I then had an ultimate weekend of partying it up in Mad-town with my first visitor! My cousin stayed with me and we had a ton of fun including running into my ex-boyfriend at a bar ["Hello!" if you are reading this!] and an old "wayward fling" at the same time ["Hello if you are reading this!] who approached me as I was having a "laughing attack" from all the hype at 1:30 in the morning. My boat captain who was out for the fun decided to bail on us and aborted our boating plans on Sunday which was disheartening.

I have now been hanging out with tattoo boy [because, you know, I was completely single for one month and one day - entirely too long], who agrees to randomly hang out with all my "new friends" who I meet when I am out and about.

Do you ever notice in Madison how friendly everyone is? I have this facebook policy that I have to stay under 200 friends at all times, but I keep on expanding my social circle here, so I am constantly at 199 friends. [By the way, if you try to find me on facebook, I am really hidden].

And while we were out boating a few weekends ago, everyone asked me how I knew the captain and I told them "We met at a Starbucks on State Street two years ago." And then I realized how weird that sounds. And today I had lunch with someone I met on the Barriques patio. And when you are out drinking, you tend to become friendly with people on the patio and then the next thing you know, there are four of you, two guys and two girls and you look like two couples [even though none of you know each other], and that's just how I roll. And tattoo boy totally goes along with this. I think in the last two weeks, we have sat with random strangers at bar tables 50% of the time like we are on some double date. Do you know what I am talking about? It's a Madison thing.

Take last night, for example. Well - let's start with my injury. Walking the old dog around the square, she smelled something and took off and took me down to the ground with a hard hitting of the head. Mortified and in pain, a cute man offered to help me in which my friend said I should have invited him to come over because she was with me and she thought he was cute. My clothes were dirty [she pulled me down by a tree on a small tree lawn], my ass hurt and I was worried about a concussion, so I decided that I should go to Graze and have five glasses of pinot grigio.

Meanwhile, tattoo boy was texting me, so I told him he should probably wake me up every two hours during the night to make sure I didn't have a concussion - doctor's orders.

So, hanging out at Graze, Mr.Divorcee comes over to tell me his problems [I think I may have asked him a question or two] and found out that he had a vasectomy and his ex has a personality disorder. Since my new hairdresser likes Graze [after all, I met her there - sort of], I invited her to meet me there and the next thing I know, we are seated at a table with Tattoo boy, hairdresser and vasectomied/divorcee - like we are all good friends.

I would like to announce that I finally bought a new camera which was so ridiculously overdue. Thanks to the several glasses of pinot grigio I had last Monday night, I spent over $300 on silent auction items that I won. I also have a $200 to Williams Sonoma so I can go shopping for the Halloween party I am throwing this year that I haven't stopped talking about on a daily basis.

On that note - time to go get walked by the D-O-G!

I'm on a Boat

2011-08-08T20:41:00.003-05:00

This summer I was introduced to the boat culture. I was never exposed to the lifestyle of boating until now. And when I like something, I want to do it a lot. It's like once you start you just can't stop. Since going out on the water, I have been out three more weekends and I am going again this upcoming weekend.

Besides being surrounded by the beauty of Madison, it's total serenity. There are very few things I have experienced in my state of happiness that take me to this extreme.

Now that I am getting the hang of it, I know the drill. You pack a lot of snacks/alcohol and put on a bikini. So, as we bounced across Mendota, I actually enjoyed the rough waters as our "captain" purposely chased and hit up every rough wave, tossing me into the air. We docked over by the mental institution (somewhere off Northport, I think). That's where all the boaters anchor. Then you swim in the water, have drinks and mingle with the other boats anchored around you. You may even exchange numbers, beverages, suntan lotion, etc. And if you are really friendly, you will tie your boats up together.

What's not to like about this? It's a really social hobby. And while I have absolutely no interest in having my own boat, it's nice to have friends who do.

Have you heard the song by "Lonely Island?" They really describe the heavenly journey. And also I have this secret crush on Andy Samberg. He seems like he would be a super fun guy to go out with to a bar. Or bring to a wedding. So Andy, if you are reading this, and you win another free boat ride for three, feel bring me and T Pain. (Because I am sure he is reading this).

The 2011 summer will go down in history. I'm on a Boat!

The Origination of this Blog

2011-07-31T22:54:00.004-05:00

Here's what I really want to blog about. I am single. I have been single for almost one month. I am sure that all my ex boyfriends are reading this. As well as any man I have gone out with on a date and will be going out with. Not because I am arrogant. But because they will tell me. Or they have told me. I have not been single in a really long time. And it's time to be single.

I am non-committal. No. I take that back, but I am not deleting it. I am anti-marriage. And while I have been asked if I am working on that in therapy, I don't see a point. I am happy with it. When I first started this blog in 2008, I wrote about getting out of a relationship. And the main thing I point out is that if you are unsure, then it is time to get out which most people do not do. And I do what I want because life is just too short to do it any other way.

Now, I know someone is going to verbalize that I am being way too open here and this posting is not to be intentionally specific or anything like that, but I need to get this out there in the open.

When asked this week why I started the blog, I realized that I had never even told the story. Three years ago, I was thinking about starting one when my sister e-mailed me a blog on the progress of her friend's house project. I looked at their blogspot site and saw that I could create my own. And I did. Right then and there. I wanted to journal about my move to Madison, Wisconsin. And then I e-mailed some people and told them I had started my blog about my new life.

And the fresh journey still feels extremely refreshing. And this was never a site to bash ex boyfriends and it never will be. I like to talk about my personal experiences. And now that I am single and I have pointed out how easy it is to put yourself out there. I am going to repeat my earlier posts.

And while my aunt just said that people meet either at a bar or online, I completely disagree. I have never met anyone online and I never will. I have nothing against it. It's just not my thing. I have also never dated anyone I met at a bar. Everyone is fair game, so the opportune time can happen - well - at any moment. Always be prepared for that.

And that's all I am going to say for now. Especially since I just scheduled a date with someone who is probably reading this......

The Shaft & the Flip Flop Blow-Out

2011-07-28T20:00:00.001-05:00

The funniest thing happened the other day. My friend and I were walking down State Street, while my dog dragged me along as she always does, when all of a sudden, I blew out my flip flop. (I did not step on a pop-top. Not sure what that is, either).

I had to cruise into the shoe store. Fortunately for me, the shoe store is about two store fronts down from the "blow-out" incident. As I hobbled down the sidewalk, the dog pulling my arm out of the socket, I entered the shoe store with one shoe on/one shoe off. I was forced to buy a new pair of shoes, even though I didn't really see any that I liked. And that is why I now own a pair of moccasins.

Running late for a "man appointment," if you will, my friend had to come over and assist me after the flip-flop incident, so I wasn't late.

Move onto Tuesday. I am at work. I walk onto the elevator with a co-worker. My arms are full of stuff. I am leaving for an appointment. As I enter the elevator, I drop my collection of keys. As I look down, it's like slow motion. All of a sudden, they have disappeared down the elevator shaft. What do I do? Those are my only set of keys. My car key is worth about $300 (it has a chip in it), my condo key is $50 to replace, etc. I laugh. Completely hysterical. Uncontrollable laughter.

Well, the building engineer goes down to the basement and about thirty minutes later I am reunited with the bent-up, busted looking keys. And I was very, very happy to see my keys. So now I know that if you drop something down an elevator shaft, you can recover the item.

If you blow out your shoes, you may end up with a pair that you don't necessarily want. But at least I have a cute pair of moccasins and some funny stories.

A Real Kind of Touristy Day

2011-07-24T10:58:00.012-05:00

After reading "Water for Elephants," I suggested that a few of my friends hit up the Baraboo Circus World Museum with me. I enjoy seeing what inspires an author to write a story and I thought we would be able to envision more details from the book. No trip to the Circus Museum can be accomplished without a trip to Wollersheim Winery. So, it was a big day for us city gals!

Upon arrival, I discovered that I was very hot and sweaty. We opted to sit in the big top and watch a circus performance. After looking around at a few things such as a train that originally stored some horses, original photographs and replicas of what would be referred to as "freak show circus people," we sat under the big top for the "greatest show on earth."

Sitting in the uncomfortable chairs, I was tired, hot and sweaty when some man around my parents age came out to do an intro. As he blabbed about the history of something, my friend on the left looked at me and said, "What the hell is he talking about?" I admitted that I wasn't listening and asked the friend on the right. Certain that she always listens and pays attention to every instructional detail, she confessed that she was not paying attention, either. So I am afraid I can't tell you what the intro entailed. Besides, we were all distraught because we had all checked our phones while waiting for this show to start and found out that Amy Winehouse had died.

Once the show got started, a man who is probably not much older than me took the microphone and started singing some song about the circus. He was wearing a cheesy costume and I was slightly embarrassed for him. And that's when I lost it. I laughed so hard I was crying. It was too funny. Here we were, these city girls, after a week of wining and dining and dating and what have you, and we were amidst a bunch of white Wisconsin people, watching a circus performance.

I must say, though - once the performers got going, it was an excellent show. It's an intimate area - not a lot of space. They were very, very talented. There were dogs, a monkey, a horse, a pony and an elephant. Our main question after walking out of the show was "How much money could they possibly make?"

We then moved on to Wollersheim for some wine tasting and snacking. I actually like their Prairie Fume so we opted for that and a cheese spread. I must say, I think Wollersheim could be a nice romantic excursion if you are trying to think of a nice date place. The grounds are really pretty.

After a long heated day of exploring some of Wisconsin's finer things, I am headed out to Spring Green for another warm and exhausting day of summer. Did I mention I love it here?

Emotional Movies

2011-07-17T12:51:00.005-05:00

Three years ago, I went to see the "Sex and the City" movie with my loving sisters and one (of two) brother-in-law.

I love movies. I love seeing them and I love talking about them with friends. I feel like you can have some really great movie conversations. Mainly, I like to discuss feelings which comes out in these discussions. I will ask questions such as:

"Did you cry?"
"Did you watch it alone? Did it make you lonely for someone?"
"Was it depressing?"
"You need to see "X" because it will make you laugh out loud."

So when it really comes down to it, I am all about setting my emotions up for something when I see a movie. I have to be in the right mood or place to see something sad/heartfelt/funny/cheesy, etc.

The other thing about movies is that I have to be comfortable letting myself cry. And sometimes I am really in the mood for crying and other times I refuse to let myself do it. And crying can feel really, really good. And really therapeutic a lot of the time. So once the tears are allowed, they usually don't stop.

I have not let myself cry during a movie in a really long time.

But back when I went to see "Sex and the City," I got really teary eyed in that last scene. There is nothing significant about it to the average person. At the time, I was living in Cleveland, thinking about moving to Madison. Miranda, Carrie, Samantha and Charlotte all walk down the street together. And they look so happy. So happy to be united. And here I was, watching it with two of my closest friends (even if they are my sisters) and it felt so good to be with them. But I was really, really missing my girlfriend time with all of my girlfriends. And it made me cry a little. I'll never forget that feeling because of my extraordinary memory.

So now that I am in Madison and have made a lot of good girlfriends, it has felt so good to be able to walk down the street like the gals from the movie. And know that I have a nice community here of friends. Where I can wake up in the early morning and have text messages awaiting to meet for breakfast or dog parking or whatever. It just feels so good.

A Week in Review (Or Something Like that...)

2011-07-10T19:27:00.003-05:00

For the “glass is half-empty” folks, I will remind you that we are entering our third week of summer. (No, the summer is not “almost over.” It ends in September,) We need to focus on the positive, people.

Madison has had a very exciting summer which has hardly yet begun. While protesters are still yelling to “Recall Walker,” emergency vehicles were speeding by me on my morning run ten mornings ago. Knowing something was wrong, I walked over to see a building in flames before I left for work. My poor friend had lost everything in that building, as did everyone else who lived there and two business owners are without a business.

While the Concourse Hotel graciously gave rooms to the displaced residents for a week, it saddened me to run into one of the displaced victims wearing what looked like some “St.Vinny’s giveaway” as she walked to work. I gathered some of my favorite clothes and dropped them to my friend. She needs to remain looking fashionable. No sense in dumping a bag of tee shirts to these people. It’s sad.

A week before this fire, a woman who was walking to her campus job was hit by a metro bus that was off duty, driving back to the station. The poor woman died as she crossed the walk (and had the right of way), as she did every day, to walk to her job. The city was shook up by this event. I feel horrible for her family. And I feel horrible for the bus driver who must have had some sort of blind spot.

I have always said that Madison drivers are much more courteous with pedestrians and bikers and we just never hear about this. It was another sad day.

And speaking of bikers, Trek’s new program has distributed bike racks surrounding the capitol square, around the city, including on the hospital grounds. You can rent them with a credit card and have a bike for a day. Their goal is something like “20 in 2020” – I believe they want 20% of the city to commute by bike by 2020. The bikes are being utilized a lot – I notice them riding by me when I run in the mornings. It’s a great initiative for this healthy city.

Personally, my summer has started out nicely. I continue to meet a lot of great people and hang out at all of my favorite walkable places. The night scene is really fun and as much as I love to stay in after work in the winter, it is too hard come summertime.

My favorite spot is Graze, right on the square. I also like drinks at Natt Spil and I still prefer any night of dancing at Plan B. Enjoy the summer and if you have a boat, feel free to take me out on it. (No Pressure).

An Extraordinary Memory

2011-07-04T23:05:00.003-05:00

I have an exceptional memory. I have always been told that I "scare" people with this unusual trait. If you want to call it one.

I have read about people who have these types of memories. It's a blessing and a curse. There are a handful of people out there who "remember every day of their life." While I can't say my memory is that good - it is very good.

I can pretty much tell you what I was wearing or what year or what day of the week an event occured. It's a blessing because it is extremely helpful in the business world. It is a curse because imagine all of the sadness in life. And how crystal clear it remains in your mind.

I think about terrible events that happened on a daily basis. Not a day goes by when I don't think about deceased relatives/friends and reflecting on that news. Where I was - what day of the week it occured, who I was with, what I was wearing. I am not exaggerating when I say that. Supposedly humans have 2,000 - 3,000 thoughts a day. I would be curious to participate in a study for this and see how this is measured. While this may be the case, I would say 20 - 30 of my thoughts are of sad memories.

As I have grown, I feel that there is a lot of joy in life. I work in a health care setting. I see sorrow. I have plenty of friends who only have one parent who is alive. I feel lucky in that sense. Sometimes, I feel lucky that we have little children in my family, too. After walking out of the Children's hospital. It's a blessing that way.

While this memory may be haunting and hard, it helps me to stay happy about the joy in life.

I dare you to challenge me about what you were wearing when we met or what year a movie came out or what day of the week something happened. Because I can tell you that. It's a phenomenon. One that I am not always comfortable sharing with people. And if you think I don't often look back and think about when I heard the news that your parent was diagnosed with cancer, or that your friend was in a horrible accident, think again. Because I am thinking of you each day.

A Madison Summer - Why Leave?

2011-06-23T10:38:00.008-05:00

What's going on in Madison, Wisconsin?

This is the second summer where I have decided not to go anywhere. I know some people think I like to travel a lot, but I am scaling back. And the main reason for this is that it is too hard to leave this great city in the summer.

The weekend before last, I wanted to do the following:

-Sundance movie (one of two in the country)
-Farmers' Market (the largest in the U.S.)
-Maple Bluff garage sales
-Dog Park (we have so many)
-Friend's birthday party
-Fruitfest at Plan B
-And of course, my daily run (million of paths)

And I did it all. The summers here are just fabulous. While talking with friends about going to New England or Canada over the summer, I just knew I would miss it here too much. I am staying put.

So I took a week off in July and decided to take a staycation. And I think a week isn't even enough to do all the great summer things I plan to do. Like go hiking at Devil's Lake, spend a day at the Goodman Pool and finally learn how to golf at one of our many courses.

Now flash forward to this past weekend and as usual, there were a million activities going on. I think I died and went to heaven when I received a text from a friend of mine who asked me to "drop everything and join her on her friend's boat." After a nice trip to the dog park with some friends, I walked a few blocks from my place, down a dock and stepped on the boat.

I have never experienced this boating scene before. And it was heavenly. The views were amazing, my friend was a blast and the day was perfect. I hope to god we do it again real soon. How many places can you live where you can walk out your door and have someone pick you up lakeside to be whisked away onto the water?

When I Retire

2011-06-13T21:40:00.005-05:00

It was almost ten years ago that I sat on the porch of my (dumpy) college house and talked to every normal student who walked by. My dog was a puppy on my lap. Beer in hand and fluffy golden retriever puppy in my lap, I loved chatting with the neighbors and inviting them to join my housemates on the porch.

I do feel like this helped improve the size and quality of our sorority, but maybe it's all in my head.

At the time, I had recently returned from a visit from my aunt and uncle's condominium on Long Island and saw how their kitchen faced their cul-de-sac. Retired, my aunt would interrupt my dad who was reading the Times to tell him that "Tony was receiving a floral delivery" and she wondered who it was from. While my dad seemed annoyed by this interruption, me being the nosy person that I am, realized how nice it is to have a view of everything from the front of your house.

And while I returned for my senior year of college, I announced to my friends that while I was scared of getting old and being bored, I discovered that if I just bought a condo where everyone knows everyone and the kitchen faces the front, I would be very happy. And so retiring became something to look forward to.

Ten years later, I am on my balcony. Here in Madison, Wisconsin. I have a nice city view. My "puppy" will be ten on Saturday. I color my gray hair once a month. The dog snoozes while I sit on my Adirondack chair and read a novel, quietly. Occasionally, we look up to see a person and their dog walking by. Other than that, I am entrenched in the book and a glass of wine and she dozes and looks up and barks here and now, at some dog below. I don't really care about watching all the people I know receiving "floral deliveries" but I do like the peacefulness on a summer night. And although I am not religious, I feel blessed to have my furry companion. Every day is a blessing.

Running on Madison

2011-06-07T21:05:00.005-05:00

I don't know if I buy the whole "addiction doesn't exist" theory. As a coffee drinker and runner, there is no way I could really go long without those two things. I also used to smoke. And it was hard to quit. Most people are shocked to hear that I smoked because I appear to be a health nut.

The thing about my addiction to running is that it really is an addiction. When I was having stomach woes and was told to skip coffee, for some reason, I thought I would be just fine. By the afternoon, I had a horrible headache. By the time I left work, I was in agony. I sat on the couch, crying with a washcloth on my head and called the doctor (already took too much aspirin). We were reunited the next morning. I had no idea how much my body needed it.

As for running, I make no excuses. Raining - I won't melt. Snowing - there's a treadmill. Early flight? What's wrong with waking up at 4 AM? 16 hour work day? How am I supposed to get my energy the next morning? Sick? It will make me feel better. There is something so great about how I feel when I am done that it's not worth skipping. Forget it.

I do run 6 days a week. I take Sundays off for several reasons. 1 - my right knee could use it. 2 - I could use a day to sleep in (which is rare). 3 - I can dance late into the night and not worry about anything.

So last Saturday, as I ran my usual routine, I saw all of the "no parking" signs for the following day's Madison Marathon. As I ran, I said to myself, "I am going to do the 1/2 tomorrow. I did a marathon. I run about 25 miles a week. I can do it. No problem." I am an adult who does what she says, once the announcement is made.

I texted my sister and asked if she could come watch me run. She said "sure!" I announced to my boyfriend "Hey Chris! Guess what? I am going to do the half marathon tomorrow." He said, "You haven't trained." I said, "I will be fine!" I made sure he could watch me. He said it was no problem. I walked over to the terrace and registered.

I was very excited. So for someone who doesn't do a regular 10 mile run but still runs 6 days a week, it was no problem. I ran about 9 minute miles and I ran the majority of it with my neighbor who I happened to run into at mile 2 or 3. She is 58 and training for the Ironman. I had no goals. I just wanted to have fun. And fun it was.

For those of you who haven't raced a lengthy race, I have the following recommendation:

Line family and or friends up along various miles on the route because it gives you something to look forward to. I had the family at mile 10 and the boyfriend/dog at mile 8. It's very helpful.

I was hosting a Memorial Day BBQ that evening. I even managed to go dancing until bar time that night. So for those people who "feel old"," I hate to say it, but sorry - I don't. Running is an addiction. And I guess I have it.

The Cultural Impact on Anti-Feminism

2011-05-23T21:25:00.005-05:00

I was taught the importance of being your own independent woman. Take my mom's four female first cousins, for example. Three of them kept their maiden name. And they aren't young. This slow moving progressive process has a lot of hiccups.

While we try very hard to teach our children that gender has no specific identity, they learn it through books, television, neighbors and tons of media sources.

I was watching my two and four year old niece and nephew the other day. Where some parents are splitting the responsibilities unevenely, their parents are pretty equal. They witness both parents cooking, cleaning, working, etc.

So when I took them to pick out cupcakes, I was literally shocked that my nephew requested a cupcake with a soccer ball. Where did he even hear the word "soccer ball?" This is not in his household vocabulary. My niece chose a cupcake with a kitty cat! I thought she was going to pick the alligator. I was disappointed. Not in them. But in what they are exposed to. Even in Madison. And I was so thrown off that he knew what the ball was - and was even able to indentify what type of ball - that I gasped and told the cashier I had no idea where he learned this. It was as if he had said a swear word.

Upon my sister's return home, I told her about this situation. She was slightly annoyed. It was clear that as hard as you try, even in Madison, Wisconsin, there are still old-fashioned people who think a ball is for a boy and a doll is for a girl.

When I was in the fifth grade, I listened over and over to my parent's record, "Free to be You and Me." I repeatedly sang the song, "William wants a Doll." Listen to the lyrics sometime. At the age of ten, I was taught that if a boy wants a doll, give him one!

While American Girl is a huge phenomenan, especially here in Madison - why not try buying one for your little boy? Kids may be genetically engineered. But if your little guy wants a doll, so be it.

Teach children to embrace anything. And don't code things as pink/blue. Remember, when I have a child, their name will be "Sam" and you will not know the gender....

Social Media Flaws

2011-05-22T10:49:00.003-05:00

I am pretty sure that when Zuckerberg started facebook, he never thought it would become an obnoxious, announcement driven online media tool to congratulate your two year old for having a birthday today. Here are a few sample updates:

1) I can't believe my baby is two today
2) Happy birthday to Aiden/Jaden/Heyden/Cayden! My baby is two!
3) Two years ago today was the best day of my life! Happy birthday little guy!

These updates were never intended to be on facebook. I joined facebook way back when you had to have a college e-mail. Now everyone uses it. And I get that it has resulted in some really wonderful things. My father reuniting with a high school friend or keeping in touch with my family in New York is a great tool.

I am not so sure that a two year old can read that his mother is wishing him a happy birthday on the world wide web. I know I am being insensitive because clearly, I am not a parent. But if I was, I wouldn't be blogging or probably on facebook much. (I am guessing).

And my sister who is on facebook (one is, one isn't) has children who have absolutely no internet presence. You wouldn't know from looking at her facebook profile that she has kids.

I am just wondering if any parents have considered starting a social media site for the kid sharing thing. A lot of people find it highly annoying to see a profile photo of a sonogram.

And on another note, the reason I started writing this entry is because facebook has become a lot of things. And one of them is the ability to "friend" people who you don't really keep in touch with. And you are "friends" but you still don't write to each other or acknowledge much. I don't see the point in this.

If you are going to be "friends," then at least keep in touch. Write on each other's walls. Acknowledge their statuses. Tell them you want to get together. So when I find myself snooping through a high school friend's photos, I will let them know on facebook that I am paying attention to them. If we aren't talking via FB, then I am unfriending them.

Since I joined facebook, I have unfriended about 100 people. I still have too many friends. I just don't see a point on being friends if we aren't talking. At all.

And maybe if you want to wish your little one a happy birthday, just do it in person.

Just a few thoughts about facebook.

My Parents, My Fans

2011-05-15T18:04:00.004-05:00

My parents are my biggest fans. If it wasn't for them, I wouldn't have moved to Madison. And this is for many reasons. One being that they took us here a lot growing up. And two because they were incredibly supportive of my decision to move here on a whim.

And that's how they have always been. Supportive. I am lucky.

When I talk with my current closest group of friends and we discuss our the marriages of our parents, two of them say their parents don't sleep in the same room anymore, several have divorced parents who don't get along. And this week, I asked a newer friend if her parents are still together and she responded with "They are but they shouldn't be." And might I add that we are in a generation where you have to ask each other if your parents are still married?

So while my parents are not together any more, they get along which is really nice. And you know, they are happy. And now that I am older, I can accept that and appreciate that they seem like they have really nice separate lives.

When we were in New York a few weeks ago, I gave a little toast to my parents. (I love giving toasts. Especially with an intimate group of friends after a glass of wine). And I said that we should toast my mom and dad. Because they did a really nice job (I think) of raising three daughters who turned into successful professionals.

And my parents have always had a lot of faith in me. They gave me the confidence that I have.

While a lot of my friends complain that their parents are crazy, or fight all the time, or whatever the issues are with them, I do really consider myself quite lucky. And I see a lot of value in their lives as a divorced couple.

Twenty Hours in Spring Green

2011-04-24T18:45:00.006-05:00

I have mentioned Spring Green several times during my blogging career. The farm house on 60 acres that my aunt and uncle have there is a delight.

Fortunately for me, I was asked to see a play at American Player's Theatre on Friday night, which is in Spring Green. The show was in their indoor theatre. Just being in that space is a treat. The play, Wisconsin Story Project's "Stories of Cancer" was fabulous. I have seen a lot of theatre in my years and this show was excellent. All of the actors were professional and not one of them was just mediocre. It was a heavy and hard show to watch at times. You see, this project was done in Madison, interviewing cancer patients who shared their stories. The words that they hate to hear, the research they did, the overwhelming amount of people who reached out to them, their fear of death and much, much more were shared in this staged reading. And it was very moving. It was also great to finally go to APT.

The evening was spent at the farmhouse and Chris and I booked a tour of Taliesin for the next morning. For the amount of times we have driven past it (like every time we drive to the farm,) it is crazy that we never went there before. I am so glad we did this, too.

A two hour guided tour was really fun and interesting. We saw the grounds where Frank Lloyd Wright was buried, his school, his sister's house and of course, Taliesin. If you listen to WPR a lot, you are probably used to hearing a lot about the murders there but this is hardly highlighted on the tour. What is so fascinating (where do I start?) is that he liked low ceilings, bringing the outdoors in, the house is 32,000 (yes, that is correct) square feet, there is no angle where you can take a picture of the entire house and people do live there now. The views are amazing. We were only allowed inside his studio. The majority of the tour is outside on the property. This was such a spectacular tour. If you live in Madison and haven't done it, make sure to do it.

We also stopped at the very tasty General Store afterwards for a yummy lunch where I asked them for their recipe of the vanilla chocolate ginger craisin bar. If I make it, I will post the recipe.

I love Madison and it's so special that we have such a famous little town so close by.

American Stores Designed for Lazy Americans

2011-04-19T19:48:00.003-05:00

I had a little trouble when I was bringing my 40 pound bag of dog food to my car on Sunday. A lot of you know I hate the Target in Madison. It completely depresses me. Target is where I buy my dog's food. I like to keep the money in my local community, but show me a local store that sells a 40 pound bag of lamb & rice dog food and I will be there.

Sunday was a gorgeous day. I parked about a tenth of a mile away from the Target and walked, as it was so nice outside and I wanted to savor it. Which brings me to this:

How come, when gas is almost $4.00 a gallon are you people driving up and down the aisles closest to the entrance of a store until you find a really close spot? My bf and I often talk about how we will park in the parking lot over from the business to walk into a store and see the same people we were stuck behind still driving around. It's called LAZY.

So I parked behind the Macy's. And walked to Target. I don't give a darn about being close to an entrance. As I left Target with the 40 pound bag, my cart "locked" at a stop sign and I was literally stuck. All the other carts surrounding me were also "locked" as I transported the hefty items from my locked cart to another locked cart. (My back still hurts. I had to run on the treadmill this morning instead of outside because it still hurts so much).

And I asked myself, "How on earth are people who actually walk (like myself) supposed to get all of this stuff to their cars?"

It didn't make sense. Whoever designed this chain didn't take into account that some people park far away and need some assistance to get all of their items to their car.

I finally dragged the cart (with locked wheels) as far as I could. I then approached an employee who told me that the staff inside should have told me that the carts lock. What? Did they just hire some person in a red polo with a sign stating,

"For people who enjoy walking a little more, please be aware that you will not be able to cart your heavy items to your vehicle. This store was designed for fat, lazy people who can cart their things to their car. Because most people prefer to drive around for 20minutes until they find a spot that's close."

And that, ladies and gentleman, is why we stick out when we are traveling in Paris, France.

I was annoyed, to say the least.

Please, if you can find me a nice shop where I can walk to from my condo to buy the food, let me know. I will then bring a strong person with me who can just carry it back. Who needs a car, anyway? Cars are overrated.

Walk somewhere and do your heart some good.

The 2011 Wisconsin Film Festival

2011-04-05T21:44:00.000-05:00

The initial run-down of options for the 2011 Wisconsin Film Festival sparked my usual interest and I chose to view three this year (as opposed to five my first year here and two last year). Three is a perfect amount. More than one a day is too much for me.

Here are the films I chose:

“Potiche”

“Made in India”

Shorts: “Mary & Bill,” “The Optima Hat Company” and “Style & Grace”

I recommend all of them.

"Potiche"

As a Francophile, I always enjoy a nice French film. A lot of the movies featured in Wisconsin’s film festival are documentaries and this was one of the few “cutesy” lighter film options. Catherine Deneuve and Gerard Depardieu star in this comedy that takes place in 1977 (filmed in 2010). While Deneuve’s husband’s umbrella company is striking, she has to take over after being a housewife her entire life. This is an entertaining film - something that doesn’t pull your heartstrings. Lots of funny scenes.

"Made in India"

Couples who cannot afford surrogacy in the states are now paying Indian women to house their babies in their womb. It is much cheaper. And you wonder why. Lisa and Brian, a stereo-typical “American” couple from Texas find a company who will pay Aasia, an Indian mother of three to be their surrogate. This feature length documentary makes the audience feel the human emotions for both the barren couple and Aasia and her family. To see the exploitation and politics that go on give you a glimpse of the desperation that people have for both money and to have a child. This was a very interesting film. And just when you think it is over after all of the challenges that they succumb to, you learn something more that makes you feel even differently walking away from the film.

“Mary & Bill"

As if you didn’t already know, I enjoy exercise. In this documentary, Mary Stoebe is a ninety year old Madison resident. And she is a triathlete. Bill Wamach is an eighty-three year old local who is a high jumper, competing in the National Senior Olympic Games. The two are portrayed doing their routinely disciplined work outs. Mary started doing triathlons at seventy-seven, so what is keeping you? They are in excellent physical shape. While they have suffered from some injuries (Mary is an avid down-hill ski instructor who was injured on the slopes and told not to do her last triathlon, while Bill survived a heart attack), the film was funny and inspiring. They were present for a question & answer session after the film. It’s amazing how healthy they appear. They look better than some people I know in their forties.

“The Optimo Hat Company”

A ten minute documentary on luxury hat making on the South Side of Chicago. It felt like watching an infomercial for the owner’s business. Nothing too exciting.

“Style & Grace”

A black barber shop that has existed in Madison for close to sixty years where Smitty has been cutting hair. Nothing happens and the quality of the film is low budget. As I often say, Madison is not the most diverse city and I felt the depiction of African Americans in this film was unfortunate. But Smitty has a nice community in his shop. While he soothes screaming toddlers who are getting their first haircut, two men are playing checkers at a table in the corner, just hanging out. It’s a nice, forty minute short.

Wisconsin Film Festival, you did it again!

Hold Onto Your Youth

2011-04-03T13:35:00.005-05:00

As a lot of you know, I loved college and miss it dearly. Would I go back and do the four years again? Maybe. A year ago, I would have said, "in a heart beat." But I am really comfortable with my life. And that college drama is so unnecessary.

You know how a lot of people wonder how old they look? I mean, I know that when I am out with my niece and nephew, people just assume that I am their mom. I look old enough to have toddlers. But I want to look like a college student sometimes. So, I was very excited to have a "college night out" last night.

Working and living on a large university campus, you are surrounded by youth. For me, it feels good. The kids continue to look younger as you get older. That's a fact.

So, last night, my girlfriends decided to go out with some university students and experience a night out as a UW student. I must say that I realized when we got home that because the undergrads we were with are of drinking age, we went to college bars that probably wouldn't take fakes, so the crowd in there didn't seem or "feel" particularly young.

First, we went to the Vintage on University. It was full of people - but the average age was probably thirty, so it wasn't bad. After a drink, my friend, MKA and I were ready to dance.

I guess I should tell you that I wore these brand new Hipster glasses (very BIG in Paris!), my American Apparel dress and a scarf. Hair in a pony tail, big earrings, knee high brown boots. Feeling good.

Anyways, we moved on to Wandos - notorious for their fish bowl drinks. For $20, you get a large fishbowl with a bunch of straws and you can share the H1N1 virus with all of your friends. The place was packed. En route, we passed hundreds of drunks, one who chose to canvas in a drunken stupor, piping, "Vote for Joan Kloppenburg on Tuesday!" Look - I am glad these drunks are still doing some good. The line was long and some kids let us right in the front (I told them I was Mrs. Wando....)

Once inside, we shared our bowl of viruses and it was actually really tasty. (We had a blue one). Lots and lots of people commented on my glasses. Mainly, that they liked them. One dude asked me my name and I told him it was "Harriet Potter." (See, the lady who sold me the glasses at H&M called them "Harry Potter glasses" so I felt compelled to tell this guy my name was Harriet Potter).

Another guy at the bar asked me if I went to UW and I told him I was a freshman. (I am actually the most honest person in the world, keep reading. I asked him, "Do you believe me?" He said, "You seem a little too comfortable with yourself to be a freshman." Great point! Well taken.

Next, we went to the Churchkey, where the undergrads PROMISED there is always dancing, but there was really hardly any. One of our chaperons put money in the jukebox and got some good tunes on, but I was working everyone, trying to get them out and not succeeding.

As I sang out, "Wave your hands in the air and wave 'em just like you just don't care," one of the coeds warned me that I was "really dating myself" with that lingo. Oops! (Snoop did it at his concert, so I thought I was ok).

Evidently, it was some sort of "Moms" weekend and a lot of moms were out with their daughters. I hope I don't look like that when I have college kids.

We got home at bar time and I refused to do the pizza portion of the evening, even though our college guides said any college night out involves a trip to Ians. I just wasn't into eating a greasy piece at 2 AM.

So, I did well and I will do it again. I mean, this wasn't any raging frat party by any means, but let's just say in my book, I was at some pretty cheesy college bars. And I feel great today.

The Best Cookies I Have Made

2011-03-28T19:33:00.004-05:00

So, a few years ago, I was looking for a blueberry crumble bar recipe and I stumbled upon the smitten kitchen blog. This blogger has the best recipes. If you are looking for something wholesame and tasty, she has a great site.

I was looking for a good cookie recipe a few months ago, when I found her most delicious oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. These babies are Divine (with a capital "D").

Here is the recipe:

Makes about 3 dozen cookies (I had to continously bring 6-10 to work on a daily basis, until my co-workers asked if I had poisoned them and was trying to slowly kill them).

8 tablespoons unsalted butter, at room temperature
3/4 cup sugar
1 cup light brown sugar, firmly packed
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 large eggs
1 1/2 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/8 teaspoon ground clove
1 cup quick-cooking oats
2 cups chopped pecans
2 teaspoons freshly grated orange zest (I only had a clementine - worked fine)
12 ounces semisweet chocolate chips

(I added craisins which I highly recommend!)

Preheat oven to 350°F. Line a large cookie sheet with parchment or a Silpat (nonstick baking mat). Using an electric mixer, beat the butter in a bowl until light and fluffy. Add both sugars, salt, and vanilla, and beat until well mixed, about three minutes. Stir in eggs, one at a time. Sift together the flour, baking soda, cinnamon, nutmeg, and clove in a separate bowl. Add half of the flour mixture to the butter with the mixer on low speed. Once the flour has been incorporated, add the second half. Stir in the oats, pecans, orange zest, and chocolate chips. Drop the dough, by the tablespoon, onto the cookie sheet and bake for 10 to 12 minutes or until golden. Remove from the oven and cool the cookies on a rack.

These make a ton of cookies. You will not be disappointed. I promise.

And this is one of the reasons I got my brand new mixer for my birthday.

MIA in Madison, Wisconsin

2011-03-23T06:30:00.000-05:00

Sorry I have been missing in action. As an American (and Americans like to blame), I fully blame AT&T for my disappearance on this blog. Enough said.

What have I been doing? Well, the Wisconsin budget bill was strangely passed and now there seem to be some glitches with it. No surprise there. As I walk around the capital on my extremely routine walks, the protestors are still there, but not as many. The rallies still take place every Saturday. The largest one, taking place on the 12th of March.

My parents were here for the big rally and I think it made them nostalgic, bringing back memories of their time in Madison during the Vietnam protests.

If there is one thing I can't reiterate enough about the protests here, it is that these are very peaceful and calm movements. Don't believe everything you see on t.v. Any newstation referring to "dangerous mobs" also shows palm trees in the background. And we do NOT have any palm trees in Madison, Wisconsin. Last time I checked, people associate this state as a frozen tundra filled with blizzardy winters. No palm trees here. So, lay off the station that starts with an "F" and ends with an "X." The only good thing they have going for them is a show called "Glee," so I am told, as I have never watched it.

Which leads me to a topic of my addiction to Bravo T.V. Yes - I am finally going to publicly and very openly admit that I am strangely addicted to all the housewife shows on Bravo. I am slightly embarassed about this and if you ask me why I like them, I cannot tell you. Riding in the car with someone the other day, I secretly confessed to her that I enjoy watching Bethenny Frankel. She asked me, "What do you like about her?"

Me: "What do I like about her? That's a really good question. Hmmm... Her voice is annoying, she is obnoxious and loud. What do I like about her?" Pause "You know, I like her business sense and I love her husband. I think he has a great personality and he is so cute."

And the more I think about it, I think I like that Bethenny really established a brand and then did what I want to do. She got pregnant at forty and then married a great guy. I have said one child at the age of forty sounds nice.

Now, here is the other thing that is going through my head this month. I am turning thirty-one on Friday. Thirty-one sounds old to me. And while I am ok with having a baby at 40, I may not be able to have a baby at forty. So that's a little sad. Friday is really my third twenty-ninth, by the way.

While I started the creams and the hair dying at thirty, I have decided to grow my hair long (even though I think my boyfriend prefers this length) and start saving up for an eye lift, when the crows feet show up. And I am not afraid to admit it.

And every year, my parents ask me what I want for my birthday. Up until I was about 21, I asked for a little sister and a dog. Well, I got the dog for myself, but I am still hoping for the baby sister.

A Brief Getaway from Madison

2011-02-27T20:40:00.006-06:00

I've decided it is best to keep the political situation that is happening here to myself and not publicize my opinion on my blog.

It is very close to home, physically and literally. For me, there is no way to avoid the news anchors as they film live coverage, the chants and the feeling of what "democracy looks like."

It feels good. Let's put it that way. These are peaceful protests, as I am sure you know by now.

For Christmas in 2009, I gave my boyfriend a bed and breakfast gift certificate. He decided to use it at an Inn near Milwaukee in Cedarburg, Wisconsin.

After a charity evening at the Madison Club on Friday night, we packed our bags and left the "biggest rally" down the road from my condo to hightail it towards this quaint town of Cedarburg, not far from Milwaukee.

Supposedly there is a zoning law on the main drag that only permits independent businesses. My two favorite stores were Lillies Goods and their other store, Weeds, owned by the same people. If you are looking for a nice gift, I recommend either place. After walking around the Cedarburg winery & shops, we sampled a few wines (Cedarburg's wine is the "sister" to Wollersheim) and checked in at the Washington Inn.

Walking around the little shops, we were told that our Inn has a 5:00 wine and cheese hour (of course, we had read about it online), and we made sure to be there promptly for our free wine and "spread" hour. But first, we settled into a huge jetted tub that is inside the room and warmed up from a day of non-stop fluffy snow. It was so relaxing. After sweating and trying to cool off from this luxurious tub, we enjoyed the snacks in the dining room. We had unlimited wine and cheese spreads, crackers and grapes. The room was mainly full of other couples besides one older woman. There were just enough tables so that we didn't have to sit with strangers.

We then walked over to Anvil, a former blacksmith shop with neat concrete walls and a two story dining room. It felt cozy and special, though. Even though it is two stories, it had a warm feel to it. We saw about three other couples from our Inn and pretended like we didn't see them (just kidding). As we sat at the bar, waiting for a table, the couple next to us chatted us up and we ended up next to them when we were seated.

A friend, Taylor, recently got me hooked on Old Fashions, so I ordered one while we waited. Old Fashions are very popular in Wisconsin. And tasty.

Our food was pretty good. We had veggie burgers. I thought it was tasty. Nothing incredibly special. We then walked down towards the Inn and I stopped in a chocolate place where I had a delicious milk chocolate turtle that was pretty special.

We then sat in the whirlpool tub and I was asleep by 10 PM. The best part of the stay was when we got breakfast in bed in the morning. I think that is the first time I spent an hour in bed, drinking coffee, eating fruit, enjoying my book. (without a starving golden retriever begging for food by my side).

I was also able to finish my 562 page book this weekend. It was so relaxing. Cedarburg is a special place. We plan to go back.

Cheers.

Democracy in Action on the Capital

2011-02-16T20:26:00.006-06:00

I am always hesitant to blog about politics but there is no way out of this one. As I often discuss the square, let me tell you what is looks like today. (See photo) If you aren't a local or haven't noticed us in the "Times," , it is a pretty heavy and stressful time in the land of "Progressive Madison."

A radical move to take away bargaining rights, force public workers to pay more into their benefits, and taking major cuts within schools and governments is just the tip of the iceberg.

And without giving my personal opinion, I will say that I am truly moved every time I walk around the square. On a normal winter day, I look into the windows of eateries and banks.

And now, it is thousands of protesters. A normal walk with my dog is becoming a historical moment. The progressive Madisonians and beyond are chanting various versions of "Walker is evil. He's no Badger." Other variations are "Walker is a weasel. Go home." Weasel or Evil, public employees, teachers, multitudes of union workers, and even toddlers are all over the capital with their signs.

Some people are walking up to the square with pillows and sleeping bags. I am guessing this is a 1960s type of situation. Will it make a difference as this proposed budget bill is aggressively trying to be pushed through legislation? What does this mean to me?

Well - again, I digress and I really don't feel like I can get into it (after all, this blog has my true identity and I am really "Janie Winston").

I will just say that I am moved by all of the people. Madison schools were closed today while all of the teachers were on the square protesting.

And here's another thought - all the local commerce down town is booming right now. Hotels look busy with protesters who want to stay down here, coffee shops are busier than usual and the restaurants and shops around the square are probably doing as well as they do on the Ironman weekend, Badger home games, and the such.

Maybe we need to do this more often. And, if the Egyptians could do it with Mubarak, maybe we can do it with Walker.

I made it without ranting. Let's just say we can agree to disagree.

What Are You Doing to Conserve Energy?

2011-02-09T18:30:00.002-06:00

I was in the shower last week when I read the side of my conditioner bottle. It said something like: “Please consider turning off the water while you condition your hair.” So, I thought about this. This is something I never thought to do before. I mentioned it to my boyfriend, Chris. He said he’s heard of it. So I said, “I am going to try it. I am going to turn off my water while I wash my hair and condition it. You don’t really need all that water.”

Today was the third morning in a row where I turned off my shower while lathering, shampooing, conditioning and shaving. And, I feel really good about it.

It’s the little stuff that makes life exciting.

I am conscious of turning off the water while scrubbing my hands, brushing my teeth and now, showering.

Tell me what you are doing to save money and the environment. And also – I challenge all of my readers. Please, please if just one of you tells me that you tried turning off the water in your shower while you washed your hair, you will make my week.

Snoop Dogg in Madison

2011-02-06T17:54:00.005-06:00

We had the "blizzard of 2011" and Snoop Dogg performed that night. The storm picked up around 5 PM on Tuesday, February 1st and by the time I woke up in the morning, the snow had stopped but there was a lot of it.

Walking to the show at the Orpheum, I knew it was not canceled and I was as excited as a kid in a candy store (no exageration). It was breezy, windy and snowy, but a short walk for me.

The show was scheduled to start at 8 PM. Christopher and I went to dinner next door at the Icon. We claimed our seats after dinner and had a beer. These weird dudes came out around 9 or so and sang a few songs, mostly about Madison. One of the guys didn't rap at all. He just walked around the stage and drank a beer. The other two did all the rapping. I am unclear on who the third dude was and why he was up on the stage at all.

Security was busy escorting drunks out and kicking people out of the aisles like they always do. While the marajuana smoke was thick, it is never addressed.

Back in the bathroom line for the second time, rumors were flying. Perhaps Warren G would make a guest appearance (that was my annoncement) while other people were trying to figure out where Snoop was and why it was taking so long. He might not come out until 11:30, said one girl.

While everyone waited for Snoop back up in the theater, Snoop videos were playing and people "booed" in between each song, disappointed that Snoop wasn't coming out. Finally, his emcee guy announced that Snoop was coming out any minute. "He's just finishing a blunt back stage."

Snoop came out in his hoodie and long hair and here's what he did, if I can recall names of songs:

Kush
Gin and Juice (very exciting!)
187 (I think)
That's That (I think)
Drop It Like It's Hot
I wanna Love You (I was so excited. I love AKON. However, he switched gears right in that verse about the pole dancing and he's watching, "bird eye view"....)
Sexual Eruption (Also very excited when this came on. He sernaded some girls from the audience who have Snoop tatoos)
Regulator (Warren G made his surprise guest appearance! I was right! The rumor I spread in the bathroom was true. Ironically, I had seen Warren G live at the Majestic in '09).
Jump Around
What's My Name

That's all I can remember. I will try to get some photos from my phone on here. It was a great show. He was only up there for an hour.

Madison is not known for being very diverse and I would say caucasians made up about 90% of the crowd. It was a sold out show and even with the blizzard, it was full. I heard some people got hotels near by.

I forgot my camera when I explored the aftermath of the 2011 blizzard the next day, but it's nothing you haven't all seen on your friend's facebook statuses, the national news, or your newspapers. It was a beautiful, sunny day with very deep snow. And it couldn't have worked out more perfectly. Because I got to sleep in and have a snow day after the S-N-double-O-P show.

A Rich Weekend in Madison

2011-01-30T17:29:00.007-06:00

I am so thankful for the concept of blogging. As a person who likes to talk, this has really worked out for me. I enjoyed hearing from friends who voiced their opinion on my last post and I plan to write about it again. The feminist movement still has a lot of growing to do.

I was thrilled this morning when I was thinking about the rich life that Madison has given me. As the weekend warmed up (you know, close to thirty degrees is warm), I was excited to spend my time outdoors. Wanting to stick to my "to do" list, I went cross country skiing yesterday (not a candlelight, but still - we finally have the powder I was asking for). While the Northeast has been slammed with more powdery stuff than they know what to do with, it seems like all we get is an inch of accumulation here and there.

Now, the excitement is that almost the entire country is going to be affected by this big storm coming this week. I am hoping for a blizzard. I just love it!

Anyways - I digress. As I was saying, Madison has offered me this rich life. I feel lucky to be able to have such a healthy, culturally enriching and active lifestyle in this little bubble.

An easy loop of cross country skiing was preceded with a nice trip to the dog park. The plan is to go again next Saturday, weather permitting. Madison has a lot of cross country skiing locations.

Today was another trip out to the dog park and a walk up and down the pedestrian only State Street. Here are my favorite shops in no particular order:

Pop Deluxe
Tellus Mater
Madison Sole (got the cutest bag there today)
Little Luxuries

State Street is two blocks from me. While I walk the dog up and down the street there about once a week, I never take myself (alone). The above mentioned stores are all local and therefore, we are keeping the dollar in our own community, people. (And why are you still shopping at Walmart? Oh right, so you can keep your neighbor's stores out of business and send your dollar overseas).

Anyways - enough about that.

The semi-annual Restaurant Week debuted last week. This was the fifth restaurant week since I have moved here and I have attended five times (shocker). For twenty-five dollars, you can do a prix-fixed, three course meal. We went back to Lombardino's (I can check that off my list) and were not disappointed. When I tell you that every meal I have had at restaurant week is out of this world, I am not lying. FYI - the majority of the restaurants have vegetarian options, besides the obvious steak/seafood places. Rich and thick butternut squash soup, truffled trumpet mushrooms with polenta and flourless chocolate cake topped off with a few glasses of red wine. It was fun and deliciously splendid. (p.s. - anything "truffled" is amazing).

I happen to make a pretty good flourless chocolate cake. And while I enjoyed theirs, I will have to post my recipe. Mine is less bitter and more rich.

There is never a dull moment or a lull in things to do around here. I am praying for a big blizzard with photos! We shall see.........

Post Feminist Movement?

2011-01-24T18:45:00.004-06:00

When I moved, I felt comfortable vocalizing about how sexist the cleaning product commercials were (are). I was about eight when I listened to Marlo Thomas rant about those ads, depicting happy women doing chores around the house. And that life lesson was from the seventies. And now it is a new millenium and those commercials have hardly changed. They haven't changed at all, come to think of it.

Watch any commercial refering to dinner, washing your floors, dusting, cleaning the shower, carpooling kids, laundering clothes, baking dessert - you get the hint. The star is always some happy lady.

Newsflash - I am not smiling when I am washing my floor. And any man friend/relative I am close with will also be spotted on their hands and knees, washing a floor. Or changing a diaper. Or baking a pie. My boyfriend cooks. So do my brothers-in-law. And my uncle and his son are the best cooks around. For dinner the other night, my brother-in-law made the entree. My sister made a side. My boyfriend made the salad. My mom and I made dessert. If you are a female slaving away, go on strike and find a modern man, my friend.

How come we have only come this far? The feminist movement came to some sort of halt in the 90s. It's like the feminist, post-modern era happened and my generation thinks the movement is over. But it's horrible. I consider myself very feminine. I am very much into my appearance. You don't have to look androgynous to play a part in this movement.

Who said pink is for girls and blue is for boys? I have decided that I will wait at least six weeks after my baby is born to tell anyone what the gender is in hopes that I don't get any "gender specific" (aka - sexist) looking items.

When you think of the noun "doctor," what do you think? When you think of the word "nurse," who do you see? Can you change that?

The wage gap between men and women still exists. Skinny, happy looking women are still starring in household cleaning commercials (while plenty of men do that job), men are representing scientists and researchers in magazine ads, and here it is, 2011.

If you are reading this and you dress your son in sports paraphanalia and wait on your husband, I want to know why. If you refuse to let your husband do laundry, cleaning, ironing (I don't even own an iron and you cannot tell), please advise. If you refer to yourself as "Mrs. Joe Smith," why?

If you let your son wear a pink shirt, I like you. If you are reading this while your male partner is making dinner, I like you (and him). If you are reading this and your male partner is cleaning/feeding/cooking/baking, I love you even more. And if you are a female and you still have your maiden name (you know - the one your parents gave you - I like you lots. Unless your partner had a really cool name - like an Irish one.) And, if you are a man and you took your wife's last name - I totally approve.

So as I read "Sexual Enlightenment," let me preach that while some things have changed for us women, a lot has not. Even here in my little bubble of Liberal Madison.

Eating Right

2011-01-16T10:02:00.005-06:00

After my experimenting, I know that I can (thank God) eat my much loved dairy. However dull veganism sounds to people who are carnivores, to vegetarians, it sounds manageable. And truthfully, it was. Especially in a town like Madison where I was able to find vegan food at the grocery stores I frequent and the restaurant selections, too.

I was hoping to check out The Green Owl Cafe, and I was happy to go there while eliminating dairy. The vegan chocolate cake was the highlight of my dining experience there. Although, the entree was tasty, as well. My vegan dish resembled an eggplant cutlet (yum) and I don't like eating lots of fake meat. The sides (green beans and potatoes) were fresh and real.

Speaking of fake meat, I HATE fake food and learned that any fake food I eat irritates my stomach. Fake food is any product you see at the grocery store that has a million ingredients including (but not limited to): artificial flavors, dextrin, bleached noodles (ie "enriched macaroni), partially hydrogenated soybean oil (ie - you are eating food that has hydrogen added to it so it can sit on the shelf for a long ass time), ammonium sulfate, and any word that you are unable to pronounce. The general rule is if you cannot pronounce it, do not eat it.

A lot of these chemicals have been found to cause heart disease and cancer, among many other health conditions.

The best thing to remember to feel good and stay healthy is to eat how they did in the olden days. Basic fruits, grains and vegetables. For those who claim that "it's cheaper to buy those hamburger helper type of items," I would say, if you eat a lot of that garbage, it's going to cost you your health. I would rather stick around for awhile.

While working on my Madison list of "to dos" I have gone to Plan B and went to the farm in Spring Green, but we have not had the appropriate powdery snow for cross country skiing or snow shoeing. Walking and hiking has been all I have been able to do this winter. I am disappointed in our lack of heavy snowfall. We are historically behind. I am hoping for some tomorrow to help this situation, enabling me to get some cross country skiing in. And next week is the start of restaurant week.

Do I see some snow and Lombardino's in my future?

Stomach Woes and Winter Wants

2011-01-02T21:37:00.005-06:00

I hope everyone had a good Christmas and New Year. There are a lot of changes going on in Madison and while I hesitate to voice my political concern here, I will just say that the majority of Madison proper residents were disappointed with the election results. (Just google it)

Although I am not a resolution kind of person, I learned that I will be making some changes, after a trip to urgent care. Having felt sick for the past six months with various bouts of stomach issues, colds, glucose problems and the such, it looks like I have a diagnosis. For now, I am a vegan.... we will see how long this has to last. (I am not lactose intelorant).

And after three days of going "vegan," I am happy to report that my stomach finally feels right. This is not something I chose, but it's easy enough right now because I don't want to suffer. And now I totally get why my celiac friend is always soooo cautious. The repercussions aren't worth it. Let me tell you.

This was probably onset by mild depression/anxiety. I have had a little depression for over ten years. Running has curved it a lot, but evidently, not enough. At first, I thought to myself, "it's time to move again" (joke).

And in other news, I did have the opportunity to see Madison Ballet's "The Nutcracker," the day after Christmas with my boyfriend. After going with my mom a number of times in Cleveland (before the Cleveland Ballet went defunct due to money problems,) it was nice to see a different ballet perform the holiday performance. The scenery was nice and the dancing was ok. They had a zillion local dance studios with little children incorporated into the production. It was cute, but didn't look exactly "professional" with all the rugrats on stage. It was still enjoyable. And I can't complain when the theater is across the street. I contemplated running home at intermission to grab a snack.

We had seen "Black Swan" the night before, so we had a ballet filled weekend. Creepy, but the dancing was actually better than the live performance I saw (sorry!)

There is a lot to do still, but I have to recover from my stomach problems first.

Here is my "Wisconsin Winter To Do List:"

1. Go to one of the candlelight cross country skiing courses.
2. Go to my aunt and uncle's farmhouse in Spring Green for the day for some snow shoeing.
3. Go to Restaurant Week (Lombardinos or Osteria).
4. Visit Princeton, Wisconsin.
5. Go dancing at Plan B (it's been too long).

And I guess I should add that I hope everyone has a healthy new year and new beginnings. I know it was a hard year for a lot of people I am close to. Keep your attitude up and remember - go to therapy!

Taking Control of Your Life

2010-12-26T10:33:00.003-06:00

This week, I worked and spent a fair amount of time outside. I end up walking a lot in the snow. And I especially love snow storms. Madison does not get lake effect snow like Cleveland, but we get a lot of snow like Cleveland. (I still laugh to myself when I think about the Clevelanders who asked me why I was going to a snowy place.... that's like asking someone from Scottsdale why they are moving to Miami..) I am used to the cold climate and fortunately, like it a lot. For those who complain to me, I have recently started responding, "Then why do you live here?" My most recent answers:

1) My parents raised me here (um - so move?)
2) It's warmer than Minnesota, where I am from. (I liked this answer better)

And this brings me to the topic of:

If you are unhappy, why aren't you doing anything about it?

Is it because you don't realize you can? Or is the average American not motivated enough to make a change?

I hated my work. I changed jobs. I hated Boston. I moved. I saw I loved Madison. So I moved here. I wasn't getting along with my boyfriend. I broke up with him. I wanted to express myself. I started a blog. I wanted to improve my attitude. I went to therapy. I wanted to feel good again. I started running.

I have a lot of areas I can say I haven't worked on. But why do Americans love to bitch about things for twenty years without doing anything about it?

It seems that people are happy being unhappy. You can complain about your awful job all you want. But remember, you are in control of your life. And it is up to you to do something about it. So do it. You are not victims (with the small exception of being a victim of the economy....)

I know so many people who stay in long, boring relationships or cities - or whatever. But to me, the sky is the limit. Life is so much more exciting knowing that I am not stuck. Everything changes. And life is too short to stay living with someone if you see potential in something else. I often wonder if people who married young did that because they just thought it was the right thing to do. Cause nobody stays married any more.

For me, it was literally hard to leave Madison on my last visit before I moved here. I felt like I didn't go everywhere and do everything I wanted to. Because, in order to do that, I would need to spend an extended period of time here (like live here) to do it. So, that was my final deciding factor. It was hard to leave. So I am here.

If you are going to bitch about your weather or your lover. Why don't you get out? WHY?! I just don't get it. Be proactive and take countrol of your life. It's exciting.

Restaurant Number Five on the Square

2010-12-19T21:29:00.003-06:00

After a very warm and pleasant getaway to Turks and Caicos, I am back in Madison for a while. And I am happy to be here and experience it. There is so much to do in town this winter, so my plan is to take it all in.

There are a number of new restaurants on and around the square. L'Etoile moved, Graze opened, the Old Fashioned expanded, the Underground Kitchen, Nostrano, Francesca and now - Merchant Madison. I was very excited about it. I tried to check on the progress of it every time I passed by with the dog. And it opened this past week!

Excited to check it out, some friends and I went there last night for drinks/munchies. I wasn't that hungry on my way there, but after about fifteen minutes, my dinner bell was ringing. (I am one of those people who can't go very long without food when I am hungry).

My understanding of this new joint is that they want to have a casual breakfast and lunch and an upscale dinner with "crafty" drinks. They also want to sell some gourmet foods on their shelves.

So - let me put it this way. If I am shopping for something gourmet in a pinch, I am going to walk over to the very much loved fromagination around the corner to buy some Potter's Crackers, spiced nuts, etc. I don't know what Merchant Market is thinking about their gourmet selection. Umm - the last time I checked, I could get Heinz Ketchup, Nutella, Sriracha Sauce and even "gourmet" noodles at the cheap college grocery store across the street. I love the experience of a nice market. So, if they want to do that, I recommend they look at what Fox & Obel is selling and go after products like that.

The atmosphere was nice - it is very large. I am pretty sure the space was previously an office. It's a fun environment and it wasn't busy for their debut Saturday night. It was very cold - temperature wise. I cut them some slack, though because it was like three degrees outside.

The drink menu looks fun. These are some "crafty" drinks. I had a "bonfire" something or other which included tequila and a lot of other things (maybe something with mango?) and a nice lemon garnish. All of these cocktails are around $9.00 and unfortunately, I am going to be mean and say they are much better and cheaper at Fresco. Especially when you can do the Fresco $5 menu. My friends tried other specialty drinks and weren't that excited, either.

We had a few appetizers which were tasty, but I hope you aren't hungry because they did the same thing that I have been experiencing quite a lot lately - they used a large plate to put little cheeses and crackers and the such on display. If I was hosting a party, I would be embarrassed to serve this stuff. It looked like nothing on this giant plate. The apple was probably 1/6 of an apple and the crumbled nuts were probably literally 4 peanuts chopped up. It was all good, but too small. Ok - so enough is enough. I feel bad being so critical, so the main thing here is that the portions are small (we got some other things) but the food was ok.

They boasted about their sustainable and localness like every other place on the square, which is great - don't get me wrong.

Server was nice and friendly. The drinks took forever, but they just opened, so again, no sweat. All in all - too expensive for drinks/dinner, portions need to be bulked up and they need to restock their shelves.

After that, we headed to Cooper's Tavern - a great place that is so close to my home, I could walk there in my sleep. Plus, the poutine filled us up. So bad for you, yet so good. The free round of drinks didn't hurt, either.

Next, I am heading back to Nostrano and the Underground Kitchen.

What I Really Want to Blog About

2010-12-05T21:14:00.004-06:00

Sometimes, I ponder where I am going to take my blog. Or what to write about. A lot of times, I want to write about really horribly opionated things that I bring up with people and think to myself, "I should blog about that." However, a lot of the time, I feel that it is just too inappropriate unless I start a new unanonymous blog. Which has also crossed my mind. But I don't think I will do.

I would love to blog about things like:

Affairs
Walmart
Horribly over-consuming Americans
My recent political issues
Personal stories of breaking-up and getting back together

Just to name a few. But, as little kids like to say a lot, "I can't."

So - maybe I will just touch on them in a real appropriate way.

Affairs - too much to say on this topic. I think they happen a lot. Humans used to die at the age of forty. So, twenty years of marriage was manageable. I am still quite skeptical of the whole insitution of marriage and I am ok with that. I guess that's something I am supposed to be working on in therapy.

Walmart - Do you like picturing your toddlers (you know, the ones you can't believe are three years old today on your facebook statuses) working a twelve hour shift to make a pair of cheap socks for the overconsuming American who has 76 pairs of socks as it is? (including holiday themed ones, birthday socks and more....)

So, I just touched on the overconsumer problem.

Political issues - I am keeping my mouth shut here. Feel free to share your opinions. Something I did learn over the weekend from a source who is friends/family with a number of soldiers: When coming back from Iraq, they do not want to hear random strangers thanking them as they travel through the airports and on the plane. They just want to get home. (Interesting, isn't it?)

Breaking up and getting back together - I would love to share some funny stories. But I will tell you one thing. When asked one time by a male friend how you are able to date in Madison without running into another person you are dating, I confirmed that "you can't." Maybe not unless you went to dinner in Milwaukee.

And that, my friends, is what I (sort of) want to blog about. A lot of the time.

The Underground Dinner

2010-11-29T21:34:00.004-06:00

Everyone was sad when Cafe Montmatre on E. Mifflin closed. My relationship with the restaurant was short and sweet. Having been introduced at my brother-in-law and sister's wedding brunch, I liked the atmosphere and the food.

Flash forward to 2008 and I was new to Madison and invited to hear some music there on a Saturday night. As fun, young people came in and everyone danced the night away, I liked the venue.

I met friends there during several snowy storms and it felt cozy. And of course, what's not bad about being able to walk there? They had this great $5 pizza night. The bar was great. I guess things just got tough and then they closed.

Now we always heard of Underground Kitchen. The "collective" group who have catered numerous events around town. No owner. No head chef. They cooked up wonderful breakfasts at the indoor farmer's market. Well, now they are in Cafe Montmatre's space. And it is good.

Having checked it out through the windows numerous nights as I walk by with my dog, I have been very anxious to try it out. It always appeared busy as I peaked through the glass, everyone inside looked like someone I would be friends with (yes, there are also older people who dine there. I would want to be their friend, too)and the bar looked happening.

So, last Tuesday night, I did my walk by and it was busy. So I texted my bf and met him there. The only table they could give us was right by the door and it was cold. But we didn't care. I think they are working on getting something to prevent the cold air from coming in (actually, I believe the host said they are changing the entrance to the other door), but really, it was a non issue. It was busy.

I will note here that my dad taught us when we were young to always try and prevent cold air from blowing into a restaurant. For example, if there is a breezeway between two doors, wait until the first door is closed before you open the second. I think this is very thoughtful.

Back to Underground.... Our server was not your typical server. She was not outgoing. No extrovert here. She seemed more like a scientist than a sociologist. But she did know the menu quite well. We decided to try the polenta fries with homemade squash ketchup, romanesco & leeks in cream and the orecchiette as an entree. The appetizers were absolutely tasteful. I highly recommend the romanesco and leeks in the creamy stuff. I believe they also had some breadcrumbs. Romanesco is in the broccoli family, so you should be open to that type of vegetable. The dipping sauce (squash stuff) with the polenta fries was excellent. And the entree was our least favorite, but we were pretty stuffed. We each had a drink (I had a red blend, he had a beer). Our total was about $34.00 and the desserts sounded delicious, we were just too stuffed.

The atmosphere is great. I like the wood floors, the nice tables, it's brighter than it used to be, but still has that warm feel. The festive large squash decorations by the front door helped.

One thing I read before going there is that because they have an open kitchen (yeah -you can see them doing everything), your clothes smell. This is somewhat true, but it didn't bother me. Also, I think there is a communal table there, but we didn't sit on that side of the restaurant.

All in all, I loved the food (the usual - local and sustainable) and I loved the atmosphere. So I will be spending some more time there. I am very excited for the first big snow fall so I can get all of my friends there on a stormy night for some good food and drink.

Gender Identity

2010-11-08T20:26:00.004-06:00

And here is my latest argument. Lately, I have been thinking a lot about gender identification. I know there have been a lot of experiments and research performed on this topic.

I could go on about this for a while. But, my main issue right now is the color coding. If I currently had a little boy or girl, I would love to do my own little experiment.

Dress your toddler in some gender neutral clothes (say a little girl in some brown/black/green) and they are automatically called "he."

Our mother was pretty much against the pink for girls and blue for boys rule. There are a few people she made exceptions for. And that's how we were raised.

A friend of the family raised her two daughters quite differently. Daughter A was during the hippie movement. She was dressed in gender neutral clothes. She is an engineer who doesn't shave her legs. Daughter B was after the hippie movement. Mom started wearing make-up, watching her figure and maintaining her own appearance. Daughter B is a make-up wearing, nail polishing, skinny, little, feminine and sexy thing.

It is interesting, isn't it?

I am not sure where the color coding came from. Looking at art, I presume it started centuries ago.

But why not let your kids decide how masculine or feminine they want to be? My niece wears a lot of boy hand-me-downs. And I think Americans are over consuming in their need to buy more and more things (like clothes for younger children of a different gender, when their older sibling of the opposite sex has perfectly fine used clothes). And so, little niece doesn't want to wear anything in her hair. And when offered to wear a barrette to pull back some hair from her face, she rejects. Well, how about if her role model, the older brother wears it? Ok, now she will gladly wear one, too! And see, it's not about what is for a boy or what is for a girl. She wants to be just like him.

And with that being said, it is fine with me if my son wants to wear his hair in a clip because the girl down the street is doing it. He will figure out what is "masculine." And I always liked that my little cousin (although quite macho) would wear a dress during playtime. He is from Madison. How many boys will do that?

And the last thing I will say is if I have a baby (although I always sit with the laptop on my lap, which supposedly reduces your chances, so it's unlikely), please do NOT buy me blue things with sports logos on it for my son or pink ruffled things for my daughter. It's sexist!

The Newest Restaurant Review in Madison.....

2010-11-07T17:19:00.004-06:00

I recently went to a new restaurant off the square, called Nostranos. It is located in the old Peppino's across from Gennas. Nostranos was delicious.

Opened by a young couple from Chicago, the restaurant is not cheap. The atmosphere is lovely. My boyfriend took me here for a celebration dinner, which was very nice of him. We ordered an appetizer salad, (called Farm Egg Salad - not what you are thinking), entrees (I had the Delicata Squash Cannelloni and it was fabulous) and a dessert. Nothing is large enough or filling enough, but the food is excellent. No surprise, the food is prepared with local ingredients, etc, etc. The menu is on the Italian side.

We waited a really long time for our food. Fortunately, having just been to Paris, where you can wait an eternity for any service, we didn't mind at all. In fact, I don't think a lot of Madisonians mind waiting.

The portions were just too small. The entrees are served on large plates. They either need to:
A) Use smaller plates or
B) Add some big side dish to fill their plates. This is easy to do with a cheap vegetable (potatoes or kale?) with some good seasoning.

Now, as I note some vegetables, it seems the only local vegetables you can get right now are squashes, which is fine. Tonight, I am going to prepare a parsnip and apple mash. (From a recipe I got out of Martha's magazine when I was having my gray hair colored). I recently bought delicata squash from the market and it was one of the tastiest squashes I have had.

The next restaurant I would like to try to is Underground Kitchen in the old Montmatre space. I have done several walk bys with my dog and it looks fun in there. I hear they change their menu a lot and there are several community tables. Underground was known as a catering business. It has a locally sourced menu, blah, blah, blah.

We have too many good restaurants here. I am so spoiled. (And glad I moved here). Especially because I can walk to a lot of them.

Back to My Favorite Time

2010-10-21T19:42:00.001-05:00

Well, it's that time of year again: Fall. I love this time. We have great foliage here in Madison. I try very hard not to let it pass too quickly.

After missing the beggining of autumn, I am happy to be back in my town. I am literally thrilled.

So, for those of you who don't know, after the whirlwind ten days of traveling to Europe, I was home for about seventy-two(?) hours. I wasn't feeling well and I have no idea how the president does it. I was exhausted.

Back on a plane and headed to Cali, I was standing up in my dear friend's wedding. I was honored to be asked and it was a great time. Actually, a changing time for me. I have mixed feelings about weddings - but that's for another post.

(*NOTE - I am hitting my limit of wedding parties. I will do two more in the next ten years - so I may say "no" to you..., take it as a compliment)

And so, after seeing one of the most beautiful parts of the country,it was time to take my very first red eye. I thought I was a rockstar when I told everyone I was going to work as soon as I drove home from my redeye. As I sat in my claustrophobic seat on the plane, I contemplated squeezing a run in before I hit the office (I am so anal about my running).

And as I started to feel sick and lightheaded, I decided to slowly get up to ask the flight attendant for a gingerale. But I never made it there. Because I fainted in the aisle. And that, ladies and gentleman, was my first experience fainting.

It's not so scary and I actually felt better after I came to. Do you know that feeling before you throw up? And then after, you feel better? That's how I felt after fainting.

Needless to say, even though I still wanted to go to work, I hadn't slept in over twenty-four hours, for the third night in two weeks and was awake for about three hours the rest of that day. Oh well. I tried.

I read three books while traveling. They were all good. The laugh-out-loud book was Wally Lamb's (She's Come Undone, I Know this Much is True), latest little fiction, "Wishin' and Hopin'. It's a page turner (my favorite kind).

I also was convinced to read Twilight and I must say - it's good.

And now, I am "wishin' and hopin'" to stay put in Madison for a long, long time.

Having a Ball in Paris

2010-10-04T19:05:00.007-05:00

After spending nine days in Paris with a brief stop in Madison, I am trying to bang out everything (you know, packing, unpacking, laundry, getting in a normal time zone, finding a dog sitter, you get the hint)..... including a posting on my travels to Paris. This is going to be a long one.

My favorite part of going on a vacation is taking a vacation away from all technology. Phones. Text. Internet, etc.

Paris is a wonderfully beautiful city, rich with architecture. There is a lot to fit in in nine days. Somehow, I did it all.

When you think about all of your classroom experiences, from elementary and beyond, you actually get to see all those photos up close and personal in Paris.

Here is what I did:

Jardin de Luxembourg (Famous Garden)
Notre Dame (You know)
Left Bank Walk (A nice stroll on the left bank, including a stop at a lovely old bookstore).
D'orsay (Lots of impressionism, fabulous building)
Rodin (The Thinker)
The Louvre (Mona Lisa)
Arc de Triomphe (The arch you see when you picture the giant rotary)
River Cruise on the Siene
Galleries Lafyette Department Store Rooftop (Has great city views)
Place Des Vosges
Pompidou (Modern Art Museum)
Giverny (Monet's house/gardens)
Sacre-Coeur (Beautiful Catholic Church on a hill)
Cluny (Renaissance/Tapestry)
Deportation Memorial (Where the Jewish people were lead when the Germans invaded)
Victor Hugo's Apartment
Le Cordon Bleu (Julia Child)
Eiffel Tour (The star of Paris)
I am sure I am forgetting something here, but I am slightly overwhelmed with where to start.

If you are planning a trip to Paris, I highly recommend Rick Steves' guidebook. It is extremely helpful.

Having been to the french country as a teenager, this was my first time in the big city. Like any big city, it is overcrowded, loud and busy. Everything in Paris is smaller. They can easily cram six bistro tables with chairs into what we would consider the size of a small closet. Us Americans - we have too much stuff.

They aren't rude. They didn't "force" me to speak their language. Although, enough french came back to me to get by without a problem. They don't ever serve water unless you ask for it and once your glass is empty, you're done. Bring lots of water with you when you are out for the day.

And speaking of being "out" for the day, you need to be in excellent physical shape for a trip to Paris. In order to really experience all of the sites, you walk about five miles a day. This includes a ton of stairs.

I am not just talking about stairs. I am talking you are at the bottom and you cannot see the top. At all. March to the top of the Arc de Triomphe (284 steps) or the Notre Dame (402 steps) or the apartment I stayed in (five flights). You will know who is American there because they are the ones who stop in between steps, huffing and puffing. These are shallow steps. Narrow, sometimes claustrophobic and winding.

I did my research on running in Paris. I came to the conclusion based on my studies that they don't run. This is false. There are more runners in Paris than in other cities I have visited, but there aren't a ton, like Madison. The best thing to do is to find a nearby park and do loops in there. Running on their streets is difficult because of the people who have absolutely no desire to get out of your way which leads to lots of "Pardon!"

Now - for the sites, I recommend all of them. I would say the Cluny was my least favorite, yet still interesting. The tapestries were nice and it lacks the popularity of some of the others which is nice, when you want to do something a little quieter.

I loved the river cruise. Bundle up because it is cold on a fall night on the Siene River. You have great views of a lot of their historical buildings and the tour guide was informative. Go after dark.

Notre Dame was a grand church. What blew me away when I walked through there was that it has held up remarkably well. As you climb the 400+ stairs, crowded with people behind and in front, you wonder how it is possible that this structure is still standing and how it is possible that the stairs don't just crumble from under. I felt that way running up to the Arc de Triomphe as well. (By the way, there really were hunchbacks and you will know why...)

From afar, Socre Coeur looks so close. But it is so far away. The Eiffel Tower has the same effect.

The first time I saw the Eiffel Tower, I was blown away. I get star struck and the Tower is the celebrity of this city. It has an overbearing, empowered presence. It is surreal until you get close. Take the metro stop to the Trocadero and you will have the best view of it. When you are close enough, you can actually see camera flashes from the second floor and the top. The rickety sounding elevator can be intimidating and I insisted on going to the top. People will tell you it is scary. The elevator ride is slightly worry some. You feel like you are dangling and can free fall at any moment. The top is amazing. And there is a small apartment at the top with a recreation of Mr. Eiffel, his daughter and Ben Franklin. (I believe it was his office).

I was glad to have seen the art exhibit at the Cleveland Art Museum a few months ago, which featured some of the history of the tower.

The D'orsay is great, too. The building was an old train station. Currently under construction, I think some of the paintings are moved around. There is a ton of Degas, Monet, Van Gogh, etc.

The Rodin has the great garden with the famous Thinker. The Louvre is completely gigantic and overwhelming. There are a zillion people there and poor Mona Lisa has a million cameras in her face all the live long day (guilty!)

The highlight of the trip was taking a day to go to Giverny. It was about an hour away from the big city. It was a lovely day. Sunny. Beautiful. Peaceful. And you could actually hear the birds chirping. I was pleased. Go to lunch at the restaurant on his property. The food was good and it reminded me of a "ladies lunch" kind of place.

There is something so mystical about being in his garden. My photos of the lily pads and the weeping willows look like his paintings to me. It is magic. I will always look at his paintings in a different and special way now.

His house is incredible, as well. I loved the room he used to paint in. If you get to Paris, definitely take a trip to Giverny. (I had no interest in Versailles).

As for the food - it was all delicious. I recommend a Creperie place called Creperie Suzette. And I loved Angelina's for a nice cup of hot chocolate. They are famous for it and the line is worth it. It is like drinking a candy bar.

I even got to sit in on a class at Le Cordon Bleu. Yes, there are some pictures of Julia, Giada, Meryl Streep and more. My understanding is that Parisians don't really know much about the school. A lot of Americans go there. It appears that a lot of Asians do, as well.

Up next: Carmel-by-the-Sea!

A Bientot!

The Restaurant Scene in Madison

2010-09-23T18:30:00.000-05:00

I am leaving for Paris tomorrow and I want to get out a posting before I go. I will be out of touch for a while.

I refer to Madison's square a lot. When I walk around it, whether it is for a little stroll with the dog or to get somewhere, I am always interested in the commerce around there. I love watching the progress of restaurants as they prepare for their openings.

Here is my latest observation:

Graze is doing well. I recommend it to anyone. Their brunch is superb - I had a chocolate french toast dish (I believe it was sandwiched with nutella). The lunch was amazing - homemade beet veggie burger. (I love beets). Even their lemonade is worth the visit. The best lemonade I have had - no exaggeration. I have only been there for drinks in the evening. I snacked on the truffle oil popcorn and it was delish. Tory Miller, (best) chef and owner said that a lot of people do not realize that everything is homemade - including bread (and I would even guess their butter).

Tory is a chef who you can spot regularly at the farmer's market, shopping for a chunk of ingredients that you will eat at his establishment. What's cooler than seeing a top chef walk through his restaurant with a wagon full of farmer's market produce?

Also in the news, Restaurant Magnus, a classy joint off the square has made a big announcement. They are closing and turning into a casual restaurant that will be "biker friendly." I guess bikers who like to stop for a bite will pull over and stop at the new place. It is closing in January.

Cafe Continental, also a tasty restaurant on King Street will be closing. The family who owns it has been in the business since 1933. Muramoto's group will open it at some point, calling it "43 North". (Love these short names!) It will be the first place the group is opening that will be non-Asian.

I read about nine months ago that a young couple from Chicago is opening a new place in the old Peppino's spot off the square. When asking a valid source, he said that they are opening it - very slowly.

The other interesting looking storefront is the market across from Marigold. It claims it will be a gourmet, down town market with some sort of martini or wine bar? My valid source said he thinks that store will be "a risk" and he also said it is slowly moving forward.

The Infamous Bike Rack Posting

2010-09-19T09:38:00.008-05:00

Way back when, I asked for you to send me a photo of a bike rack in your city.

Before I moved to Madison, it appeared to be very biker/runner friendly. Some enthusiasts disagree with me. Compared to what I was used to, it was/is a dream come true for my early morning running routine.

In Madison, I was overjoyed with the bike racks, overflowing with bikes. I would point out to my new friends that other cities have bare racks all over. I even told the story about the woman who didn't know what the bike rack on the car was.

I thought to myself, "How about if people share their bike racks to demonstrate the popularity of bike riding in Madison, Wisconsin?"

I have a very poor sample. Having studied quantitative methods, this is not a research project. But here it is.

Enjoy your photos.

You Know You're Generation Y....

2010-09-15T22:37:00.004-05:00

When I first moved here, I noticed a lot of Subarus, NYT dog poop bags, market goers.... Now - well, that's just Madison.

However, as I mentioned about Madison a few years ago, there are a lot of things that go on in here (and within the Generation Y culture) that others "just don't get:"

1) Hating Walmart

2) Staying in boutique hotels

3) Shopping locally

4) Photographing food and uploading it onto your blog/facebook/tweeting about it

5) Anti Child producing (aka having kids)

6) Having a blog

7) Discussing and digesting the restaurant scene

8) Reading the "NYT" and consistently uploading it onto your blog/facebook/twitter account

9) Moving to New York or Chicago (evidently, those are the only two cities in the entire United States of America that are "cool")

10) Watching "Mad Men" or "Dexter"

11) Making a dinner from scratch

12) Sharing a CSA

13) Biking to work

And I just described myself minus #4, #9, #10, #12 and #13... (Ok, so I am half way there)....

Thoughts?

The Square that is Madison

2010-09-13T19:19:00.003-05:00

Every weekend, the square is converted into an activity. While Lance Armstrong was on the square two weeks ago, one week ago, Lisa Loeb performed (totally unbeknownst to me, found out after)and yesterday - the Ironman.

Every Labor Day weekend, Madison has an annual event that I like to call, "The Taste of the United States of America." Madison, I am ashamed. While our local restaurants do incredibly well in this little city, the "taste" includes Little Caesers, Panchero's, and more places that I haven't been to since college. But, it does also include some Madison favorites. It brings in people from I am not even sure where... and down town is as congested as a Badger home game Saturday.

And yesterday, thousands of people gathered down town to watch those athletes who want to do the ultimate challenge: the Ironman. (My sister has accused me of being a delinquent blogger and said she is sure she will read about how the Ironman should be called the "Ironperson" in my next posting.... she knows me too well).

This competition is truly an unbelievable act. And an inspiration to watch. As I have mentioned before, races are very emotional for me to watch. When I greeted a friend who had a wonderful support system of spectateurs after her most incredible accomplishment, I was able to tell her how proud I was of her. Something that never comes out of my mouth naturally. Completing an ironman is something that just seems unattainable to me - I jealously admit that. But I will never do it.

Every time I watch a marathon (or the Madison Ironman,) I think to myself,
"maybe I will do another marathon.... nah!"

The one piece of advice I will give you if you are training, whether it is for an ironman or a marathon, having a great support system during your training and at the event is key.

For more running tips and sticking with your routine, e-mail me.

The French Impact in Madison

2010-08-30T22:23:00.003-05:00

As I traveled to Montreal in the cold season, I thought about the need to desperately brush up on my french. I don't know how good my french was when I studied it. I do know this: I really loved that class. My Parisian teacher commented to my parents in my report card back in 1997 or 1998 that I had a lot of enthusiasm for the language.

Let me start by telling you the most exciting thing that happened in Madison this weekend (which has something to do with France). I have blogged several times about Madison's Ride the Drive. I mentioned a special someone who was coming to promote it. The seven time winning Tour De France winner, Lance Armstrong was here! See my photos!! (I get star struck really easily.) I planted myself in a great spot to catch a glimpse, but didn't get any really good photos of him.

As I said, I am bike-a-phobic, but Dad and I walked a lot of the route in 88 degrees with my big, old, furry and hot golden retriever.

I am excited about the prospect of turning the city into an even "more" biker friendly place, which I hope will in turn put me more at ease about biking places. I just walk everywhere. I should probably work on overcoming my PTSD.

And back to my "Frenchy" tales, there is a fabulous little hidden gem on Mineral Point Road called "La Baguette." It is owned by a French couple and I believe they have an imported oven from France, but I have not looked up my sources. They play french music and have some french magazines. Sitting in the store, you feel exposed to the culture, but you don't feel like you are actually in France. (If you close your eyes, you would certainly feel like you were there). If you are a foodie, go there for lunch. You can at least look at photos of Sarkozy and his gorgeous wife in an outdated French magazine.

And then, on to my french speaking. Or lack of it. I finally attempted a "Cafe & Conversation," about two blocks from my condo. And before I left the crowd of french speakers, I announced, "I am screwed." I don't remember much but I will survive in France with my cute new walking shoes, plethora of scarves, dark hair and small build. Vraiment?

Now I'm Inside - Mish Mosh

2010-08-25T21:56:00.005-05:00

Two years of blogging already. (I can't believe it! - one of my pet peeves. I can totally believe it because if I told you how much I have done since I started - well, even my sisters don't know all the dirty details.....)

Every time I walk the dog, I witness someone on a bike who always looks like they are about to get hit.

I am so excited for fall. I have been excited for it all summer. These long days with the sun out are killing me. I feel obligated to be outside until sunset.

Did you ever have that "exhausted" feeling after spending all day at the swimming pool when you were a kid? I am so anal, I try to recreate that feeling as an adult. I run four miles, lift weights, then go swimming to feel that "exhaustion" I felt from my child.

Just like I carve my pumpkins and decorate with this fall theme to remind me of my memorable childhood. Which is probably why I love this time of year that is just around the corner.

And Christmas time - love it. Have you ever walked around New York City or Chicago during the holidays? What a majestic time! Love the store windows. Walking around a museum and then sitting in a coffee shop with a hot chocolate drink - ideal Saturday afternoon.

And soon, I am going to Paris. I am lucky. I feel so blessed.

Sunday, Madison has a second "Ride the Drive." My golden and I are walking it with our Dad. Lance Armstrong leads the way. This should be part of Dad's training. Maybe he will start a blog about it......

On Wisconsin!

2010-08-22T20:49:00.006-05:00

Only in Madison do you meet a little girl who says to you at a coffee shop, "I knew that local toy store around the corner would have ugly dolls because it's not a big chain store." Where do kids get this stuff? I was impressed.

And so, a weekend of debating what to do, yet again. Gay pride, mini-marathon, new children's museum, and more. Well, everyone who knows me will be shocked to learn that I went to the Corn Festival in Sun Prairie. I didn't exactly fit in, but that doesn't matter. $1.00 gets you in and the rest is carnival games, food, a petting zoo and watching glutenous people. For $6.00, you can purchase a small, cardboard tub and then you enter the corn area....

Walk into this area, people load up as much corn as you can fit into your "tub," and then husk it yourself at a "husking station." Have it buttered by some young girls with gloves. Salt it with the "salt tree." A tree with what looks like clothes lines with salt shakers dangling on them. I had two. My friend had six. And the ninth was thrown out. Sorry.

The highlight of the corn feast was holding a yellow lab puppy at the petting zoo area.

You would have to live under a rock to miss the new Children's Museum that just opened opposite the square from my condo. It has received a ton of publicity and it looks awesome. So, I checked it out. A "human" hamster wheel, chickens on the rooftop and some of the best views of Madison are appealing to adults (and children). You would not know we are in a recession visiting this museum. (Also an interesting story about the design above the elevator on the rooftop).

I just made a good recipe I hadn't made in a while. Having purchased an eggplant for $1.00 yesterday at the market and basil for .$50, I made my "eggplant sandwiches" (No bread included. Just breadcrumbs). E-mail me for the recipe.

I suppose I am ready for my bike posting. If anyone else has a bike rack picture.... Send now or never. Thanks.

What's in a Name?

2010-08-15T21:32:00.005-05:00

I am always thinking about names. It's hard to name a child something that isn't already used by many others. And you don't want to make something up either. My child is my dog.

When I named her "Scout," I thought it was creative. Based on the young character in the classic, "To Kill a Mockingbird," I was pretty sure I had named my dog like no other dog owner before me. And boy, was I wrong.

In the past year, my building has housed three Scouts. Two of them golden retrievers.

You can always find it irritating when people don't "get" your name. I have been called an exuberant number of different names when introducing myself. From Janeanne to Janice to Amy and beyond. That's why I finally figured out if I say, "Janie like Janie's got a gun by Aerosmith", that seems to work.

Now, for Scout, I get a lot of "whats?" I have tried the "From To Kill a Mockingbird," but disappointingly enough, in the nine years I have had her, there have been too many times when people let me down by indicating that they have no clue what I am talking about. (And not everyone knows Aerosmith, either. But that's ok). So instead, I say "Scout. She's my girlscout." That clears it up.

So, many years ago, I determined a "Man Quiz." When flirting or on a date with a guy, if I tell him my dog's name and he replies, "Oh, did you get that from To Kill a Mockingbird?" he has passed one of my IQ tests. (There are about four. That's for another posting).

Through the years, it is mildly mind boggling that so many people do not know classic literature. And when a couple arrived at our regular dog park and introduced "Franny," their black lab, I asked if they were Salinger fans. They were. And as we discussed Holden Caufield, Nine Stories and his recent death, the Chicago couple told me there was a Zooey canine down the street from their old house in Chicago. They said when they met the dog, they replied, "This is Franny!" and the neighbors with Zooey were like, "Yeah?" "They didn't know the novel," they told me. "Who doesn't know Salinger?!" I gasped. (I am glad my parents kept three or four of his books in our basement which I read one summer). I am also glad that I go to a well-read dog park where we name our dogs after fictional characters from well known authors.

And on that note, my aunt and uncle just told me that their grandson's middle name is Rhett and it only makes them think of Rhett Butler. About a week later, I met a young guy who introduced himself to me as "Rhett, like Rhett Butler." "I bet you haven't heard that you're entire life," I said to him facetiously. "Yeah, right," he joked back.

Patience and Stuff

2010-08-10T20:09:00.006-05:00

The first article I read this morning was about the flight attendant who lost his temper. It sounds like something a lot of disgruntled employees dream of doing. My favorite part was the beer he grabbed on the way down and the "It's been nice!" type of comment he exclaimed as making his grand exit. (Unfortunately, it's election Tuesday and this was my favorite article. I don't really care about Palin's endorsement).

I think sometimes service people just lose it.

My patience, when I have it, has grown quite thin these days. On a really bad day, I have no tolerance for the people who clog up the square for every festive event that takes place. While boasting about how wonderful Concert on the Square was last summer, I completely skipped it this year. Talking with some real Madisonian neighbors, we agreed that surrounding yourself on a lawn full of people who drive in from Egypt to eat frozen entrees and drink cheap wine and think they are being real cultural is not the idea of fun. However, there are plenty of people who aren't like that in attendance.

I went to Wollersheim Winery over the weekend. I blogged about this place when I first moved here. About a thirty minute drive, the winery is on lovely grounds. I bought a french red that I have not opened yet. Since you can sample everything, I know I made a good choice. On a pretty afternoon, it's nice to pack a picnic and sit out on their patio with a bottle. They are cheap, too. You do have to dodge some of those Wisconsin people I was referring to, though. Beware. There are also Madison looking folks who look like they probably biked in from the "big" city.

Thanks for your bike rack photos. Still hoping for a few more.

The Land of Exercise

2010-07-28T21:59:00.002-05:00

**PLEASE E-MAIL ME YOUR BIKE RACK PHOTOS!**

I am lucky I am so disciplined. I have written many times about my addiction to running. In November of 2008, I blogged about exercise. Why aren't more people doing it?

This is something I think about every morning when I am outside: "Why aren't you exercising?" I am tired of your excuses because they are all horrible. Horrendous.

I know I blog about my running on here a lot. It is what brought me to Madison in the first place. But why aren't more people doing it?

I discovered with "On Demand" that I can watch television shows anytime. So, I selected this show called "Jillian" (or something like it) where the woman from the "Biggest Loser" spends a week at an obese family's home and teaches them how to improve their lifestyle. There is more to it than that. But, she hits the nail on the head when she says to the obese adults that they are "selfish." I am pretty sure that is exactly what I have told parents in poor health. And adults who do not exercise.

Why are you selfish? Because you are doing an extreme disservice to your children who love you. And are scared that you will die. Of heart disease, diabetes, cancer, high blood pressure, stroke, etc. If you think it's funny, it's not.

I listed the perks of exercise for me in my blog.

Now I am going to tell you the top three horrible excuses I hear.

1) "I am too busy"

In my pet peeve posting, I made it clear that I hate to hear that. What it really means is "it is not a priority." Do you think I want to blog more than I do? I do. But it id not on the top of my list. Exercise is number one on my list. I make sure it happens. You think I want to get up at 3:30 AM to go running? I have. Because I had to leave my house by 5. Because it is a priority. I am not too busy for it. Too busy? BAD excuse!

2) "I am waiting for it to cool down."
(That's for you, Dad - who is training to walk the five New York boroughs in October, but he hasn't started training yet. Since I put it up here, Dad - you ARE doing it and I am doing it with you. Let's pick a date).

Cool down? I am done with my run by 7:30 AM. Sometimes on the weekend, too. So, get out of bed and do it while the sun is not high in the sky. Or, you can join a gym or do it on the treadmill, like your daughter does from mid-November until early March, six days a week.

3) "I am too tired."

Ahh, my favorite one. Why not get another hour of sleep and still feel sleepy the rest of the day? How about, forgo the hour of sleep, wake up groggy and start pounding the pavement? About two minutes into that, you are AWAKE! Good morning! And it lasts all day! How would you feel if I told you that you can feel alive all day long? Well you can. Workout in the morning and forgo the "snooze" button.

Those are the three excuses that I think are pretty darn lame. I am thirty years old and I weigh the same as I did in eighth grade. Do you want to know how much? Send me an e-mail so I don't sound like one of those self-righteous status updaters on facebook.

A New Eatery

2010-07-15T20:34:00.009-05:00

You have to pay attention to the commerce in your city when you like it a lot. I don't know how my friends completely missed the big Italian restaurant that just opened in between the Starbucks and Ocean Grill off the square. It just opened this past week.

Always excited to try a new restaurant, I went there on Tuesday night. Now this is the difference between Cleveland and Madison (I know I have mentioned the differences before). In Cleveland, there would be an hour and a half wait. And a zillion people in front of you with those pagers that I haven't seen since I moved. Because the ambiance of this place was very, very chain like. I give it a thumbs down. Sorry, Francesca. But I like your name.

The food didn't taste so local to me. It wasn't very busy. There just wasn't anything special about it. But, I am willing to give it a second chance. When I am dining on a square that serves as the largest farmer's market in the country, I expect all of my food to taste like it came from them.

Madison Locals do not like chain restaurants. However, I think it will attract people. Like the folks I see every Saturday, walking a half a mile an hour, eating something with food coloring and a hairdo from 1987. But not the gray haired lady I see gardening in her linen pants at 6:30 AM, or the guy I see training his puppy to swim in the bay. You get the picture?

The service is always questionable when a place first opens up. After waiting for quite some time for the server to come to our table after our food was delivered, my dining partner asked her, "You busy?" in a nice, friendly manner. Her reply: "I, I .... I don't even know what's going on..." She was a nice gal who would serve herself better at a coffee shop as a hippie barista. Don't get me wrong, I didn't think she was bad. I think she was overwhelmed with the place being new.

Good Italian food is hard to come by in Madison. I am sticking to Lombardino's or the most romantic, cozy and tasty Italian place - Osteria Papevero.

My favorite part of "The Isthmus" is finding out the juice on the restaurants. Who is going out, who is coming in, what's good and what's bad.

Now - has anyone noticed that promising looking spot across from Marigold? It is going to be called "Merchant Market?" It looks like it will be an urban market with a wine bar and cocktails. Sounds good.

La Fete de Marquette and More

2010-07-11T19:47:00.004-05:00

**Non-Madison residents, Please e-mail me a photo of a bike rack near your home/work.

In the past few days, I was taking in some local stuff. As for the annual (I believe 52nd?) art fair, you definitely have to be in the mood for the crowd. I saw some nice artists - there's no way to avoid it when you have to walk from my home to the drug store to pick a prescription up.

I saw "Cyrus" at Sundance. Although not a very long movie, there was something "slow" about it. I like Jonah Hill a lot. There are plenty of men will you tell they like Marisa Tomei. A lot. However, real acting talent isn't challenged enough in this film. And the movie certainly had me thinking quite a bit about the capabilities of a child destroying a relationship between a parent and a lover. Does it really happen? Can it happen? My main thoughts were leaning towards a sense of relief.

I enjoyed a Burlesque show at the Majestic. Sorry - I didn't dress up in fishnets and such, but the sword swallower was very impressive. An entertaining night.

And with the overwhelming amount of things to do around here, I had to decide on one of three things at the end of Thursday: La Fete de Marquette, the community pool or a concert on the square. I chose La Fete, which included a free meal/beer for Willy Street Co-op members and a ride on the antique ferris wheel. On the top, you have nice views of our dome and the city skyline. What a gorgeous view it is. The one thing I will tell you about La Fete de Marquette is that I must have missed the memo about babies having to be carried in clothe carriers by your male partner (if your partner is male). Had I known, I probably would have bought one and put a fake baby in there with some dreads and a little scent of patchouli and called it a night.

Best Restaurants in Madison

2010-06-27T10:24:00.005-05:00

I love going out to eat. It's something I do regularly. For a small city, we are spoiled with a lot of really good spots to dine. Here are my recommendations:

Best Pizza:

-Greenbush Pizza
Although not that old, has the feel of an institution. I have even heard a New Yorker say "This is the best pizza I have ever had!"

Best Sushi:
-Muramoto

Best Outdoor Seating:
-Lake Vista Cafe
Overlooks Lake Monona on the top of the Terrace. You feel like you are sitting on the deck of a boat and the food tastes fresh.
-Fresco
On the top of MMOCA, has views of State Street and the Capitol. Also uses a lot of local food. Gourmet!

Best Breakfast/Brunch:
I am not a real "breakfast" kind of person. I enjoy a bowl of cereal and a piece of fruit, but if you want to go out for brunch, there are a fair amount of options.
-Marigold
-Sardine (same owners as Marigold)
Overlooking the lake, It has more of a "big city" ambiance with a menu of fresh options.
-Sophia's Bakery & Cafe
A little, tiny room where you have to sit with strangers at mismatched tables/chairs. I am guessing Sophia is a grandma who loves to bake, but doesn't have to do it for a living. Excellent muffins.

Best Italian:
Lombardino's
Osteria Papavero

Best Thai:
Lao Laan-Xang

Best Ethnic (Nepalese):
Himal Chuli
A "hole in the wall" on State Street.

Best Medditarranean:
Mediatarranean Cafe
Great falafel. I just wish they were open for dinner, too.

Best Bars:
Genna's
Plain cool all around

Natt Spil
Always attractive people (but cash only) Good food, too.

Plan B (Not the Birth Control)

2010-06-20T20:41:00.005-05:00

Summer still has not officially started. For those "downers" who like to say a month from today that it is the "end of the summer," try to reevaluate the "half full" theory. Tomorrow is the summer solstice. And tomorrow is June 21st. Fall equinox is September 22nd. Keep that in mind the next time you try to say that it is the "end" of summer two months out.

This weekend in Madison, I enjoyed watching a little bit of the "Annual Pirate Days" on Lake Mendota. I sat at the Memorial Union at UW which overlooks Lake Mendota. The place was crowded with all ages of people drinking beer, working on their laptops, eating ice cream and spectating the Hoofers Sailing Club event. (I hardly watched. I was flapping my gums a little).

I ventured over to the inaugural "Fruitfest" hosted by - Plan B. I mentioned it in a blog posting from December. My friends know I love to go dancing. The "clubbing" venue is slim around here, although there are a few. I love Plan B. If I was able to psych myself up to do it every weekend, I would. But I manage to get there about once a month.

"Fruitfest" was an all-day block party hosted by Plan B with some vendors, beer, and drag queen performances. (See photo). Once the block party ended, we went in the club for some all night dancing. This is a LGBTG club. I am straight and I do very occasionally get hit on. I don't care one way or the other. It's all good and fun. Straight men and women go there as well (obviously).

It's what you would expect: dance music, grinding and the likes. The bartenders are dressed quite skimpily. On Saturday nights, it is always jam packed. The drinks are completely reasonable. I am happy to open a tab and I have never had a pricey bar tab at the end of the evening.

But let me warn you, the next day usually results in a headache and some "oh my Gods." I can't wait to do it again next weekend.

Now - here is a homework assignment:

I would like to gather photos of bike racks in other cities. Can you please e-mail me the first bike rack you approach? I am going to do a posting on it in July. Please e-mail photos by June 30th. Thanks in advance!

A Summer Weekend in Madison

2010-06-13T17:49:00.006-05:00

Technically, summer has not yet started. But the weather is right and the kids are wrapping up with school. The days are long. And the pool has opened.

Last week, I blogged about Ride the Drive. I am scared of biking. (Yes I admit it. Actually, I am traumatized and have a fear of being hit by a car). I chose to do it on foot with my dog. And, it's no surprise that the event was a huge success. The six mile loop was blocked off from traffic and people of all ages biked, walked, skated and ran through the city streets. I wish I had brought my camera. If I am going to describe the successful venues around Madison, it is time to start proving it.

Two problems. Actually three.

1)If you are a runner, then you understand that it is an inconvenience to run with anything. Let alone a camera.

2) My camera is an antique. It should be collecting social security. (Oh - and I am a horrible photographer).

3) Since I was about 18, I was always avoiding looking like a "tourist." Even in my own city. So the camera doesn't help.

Anyway, I did take photographs and it worked out well.

You can see the amount of bikers in town, based on the bike rack I photographed. You know how I always praise Madison for being "biker friendly?" This is any given rack around town.

I attended the annual Marquette Waterfront Festival in Madison. I blogged about it last summer. An outdoor music festival brings a melting pot of people together. While Madison is not the most diverse city, this is one place where it appears slightly diverse. The photo of the tables and tents was taken there - along the shore of Lake Monona. The "Dime a Dozen" photo shows some dread headed hippies, watching "The Handphibians" - the Brazilian-style percussionists. (These spectators are a "dime in dozen around here.) You get the scent of patchouli, bad body odor and lots of kids with two moms/two dads. Nothing wrong with that. I heart Madison!

I visited New Glarus, home of the world famous, "Spotted Cow" beer. My mom finally likes drinking due to this tasty brew. New Glarus is also known as "Little Switzerland." Everything there is pronounced like "Scnitzelheinen this" and "Schtuberazian that" (I totally made that up).

After co-hosting a party involving karaoke, I finally did my solo act of Frank Sinatra's, "The Lady is a Tramp." I worked the stage and hammed it up a bit. I only have about four songs I can do. So if I ever get a second job as a lounge singer, you'll be hearing four songs over and over again. We also did "Janie's Got a Gun." How come people still tell me they have never heard of my name before? Do they know who Aerosmith is?

It was an event filled weekend. The market is my weekly ritual (see photos) and they had emergency vehicles on the square yesterday for demos. The kids could see the sheriff's car, fire trucks, police dogs and the likes.

Who knows what's happening next weekend in Madison, but I am sure it will be festive.

Progressive Madison and its Healthy Lifestyle

2010-06-06T11:15:00.007-05:00

Madison, Wisconsin. A healthy, liberal and economically stable city. My parents were visiting this spring. My Dad said to me, "As soon as I got off the beltline, runners and walkers were everywhere. Just like you're always talking about in your blog."

Runners and bikers do rule the roads here. I wish I could do more to promote the city of Madison. It is continuously voted "best place to live." How are people missing this?

I feel like there is a certain level of sophistication that is necessary for people to "get Madison." Like, if you aren't well read, then you probably don't know anything about Madison. Whereas you probably don't know anything about Austin, then. Because they are supposed to be very similar.

Take the guy who I met in Montreal. An extremely wealthy businessman. How do I know he was very wealthy? Besides the fact that he told me what he does for a living, google works, people. (Why aren't more people taking advantage of this? Because so many Americans are lazy, that's why.) So Mr. Wealthy man from Buffalo, New York and I are talking. He is very smart. That's for sure. But he is not refined, so to speak. First, he tells me that he travels a ton for work, but has never left the continent. When I asked him why, (he obviously could afford a trip to Australia, if he wanted to,) he says, "I don't know." Ok - that is so weird. But ok. Then he asks in a condescending way, "What is there to do in Madison, Wisconsin?"

Where do I start? Concerts, outdoor films, an ironman, the USA Cycling 2010 Collegiate Road National Championships,skiing, boating, hiking, running, biking, great food, waterfront festivals, jazz concerts, umm... there is a University here and the country's largest farmer's market. So why does this guy not know that? Why don't more people know this?

It appears that if you don't move to large cities like Chicago or New York, you're not worthy. But I would much rather be living in my Madison condo down town, paying the exact same rent I was paying in 2003 living in Boston. And have money left over to enjoy my surroundings. Because there is actually a lot more that I enjoy in this little city than there was in Boston.

So I suppose the secret remains. This is one of the best cities to live in. Yesterday, I watched thousands of people walking by for Breast Cancer. And right now, I am heading out to ride the drive. Guess who else is going to attend the next Ride the Drive in this "small town?" Have you ever heard of Lance Armstrong?

How to Stay Skinny

2010-05-13T20:28:00.005-05:00

Now there is the "Skinny Girl" this and "Skinny Bitch" that and the "Skinny Italian" and the list goes on. The sociologist in me says healthy eating is related to class.

I can tell you my secret on staying thin. Several years ago, I started including a minimum of five fruits and vegetables a day. When I moved to Madison and had more local resources, my diet improved. For me, my vegetables and fruit intake does not include apple sauce, marinara with mushrooms, jelly and the sort. I also don't eat "Walmart" type produce where the strawberries look like they are on steroids. Most of my requirements are raw or close to it.

Here are some examples of what I put in my mouth every day:

-Raw peppers (yellow, green, red)
-2-3 clementines
-Organic Blueberries (they don't have to be organic. Just not sprayed).
-Organic Strawberries
-Steamed Chard
-Steamed Broccoli
-Grapefruit
-Raw Spinach
-Raw Mushrooms

These are just some examples. I eat the spinach out of the bag from the farmer who grew it. I don't dress it. I don't steam it. I just eat it. The same with the mushrooms. I just eat it out of the bag from the person who grew it. Who I met. The mushrooms have been transported from his farm to the stand where I have purchased it. It's quite simple. No sprays. No flights across an ocean.

I hate shopping for clothes. I would much rather wander an upscale grocery store. And I would much rather spend my money on good food for my body.

Many years ago, I babysat for a family whose three year old told me, "If you can't pronounce it, you shouldn't eat it." I totally agree.

My freezer has ice and fruit popsicles from when I had a sore throat. That is it. I don't even buy frozen food any more. Or canned food. It's just not fresh. I don't want that in my body.

So, I am thin and I have the fresh food and five fruits/vegetables intake a day. Of course, running 25-30 miles a week helps, too!

But here is another secret. I eat a lot of junk, too. Certain times of the month, I love a Dairy Queen blizzard. After miserable hangovers, I love a stuffed crust Pizza Hut pizza. I live in Wisconsin now, so cheese curds rock! But I just don't feel well eating that stuff all of the time.

I thank my friend for posting this article in the "Huffington Post" because this is what made me decide it is an appropriate topic to address. Even people who have the means to afford better quality (yet more expensive) food choose not to.

Madison being the healthy city that it is makes it easy for me. I don't know how I got here. My mom never liked "fake food." We never had margarine or fake sugars such as diet sodas and she always made everything from scratch. As good as Annie's frozen Mac & Cheese is, I just can't bring myself to eat it. And it's organic. It's just not fresh.

In the "Huffington Post" article, Joel Salatin, an American farmer is quoted, stating, "Most of us have a more intimate relationship with our hair cutter than we do with our farmer." This is an ironic statement for me because I do not have a hairdresser in Madison. However, I do have my favorite farmer stands.

I know I am a minority. Instead of spending your money on a pair of jeans for your expanding waist, how about buying some local fruits and vegetables and watching your waist shrink and your risk for heart disease decrease? Come on, Americans!

Stop Photographing My Meal

2010-05-09T16:33:00.007-05:00

Real food. Food obsession. Food blogs. Food Photographs. Long before I read the article in the NYT, I thought about writing about this craze. This thing with social media where people like to photograph their food and then upload it online.

There may be something self indulgent about it. But it has become a real epidemic. A big hipster trend. Not only am I going to go to my farmer's market and tweet and blog about it, but I will also blog and tweet about the CSA I belong to, what I prepared for dinner on my food blog and then, upload all of these colorful photos! (Or, if I want to be even cooler, I can do black and white photos).

So, I don't think there is anything wrong with the sharing of recipes and comments. That is how we all get new dishes, right? The food blogs are nice and helpful. It's the photographing that is a little strange from time to time.

I made a salad nicoise a few weeks ago. Asparagus, potatoes, lettuce, olives, lemon juice and olive oil, tomatoes - all real food. The next thing I know, I am putting it out on the counter and my dinner is being photographed by my friend. Can't we just eat it? Was my salad nicoise uploaded online and exploited? Without my permission?

I have discovered various meals I have ordered on various websites. The hipster movement seems to think it's just plain cool to photograph a real natural and colorful meal before digesting it. It's an art form. And a trend.

Sitting in a recent panel presented by the Social Media Club of Madison a blogger in the audience mentioned a wonderful blog she follows written by an attorney who has a food blog. I thought she was implying that it is something different or unique. Maybe I read her wrong I am not sure. But, a food blog seems to be the thing to do - I have thought about it many times. Viewers probably enjoy it immensely and it's a great tool - but it's not unique. (Ummm... have you heard of "Julie and Julia?" I am just saying).

So this every growing popularity is probably good for the economy. Just think - camera businesses make money selling special cameras. Hipsters like to make sure everyone knows that it is "organic and local," so the farmers are making money. And so are restaurants that are serving sustainable ingredients. It's a win-win.

The Most Infamous Blogger in Madison

2010-04-26T19:57:00.006-05:00

I was curious to read about Ann Althouse when I saw the latest Isthmus come out on Thursday. Coincidentally, I had been performing some queries on NYT online on The University of Wisconsin and Ann Althouse continued to pop up. Not long after that, she was rated, "Madison's #1 Blogger" on the cover of "The Isthmus."

"Who is this woman?" I asked myself. How come I am not reading the "number one blogger in Madison?" I will tell you one reason - I can't keep up with her. According to Craver's article, she blogs up to a dozen times a day. Now, many days, I don't even make it to facebook, due to my workload, so forget keeping up with Althouse.

So I went to her blog. And I liked it. And then I went to review her on the NYT website. Although in the article Jack Craver writes about her, he depicts her as a "right wing political blogger," from what I gathered from her blog in the past hour or so, she is right wing, but she isn't that right wing. C'mon, kids. Madison is leaning to the left so much that we are tipping over so her opinions probably do sound ultra conservative to the UW student who wrote about her.

Her profile alone has been viewed over 365,000 times. She is a law professor. A brilliant woman. With an opinion. Who lives in a small city. (Madison, that is). Do I agree with everything our "famous blogger" says? No. But she seems to take a current event, pick it apart, pull out the gossip and share her point of view. She is humorous.

I have a hard time staying on top of the current events. I try to. I tell myself every morning, "One international news article to discuss with a friend." I start to read it and then get lost in the story about the Sarah Palin hack case. I start to wonder if she works out or if that baby daddy made a lot of money posing for "Playgirl." "Focus, focus," I tell myself.

Althouse likes the current events but she likes the "juice" as well. She puts the "fun" in what could be a dreary article - some posts had me LOL and some are as short as a line (tweet, tweet) and still manage to bring over 50 comments.

What engaged me right away are the photos that Ann has of the indoor of her refrigerator! (Just like me!) and the outdoor photos of Wisconsin (Just like me!) Oh - and photos of the farmer's market (Ok, you get it!) When does this lady work? According to the article, she only teaches two courses.

But this infamous Madison blogger has one of the biggest blogs in the country - all a mile away from me.

Typical Saturday in Madison

2010-04-19T21:49:00.003-05:00

There becomes a time when I feel so, so lucky. And it is when it is warm out. And I never, ever, ever take it for granted that I live in such a liveable city. That so many people are unaware of. What a gem of a city I live in. And I just feel so incredibly lucky to live here.

What other place can you wake up in the morning, run to a bike path, greeted by other runners, no worrying about cars to dodge, walk to the largest farmer's market in the country, meet up with friends/family, spend quality time together, walk down a main shopping area with mostly local shops, run into your boyfriend, walk less than a block, sit down (outside) for a local meal at an ethnic restaurant and almost feel like you are in another country, then walk to an Italian film at an annual film festival, overlooking the lake?! (Sorry for the run-on sentence, but I couldn't help it).

Take the dog for a nice walk. Go home to eat vegetables grown by a farmer who I have met who transported the food solo. Who is the only person who handled the food start-to-finish. No sprays. No "steroids." No preservatives. Lots of fiber. Lots of vitamins. Lots of real food.

Walk a few blocks to meet a friend for drinks. Walk her home. Walk back up to the square to meet more people. It's 1:00 AM and I have not been in a car all day.

No taking the car out. Ok, so maybe I woke up the next morning with a horrible headache. But it was worth it.

I am so lucky. There is such a quality of life here. And I was walking the dog after work today. As I approached my home, I heard my name. My friends were walking to dinner. And before I knew it, I had spontaneous dinner plans. Without ever having to get in a car.

My Pet Peeves

2010-04-11T10:20:00.004-05:00

I have so many of them I don't know where to start. A few years back, I was reading the local paper in Cleveland, when I came across an article my uncle wrote about his pet peeves. I am not stealing his idea. I am always writing in my subconscious and thinking about how to communicate my pet peeves to people. Why not express it here? I enjoyed reading his article. I thought it was funny.

The interesting thing about this blog posting is that I realized that my pet peeves have changed since I moved to Madison because some old pet peeves have vanished. Below are my current annoyances.

1. I am going to start with the expression; "I can't believe." It's a stupid expression. And it is more annoying when people on facebook write "I can't believe my baby is three today." It seems that every mother posts that on their child's birthday. What part can't they believe? Is there some scientific phenomenon that I am not aware of? If I said I can't believe I am thirty, that would be a total lie. So much has happened in my life that I can totally believe it. Memories get blurry and life moves fast. A day can easily slip away. Believe it. Your kid is three. Nothing unbelievable about it.

2. Runners/walkers who are 100% oblivious to their surroundings. Yesterday morning, as I ran past a girl who was walking on the bike path, she decided to do one of those 360 degree turns and started to turn right into me - completely unaware that I was passing her. Maybe she needed to use a turn signal with her hand?

3. "We did good" sounds so uneducated to me. It's "doing well." You all know I hate that. We learned that in second grade.

4. Oh - this is my favorite one. The "I am so busy" phrase. It's all relative. We all have 24 hours in one day. You choose your priorities. I hate when people make excuses stating they are "too busy." What I feel like you are really saying to me is, "It's just not my top priority." So maybe say that instead.

5. People who ask me stupid questions referencing the demise of my parent's marriage. Mainly, "Do you talk to your dad/mom?" Just because they had a divorce doesn't mean we became estranged. I am a big believer that you can blame both people in any break-up. It takes two. So I blame them equally and talk to them equally. (I don't really blame them for anything - just that they probably married too young and my theory proves to be true here.)

6. When apostrophes aren't used properly. Specifically, when used with age and years. There is nothing possessive about it. I am now in my 30s. Why are you including an apostrophe there? There is nothing possessive about years, as far as I know. It is not the 1990's. It is the 1990s.

I hope you learned something today. If nothing else - what my pet peeves are.

The Etiquette of Social Media

2010-04-05T21:54:00.005-05:00

With all of the technology going on these days, I think I need to lay the laws of the "dos and don'ts" of social media and there are many of them. My good girlfriend founded the Social Media of Madison, of which I am on the board. As an ever-growing phenomenon, let's take a look here.

1)As mentioned previously, one thing that I don't agree with is using a photo of your child as your profile picture on facebook. That is not you. That's your kid.

2) It is completely inappropriate to "friend" clients on facebook. Any professional relationships you have should not see photos that your friends tag of you at a dance club with a budlight in hand. Or a status update of your "announcement" that you hate your boss or hate your competitor. That is incredibly tacky and classless. (I suppose it is ok if you have them as a "friend" on a privacy setting....)

3) Do not make cryptic tweets/status updates on facebook. People who do that are craving attention. Updates such as, "Horrible news. What am I going to do?" doesn't disclose your update. It discloses that you want people to become immersed with your secret. Lame. (Now, if you post a picture of a baby and your update is "exciting day," we can take a wild guess...)

4) What is this whole thing about trying to gain 797 friends? I am working hard all of the time to minimize everything in my life. Including my friend list. Unless we are truly friends, I don't need to be friends with you. I already got rid of about sixty-five people. I am not trying to be mean. I just find it uneccesary and pointless. If I am not looking at your photos/blog/updates, you probably aren't looking at this.

5) Phantom blog readers. I know you're reading this. You tell me you are. But you don't comment. And then you send me an e-mail. A blog's comments section is for that. Your comments. Not my inbox in my gmail account.

6) People who use their work e-mail for all of their e-mail. Talk about abusing your time at work.

Get the hint? Now use in out in cyber world.

Peace.

Random Acts of Kindness

2010-03-29T20:30:00.003-05:00

I liked Madison for a lot of reasons before I moved here. As I walked around the square this afternoon, I remembered the most enticing thing about the city - the outdoor activity and respect that outdoorspeople receive. Unlike any other U.S. city I have seen, bikers were kindly being dodged by traffic at a busy corner.

I walked to a law firm to drop something off. I didn't feel like tying my dog up. A stranger offered to stay with her and watch her while I went into the building. I kindly asked the building's security guard to make sure the stranger didn't steal my dog. (I don't know why he would. He would have given me a ransom and returned her..) I felt safe about the whole thing. I knew before I left my house that I could have a stranger watch her, if need be.

Walking back, so many people complimented by "pretty dog." If you passed me, you would have thought I was walking with a friend the way an unidentified woman walked with me and talked about what a great dog a golden retriever is.

And a few weeks ago, as I sat at the bar a block away with a book and tears streaming down my face, a stranger approached me and asked me if I was ok. She gave me a hug and offered support.

Sometimes I can be private and sometimes quite public (like on here). It's nice to know I am never alone, if I feel the need to lay a shoulder on a random stranger. Madison locals are your friends. And I am touched by them.

My Life

2010-03-14T22:35:00.004-05:00

It's very difficult to blog and not get personal about the intricate details. I have had a very interesting past few months. Someone told me today, "You do things that people dream of doing, but never actually do them." I was lied to in one of the worst ways. Discovered embezzlement. Was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Consulted with my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend. Broke up. Cried for a day. Loudly. Alone. Without wanting to see/talk with anyone. Attempted a date. Did an intake for two and a half hours. Ran into ex ahead of time. Felt badly about everything. Confusing several men. Went to an open house where I saw a hot guy I sort of know. Still wonder why more people aren't exercising and going to therapy. It is so easy to eat a minimum of five to eight raw fruits and vegetables a day, why aren't more people doing it? Behaving badly (not illegally, mind you). Wondering why more people stay in lousy relationships. Get mad at people for lying to me. Ok - just an fyi - I am not mad at all. I am sitting here smiling and looking forward to a prosperous week.

Go to Therapy, Already!

2010-03-08T21:28:00.003-06:00

I am really mad. Because I am the one who did all the work and now I am the one who goes back for more work. Do you know I have been to about eight or nine therapists in my short lifetime? This is not because I am some demented person with an abusive past. This is because history repeats itself and I am very cautious.

For work, I met with a delusional, pathological liar, who claimed to have worked with high-profile, public figures. But their facts were all wrong. Nothing was adding up. I knew immediately that they were sick in the head. "Get some help, girl!," I wanted to yell at her. Instead, I am the one seeking help. This just doesn't add up.

And if one more person tells me, and I am quoting here, how I "Opened up their eyes," I think I am going to puke. Because this isn't my job. It is not my job to steer people towards the "Road of Help."

Do you have an issue with your parents? Do you feel the sudden need to identify with a religion? Do you belittle your loved ones (most of you who read this do and don't even know you do it). Are you obsessed with things - perhaps food/work/putting down your lover? Not over your ex? Confuse your newest break-up with your narcissistic ex? Have an inappropriate relationship with your mom/dad? Helicopter parent? Work twenty hours a day? Expect too much from yourself/others? Married your first "love?" Don't know what the hell love is? Married the first/second/third person you slept with? Dating your therapist? Dating your lover's therapist? Sleeping with many women/men? Decided you're suddenly gay? Compulsive liar? Living with an alcoholic? Dating a gambler? cohabitate with someone you don't really love but tell yourself you do? (And don't realize it)...

When I wrote that everyone needs therapy, everyone does, indeed need therapy! I am healthy. And this is because of therapy. I am not addicted to work. Or really anything. I have a healthy routine of diet and exercise. Healthy relationships and a great balance of work and life. I know how to live. I never dread where I am in life. Or how I lived my past. I don't have any regrets.

Someone sent me an e-mail about a year ago, accusing me of "not being happy" because of a lot of my postings. Wow! What a great analysis of me! You deserve an award. And, by the way. if you want to criticise me, that is what the "COMMENTS" section is for.

Am I happy? I don't have to prove that to anyone. Anyone who needs to prove that they are happy probably isn't. I am just really tired of doing the work when nobody else is. I had a friend who vented to me non-stop. For some reason, nobody wants to leave me alone with their problems. I finally gave up and said "You know, I am so sorry you are feeling this way. It sounds painful. But I am not a professional. Have you thought about going to one?" I repeated this each and every time they complained to me. Each and every time. I never changed the wording. Did they go? I don't know. I moved. We lost touch. I doubt it. They didn't sound like they wanted to change things. Some people sound very happy having their problems. There are some people who like the drama.

But most healthy individuals I know have gone to therapy at some point in life. And if you haven't gone, then I advise you to go. There have been times where I don't know what I am even going to discuss until I sit down. But there is always plenty to talk about.

Losing My Religion

2010-02-28T11:40:00.004-06:00

The College of Wooster requires that every senior complete a year long senior thesis. I wrote mine on the dichotmy of religion in a marriage. Always having been interested in the strains that are related to an unsuccessful marriage, this was an interesting topic to me.

Having found a copy of my thesis last month, I began reading it. I haven't read it in a while. In a nutshell, I discovered that although you and your spouse may have been raised with the same religion, your faith in your marriage can still be problematic. This is based simply on the fact that one may have had been more conservative than the other.

What happens when religion is forced upon you? I am an easy sample of this. You turn against it. And it was never really "forced." I just remember my first day of Sunday school. Too well. And begging my mom not to make me go. Dad wasn't in the picture in that memory. Dad never made me do anything when it came to religion. And when the folks split up and Dad said to us, "You know, I don't care who you marry. If he isn't the same religion, that doesn't matter to me." I always knew that.

I was in someone's house last week and observed their "funny Jesus" paintings in a couple of spots around the house. In one, he is playing soccer. They mocked it, leading me to believe that they thought it was goofy. "Did you both go to Catholic school?" I asked them. "No. But we were raised Catholic and have decided not to have any organized religion."

So what happens when you have to go to religious school against your will? You don't want it. You resist it.

I have two theories on people who become more religious as young adults:

1) They never had a sense of strong identity so this is it for them.
2) They have addictive personalities.

Too much of anything is not good. We all know that.

I was turned off from religion at sixteen. My sister told me I would outgrow it. By eighteen, when asked what religion I was, I would simply say, "nothing." I haven't practiced anything. I make christmas cookies. I have been to Easter brunch. I have been to a Chanukah dinner. I have been invited to Baptisms. I have never been to a Jewish Bris and I never will. There is something so incredibly wrong with inviting people over to watch a baby have his you-know-what chopped and then eating a spread of bagels and cream cheese. It is archaic, barbaric and wrong in so many ways.

My parents were both raised Jewish. Obviously, one more than the other. I learned as an adult that my dad's maternal grandfather went on to convert to Catholicism and had three children with his Catholic wife - all who never knew their father was born a Jew.

The Jewish population is very small. So small, in fact, that I have often times met people throughout my life who will tell me that they have "never met a Jewish person before." I am lucky I was always aware of this. And I thank my parents for exposing me to all walks of life. Because if you grow up in say, Beachwood, Ohio, where probably 90% of your classmates are Jewish, it may not be until college when you hear someone ask you that. I had someone ask me about the horns. I was prepared. my parents raised me well. My whole life, I have always been conscious that we are a minority.

More sophisticated people seem to be familiar with religion in general. They are aware of the facts of the Jewish people. Just like they seem to be aware that their Muslim co-worker may not be eating during the day because of Ramadan. (Something else I always knew about it - thanks to my Mom, who had a Muslim friend growing up).

Yes, the people who are sitting around here as I type, reading the Sunday "Times" know what a Bat Mitzvah is. They may have never been to one. But they know. Just like they may also be aware that a Hindu wedding may be partially in Sanskrit. But this is not the majority of Americans.

So, fourteen years later and I still do not associate with a religion. Or feel the need for one. And I refuse to marry someone who cannot support my anti-religion because that just won't work. Fortunately, most of the hipsters around here are all categorized as "agnostic" on facebook.

The Rules, 2010

2010-02-25T14:26:00.002-06:00

When I wrote "Everything I Learned About Relationships" in October of 2008, I wasn't kidding around. I wrote my eight rules that I try to follow when it comes to dating. I may want to add some here and there, but I am reflecting, as I did in March of 2009.

Well, now it is almost March of 2010, and I am reflecting back on my rules.

Let's reflect. Number one is about not living in the same city as your parents or your partner's parents. I still feel strongly about this. And maybe it is because I tend to date men who have bad relationships with their parents. I don't know. Look at the way he treats his mom. That's how he is going to treat you. Unresolved issues with the folks? That's a red flag.

Number two is about not dating someone who has been married before. It is ok if there are no kids in the picture. I am currently reading a non fiction book written by women who date men with ex wives and children. They all have the same complaint - she is still in the picture, even though they are divorced. Let's think about this: You are in an unhealthy marriage with children. You fight a lot. You already sleep in separate bedrooms. You get divorced. You still see each other and communicate all of the time because you have children together. You are still fighting a lot. You are still sleeping separately. What changed? Not much, other than it is ethical to date other people and you do not have to live under the same roof. (Do you sense a little skepticism of the marriage institution here?) The starter marriage is still ok with me. Practice for the real thing.

Number three states not to date someone with kids. See above. Strongly agree. There are too many wacko ex wives out there.

Next: Friends first. Definitely. Many nights, I will see what the girlfriends are up to first.

My fifth rule referred to not allowing men to do manly things for you. I am slowly failing at this. There was something really sexy about watching my boyfriend with the electric drill....

Rule six refers to not dating a workaholic. I think this is huge. Statistically, workaholics have psychological problems. They are ignoring their problems. They don't take care of themselves and tend to have health problems and strained relationships. Does that sound sexy to you?

Number seven is my rule referencing the importance of dating someone your own age. I think this is important. You tend to be in the same place.

My eighth rule is my favorite. See if your "ideal day" matches up. All this really means is that you have the same interests.

I am going to add another rule. Number Nine is an obvious one. He needs to be very sexy. He has to workout. He has to be toned/tall/dark/handsome/whatever you find sexy. You know why? Because if all you like is his personality and he starts to get on your nerves, at least he is still attractive to you.

Work Obsession

2010-02-21T08:50:00.004-06:00

I am really slowing down on the postings. I apologize. I really plan on working on improving. I have become someone that I never thought I would become.

(Anyhow, I was saying... I have become a little bit too obsessed with work and my career. My workaholic friend actually called me for career advice. After talking with her for about an hour, she told me I was very helpful. Last night, she said to me, "I did everything you told me to do and it worked!" I am thinking to myself, "Did I even tell you to do anything?" I mean, I was honored that she came to me, but I felt like she is my "rock" when it comes to anything work related.

My sister said, "You have to stop caring about work so much." My boyfriend said to me, "You're obsessed with work." Now, it's really not that bad.

There are a lot of pieces to this. I think the biggest one is that people see I am a big networker. And networking gets you places. It is a huge asset and a career builder.

All I can do is laugh when I see how I have gone from the "newbie" in my office to becoming the sole representation of our entire territory in just one year. I laugh because it's all I can do.

I hate people who say they are too busy. And I plan to dedicate a whole posting to that topic. Soon. Real soon.

But now I am going to enjoy my Sunday. My 10:00 coffee with a friend. A 12:00 birthday brunch. A 4:00 real estate advice/home staging that someone asked me to do for them. Oh yeah, and then I have to finish my taxes....

Does Having Kids Make You Lose Your Sense of Self?

2010-02-07T11:34:00.006-06:00

After noticing on facebook that too many people use their child's photo as their profile picture, I have had enough. Is this you? Or is this your child? I am confused. I know you think they are the cutest production of all time. But, you are still you, aren't you?

And now I see that people are posting their pregnancy tests on facebook. They are actually uploading the positive pregnancy test photo. What has social media come to?

I get all my juice on facebook. I don't need to have any conversations with my girlfriends on if they had their baby or what they named it. I can see it all online.

But a profile picture is supposed to be you. I know some people sometimes have their spouse in it. Or a nice landscape. That's ok with me. And I don't disagree or think it's wrong to have a funny photo or a huge cartoon of Bart Simpson. And as I am doing my research for this posting (yes, I actually make sure I am accurate on here), I totally missed doppelganger week on facebook. I have been told I look like a lot of people. But, let's be real here. I am going to go with Anne Frank on this one. There. Done!

So what happens to a young adult when they have a child? Besides the fact that their whole life can change. No more late nights at a bar, stopping for "one more" on your walk home and having a slice of pizza. Sleeping until 9 or so. Out the door with five minutes notice to meet a friend. Yes, everything changes. But I certainly wouldn't want to lose my sense of self along the way.

It appears when parents use their child's photo on facebook that they are losing a little bit of their own identity. Would you turn in a resume and put your child's name next to yours? And their e-mail address, too? Is this is a "two for one?" If I have you, I have to have your kid, too?

Or maybe, people who do this feel a stronger identity as a parent. And must identify with that now. It makes them feel meaningful. Which is sad. I am curious on your thoughts on this one.

Heavy Women Vs. Thin

2010-01-24T13:47:00.003-06:00

I met someone this week who is around my age and probably weighs fifty pounds more than me. I didn't even think about it much. Until she was nasty to me for no reason. I asked myself, "Am I being rude"? "Did I say something offensive"? (She did) After the conversation ended, I realized what her problem was: she was mean to me because I am thin and she is not.

So I am telling the story of the mean girl to some people this morning and they beg to differ. But I cannot tell you how many times I have been in this situation. Yeah, so studies show that thinner women may have a better salary, make heavier women feel worse about their bodies, get more attention, yadda yadda. Why would they want to be nice to us?

It is slightly infuriating to be the victim of insults and put downs because the other person is so insecure with their own body image. I have had people tell me that they notice their "heavy-set female co-workers" are extra condescending to them on days when their thin bodies are more noticeable.

So I ask the sister psychologist "Don't you think it makes sense that someone I meet in a "competitive" setting who is around my age and heavy is going to be a b#$%h to me"? "Yes, absolutely", she replies.

Just this week, I received a message from an old friend. The last line stating, "PS you look nothing like Arlene, you skinny b*tch. (love)" (Arlene was some heavy-set Italian woman she told me I looked like when I danced in college....)

There is a stigma with skinny. The next adjective following is a bad word. Think Parisian women. I am not bragging here. I am thin. And I don't consider myself a female dog at all. I am caring and compassionate and thoughtful. Here, I will quote my boyfriend, in an e-mail he just sent me:

"I think you're a smart, extremely generous,
passionate, honest, reliable, confident, sensitive and beautiful
woman".

Nowhere in there do I see that I am cruel. So why do skinny women have to have this reverse discrimination from heavy set women? Heavy women can tell me I don't understand. Or I have no idea. Or they can't get a date and I don't have that problem. Or anything. But I gained that weight in college. I have been a lot bigger. I am lucky now. I will blog about it sometime - how I maintain a small figure. But not now. So I know.

There was an obese woman at my gym who would never, ever look me in the eye. I am guessing she weighed somewhere around 300 pounds and was maybe two inches taller than me. The whole time I would see her there, she absolutely refused to make eye contact with me. In the parking lot, crossing paths, she would look down. Passing on the way to the shower, the same situation. I can say in the years that I was a member there, she never looked at me. If it was just the two of us, I would intentionally say "hello" and smile. She always looked away. I know why. I went out of my way to be nice. But it's hard when the other person won't look at you.

I am not trying to brag. I just think that all women are created equal. So why be mean?

A Touristy Visit to Cleveland

2010-01-20T19:24:00.005-06:00

After a year and a half, I went home to Cleveland, Ohio. As my Dad, a New Yorker says regarding his trips back to Queens, "It's like you never left".

In Cleveland, there are many places to go and people to see. My favorite and very much missed restaurant is Tommy's in Coventry. This is ideal for vegetarians and there is plenty for the carnivore. The milkshakes are to die for. After the birth of my niece last March, I didn't think I would ever enjoy a meal with both my mother and father but they are so easygoing about things. (Thanks)

Straight from the airport, we went to Tremont. I would say it is a gentrified area that is now eclectic where the old world meets the new. Art galleries, good restaurants and locally owned shops remain the draw there.

After reviewing "36 Hours in Cleveland" in the "Times", I wanted to try out a new restaurant by Case Western Reserve University called "L'Abatros". I love the atmosphere around Case Western. You are surrounded by the cultural part of Cleveland. There is that suggestion of intellect and scholarly sub-culture that you feel in Madison. The people are more "earthy" and the architecture, particularly the art museum and Severance Hall are easy on the eyes.

In fact, I find that when you travel (although I don't think I can count visiting home traveling) you tend to do things that remind you of home or of your routine.

L'Abatros was busy at 9:00 PM on a Saturday and this was with a reservation. An upscale American dining experience was not disappointing. I enjoyed the seasonal and fresh tasting salad with butternut squash, the goat cheese entree in a crock with fresh vegetables, the white pizza and their pasta of the day. (We shared all of the above).

I knew the Gauguin exhibit was currently on display at the Cleveland Art Museum and I wanted to make a point to see it before the last day. It was a perfect show. Not as overwhelming as some of the other exhibits, you learn about Gauguin's relationship with some other famous artists of his time as well as the story of the Volpini Exhibition (a little history on the Eiffel Tower - ooh-la-la!) Although I love Madison, our classic art museum is owned by the University and does not house such famous paintings as the Cleveland Museum of Art does. If you get to Cleveland, definitely go to their museums.

I was able to visit old friends and family. As you get closer to thirty, you realize the value of these people. It was so special to see each one of them. Even my almost 98 year old aunt, who I need to stay in better touch with.

The other great part of my visit was when my boyfriend wanted to watch old movies of my family and me. Starting in 1973, when my mom and dad were in their twenties, we watched through the decades of hair styles,puberty, bad clothes and beyond. It was really fun and it made me think a lot about my childhood.

After a year and a half of being away, there was so much to do and so little time. But what I came back to Madison with is this: I am lucky. Because I went home and saw my mom and dad. And other relatives with all of their little hangups. And it was so pleasant. And calm. We didn't have any turbulence. Which is so refreshing.

A Meeting with the Ex

2010-01-10T12:19:00.005-06:00

It has been an unforgettable week for me. I took on a little investigation.
Madison is small. So small, in fact, that you cannot really be too secretive. I was watching the french film "La Ceremonie" last night. In it, two disturbing and unremorseful women learn that they have both been accused of different criminal acts. One had recently been hired in the small town as a maid for a wealthy family. It had me thinking. If you attempted to hire either on of them in Madison, their names would be so tainted that their resumes would never hit your desk.

You can't get too far around here without someone knowing your name. And I took on my own investigation when I got upset enough with my boyfriend that it was time to hear about his romantic past. It became my duty to seek out his last serious girlfriend and have a conversation with her.

It started a long time ago. When he refused to go into my favorite coffee shop. After enough interrogating, he finally admitted that he dated someone who worked there. After doing some of my own research, I found out that she no longer worked there. About six months later I found out everything I needed to know in the event that I needed to get in touch with her. Supposedly she wanted to get in touch with me. A few weeks ago, when I walked into the coffee shop en route to work, I knew it was her who was waiting on me. And she knew it was me. I could just tell.

So when we sat down together the other day and had a chat, I said "I could just see that you knew who I was. There was a look there. And I knew it was you, too. Somehow, I just knew". After a discussion on things, she was rather helpful. He didn't know about the meeting until after the fact. And he is not happy about it at all. He thinks it is totally weird. But it was so good for me. And I recommend it.

I don't know if I am more curious about the ex girlfriends/wives than others. A long time ago (in fact it is still in my "drafts"), I had started a posting on this topic. I am always curious about what the ex is like. I think an ex girlfriend or an ex wife says a lot about the person. And to hear about their dynamic is intriguing if not helpful.

We obviously are a generation where ex partners exist. Many of them. Our parents may have not had this benefit, marrying so young but we are lucky.

My peers have histories of relationships behind them. Why aren't more of my friends doing this? I have no jealousy here. At my tete-a-tete with the ex, we even shared intimate things about ourselves. None of it bothered me. I would be her friend if it didn't piss him off so much. She probably would have come to dinner with my girlfriends and me, if she hadn't already had other plans.

I think my biggest curiosity about the whole thing in the beginning of the relationship is "what does she look like?" After getting over that, I want to know about their personality type and how my partner dealt with them in a crisis. And of course, it is so important for me to find out why they didn't last.

Clearly, I liked her. She said she wished she had taken on my approach when she was dating him. I told him if I could, I would interview all of his ex girlfriends and write a guide. Maybe I will create a group of facebook. I can be the administrator. Wouldn't that be fun?

Best of 2009; Postings

2010-01-03T14:03:00.011-06:00

I am finally full of ideas to blog about. I said in my last blog that I would review my favorite ones from 2009, so here goes.

I feel compelled to refer to the postings that were featured on Brazencareerist. Those are the ones where my fellow blogging companions felt the need to bash or completely support my "Janieisms".

Starting with "Everyone Needs Good Therapy. As usual some of the blogging community blasted me. One blogger wrote, "I am reluctant to take the advice of anyone who labels themselves as an armchair psychologist simply due to the fact that it implies that he/she believes he/she knows the cause and cure to everyone else's problems. That kind of arrogance is rarely correct". I never defend myself with these comments. Nor do I take it personally at all. I still think everyone should try therapy out. I have noticed a significant difference in people (myself included) who have been in therapy. Ok, so maybe not everyone needs therapy. Almost everyone.

"A Definition of My Generation" was also featured on Brazen and I think upset some of my peers. My favorite comment was the one where the author, referring to a photo of me with the back pack asked "Where's all the back packing taking place, by the way?" My point is just that our generation thinks we are so special while boasting about our intellect and sustainable lifestyle. Which is great. But not unique.

My Favorite 2009 Posting - the one where I actually received a few phone calls - was the "Dating is Complicated and Irony was Last Week's Theme". Sometimes I think it's not fair how hard I work on my relationships. As I walked over to the coffee shop to write this, I thought about how I exhaust my boyfriend with questions regarding his feelings. Around the clock. Day in and day out. I wish I could say more - really everything. But I am realizing that he is finally starting to read this. He the introvert. And me the extrovert.

He angers me and I tell him right then and there. I lay into him. All of my issues with him come pouring out, igniting a bomb. And then I storm out. Yes, dating is complicated. Since that posting, I ran into my "missed connections" a bunch of times. We spoke at length. There was a period where we were running into each other all of the time. I haven't seen him in months, though. I was just asked out at the airport. And while traveling. Each time, telling them that I am in a relationship. But each time, I still feel these men give me more credit than my boyfriend. So that has not changed.

Onwards. My favorite postings; ones where people slam me. Each one is a lesson learned.

Looking Back

2009-12-30T21:18:00.002-06:00

I know that I said at the beginning of 2009 that the new year is really no different than the year before. New Years Eve is any other night to me. But it does give us a way to separate periods in our lives. I am happy with my accomplishments and always will be. If I die now, I won't be disappointed with what I have done. I have a good life.

What I learned in 2009:

1) Americans love to blame people. It is classless and unsophisticated. Madison people are pretty good about not doing that. Here is an example:

"You gave him the wrong directions and he got lost!" - not classy (And very typical of the American culture)

Versus:

"He got lost" (We aren't blaming anyone here. See the difference?)

2) Family is so valuable.

It took me a while to get here. After years of living geographically close to my folks, I never took advantage of it. I didn't see them that often. At least I don't think I did. I didn't always talk to them that much, either. Living 500 miles away from them, I am now declaring "family time" with the local family and convincing my boyfriend to do the same. We are always having family time. And I am proud to say that my sisters are my best friends.

3) You don't always need to be near all forms of communication.

My boyfriend taught me to travel without my cell phone and without checking e-mail. I highly recommend it. I am now working on leaving my phone at home when I go out. I do not need to be reached all of the time. That's how it used to be, right?

4) Madison - Simply the Best

The best choice I ever made. Moving here.

Best books I read in 2009:

"The Help"

"The Girls from Aims"

"My Sister's Keeper"

"Everyman"

"The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime"

"Olive Kitteridge"

My next posting will feature my favorite blog postings from 2009.

Happy New Year!

Solo Travels to Montreal

2009-12-21T15:58:00.005-06:00

My trip to Montreal was a great experience. While looking forward to six days and five nights of vacation, some were doubtful that I would enjoy a vacation alone, but I did.

While staying down town, across the street from McGill University, my hotel was in a great location. I chose it based on the following: Good ratings on tripadvisor, I wanted a boutique hotel, I had a certain budget and I needed a workout room. (I didn't think outdoor running was going to work there).

After learning that the Bodies Exhibit was a few blocks from my hotel, I was excited to go. Somehow I missed it while it was in Cleveland but jumped at the chance to see it on vacation. Explore the interior and exterior of real preserved human bodies. Everything is exposed, including a room of unborn babies throughout the pregnancy. If you have the chance, I recommend the exhibition. These are real bodies. (beware)

The irony of that scientific exhibit had me thinking after I walked around McGill University and wandered into the Redpath Museum. Marine Vertebrates are on display as you enter the building. After looking at them, I thought how common it is for us to look at the skeletal systems of other mammals but not humans. Take the Field Museum, for example. There is an entire area dedicated to mammals that all look like (maybe they are) taxidermy. Walk into the bodies exhibit and you think how odd and eerie it is to look at a preserved, mortal human being.

I explored Old Montreal on my second day. Architecturally, this was my favorite area. It definitely has more of a "European" feel to it, although the french Canadians will tell you that Montreal does not look like Europe. The narrow, brick streets, cathedrals and tiny stores make it a cozy part of the area. I visited Notre Dame-de-Bon-Secours, one of the oldest churches in Montreal. Because the cathedral became a pilgrimage site for sailors, wooden ships are still hanging from the ceiling today.

I was late getting to the Beaux-Arts Museum. I didn't have as much time in there as I would have liked. Not until I moved to Madison have I enjoyed looking at furniture at art museums. (I am surrounded by a ton of furniture stores and live across the street from the Modern Art Museum). They had some fantastic modern furniture through the century. They also had a 1984 IBM computer on display!

St. Denis and Mt. Royal were my favorite streets to wander. There are a ton of fun local stores to browse around. I was able to find suitable gifts for my beloved sisters (my best friends).

Yes, Montreal is freezing this time of the year. My heart (which is no longer heavy) has been set on going there since 2006. My family visited there in 1985. I was ready to go back as an adult. I chose to move to a cold state from a cold state. And I can tolerate the cold weather. Finding a flight for under $500 from Wisconsin was another story.

Racing against the sunset at 4:10 every day, I would try to get as much of my outdoor walking out of the way as possible.

My favorite restaurants:
Le Cafe Vert (I believe that is the name)
Aux Printemps - Vegan, casual and pretty tasty.
Olive and Gourmando - Everything about this place was awesome. I went there for lunch and was seated at a community table. The food was fantastic, as was the decor.
Le Cagibi - A very, very casual place. Vegetarian. I went there for dinner, not knowing how casual it is. There are old couches, an old tin ceiling and hipsters all over their Macs. The food was delicious.

The above three places are all vegetarian friendly (if not exclusive). You know what you are eating and you can pronounce all of the words.

As a solo traveler, I would talk to the people around me, if I was in the mood. I did make friends with a Greek man who has lived in Montreal for seven years. He is trilingual. We went out for drinks one night. I found him to be very interesting and we spoke about our travels and he attempted to force me into speaking french. (They all told me that I have a cute french accent - that is credited to two authentic french teachers at Hathaway Brown School).

If you like to travel I do recommend you try a trip alone. I would do it again. But next time, I probably wouldn't go for as long.

A Bientot!

My Heavy Heart

2009-12-13T11:15:00.002-06:00

Sitting at the Memorial Union last Friday, eleven days ago, I looked around the cafeteria and thought about all of the students who will soon be leaving for vacation for a month, give or take. A lot of them looked international. "They must really miss each other, but somehow, they get by" I thought to myself. They make it through long periods of time without seeing each other. I can do it, too, I think. My boyfriend, sitting across from me says, "People are going to think we broke up!" I am sitting there crying. Today is the day he is leaving for sixteen days for his trip to India. And I am dreading the "good-bye."

How my feelings have changed as much as they have, I can't explain. If you look back to my rules, you will see that I think it is so important to avoid putting your friends on the back burner when you start dating. I cannot emphasize this enough. As I call myself a "serial dater," I was so very cautious about this relationship in the beginning because I wanted to create a life for myself in Madison that did not require a man at all times. I made a life outside of him. This means that I have a lot of friends. I have a lot of my own hobbies. I do not rely on him all of the time. But I have grown to really value us. And with all of these people in my life and things to do, I crave my alone time.

Three years ago, I decided that I wanted to go to India. When I met my boyfriend and mentioned that to him, he said he wanted to go there, too. He posts his annual goals on his blog. Something that I should do. His India trip was included on that list. (One of his 2008 goals was to, "Find a great girl to date" which he said he accomplished - he must be two timing). I was excited that I met someone who was interested in going there. But I am not ready. And I am glad I am not there, to be quite frank.

And the worst part of him going was saying "good-bye." Because I have my own life that occupies so much of my time. And although I miss him, I am so not dependent on him, that I am too busy to think about it a lot of the time. And you know what they say - "absence makes the heart grow fonder." This has been good for us.

Tomorrow, I am taking my own separate vacation to Montreal. This is my first solo trip and I am very excited. I am thrilled on the weekends when I can decide exactly what I am doing, without having to beg people to be flexible. This will be very enjoyable for me.

So, the lesson learned is to make sure you have established a life without your partner. It makes you more independent and happier in general. Studies have shown the importance and significance of having good friends.

Until then, have a great week. I am sure I will write about my trip upon my return.

Madison; Population What?

2009-12-06T22:12:00.002-06:00

How can it be that in a town of 225,000 people, everywhere I go is packed with people? I first pointed this out the first weekend of November. When we went to the last outdoor farmers market, the Environmental Film Festival and a pizza place all in one day - and every place was crowded. It was a beautiful day. And even though it was gorgeous weather ad everyone was outside, I couldn't believe how many people (like us) decided to spend an hour and a half indoors at a movie. The Festival was free - so that does explain a lot. (Everyone is happy to take advantage of free entertainment these days).

Since then - everywhere I go, I observe crowds of people. Plan B. Warren G. State Street. Barriques. The Coop (also known as the Willy Street Co-op). Breakfast places. Movies. Parks. My God, I went to the dog park, out in the country, and people were parking on the lawn, due to lack of parking. I went into Marigold for their Sunday breakfast (they recently started serving brunch on Sundays) and the line was out the door!

You would think that this wouldn't be the case in a gloomy recession.

Let me tell you about Plan B - not the birth control - Madison's latest night club. An LGSBT friendly dance club recently opened up on Willy Street. Positive reviews are circulating the neighborhood. It is one of the few "dance clubs" in town. After a lovely Christmas party, we ventured over there last night. We were an eclectic group, ourselves: Myself (a young, self proclaimed "agnostic" and the reason I do not blog about that is because it would upset one of my parents. Not my Dad) wearing the legging/mini skirt/ugg look, (picture little Jewish girl. Or coastie) My overachiever/workaholic/highly hilarious girlfriend (Think Miranda) Her boss - a wildly intelligent/fun loving/divorcee and our other girlfriend - a very Catholic/extremely conservative/red wine drinker. Here we are - age range is probably 47-29 and we had a BLAST. We danced the night away and the place, well it was packed.

The commerce is something to be desired by many other cities. I could imagine many other places are itching for the business that is done in this small town. You do have to figure that some of these populated areas include college students, post docs and the like, not counting as residents.

And why haven't I been blogging more? I am getting stuck in crowds of people attempting to do my holiday shopping. Which isn't working at all. So I decided to take it to cyber space. Which takes as much time. Because you have to read all of the reviews.

Goal for 2010: Take the blog to the next level!

Next Posting: A sad good-bye I had on Friday December, 4th.

Scout and Me

2009-11-24T21:19:00.004-06:00

This post is way overdue. In an attempt to blog more frequently, I think it is time to discuss my dog. If I was a columnist, I would probably write about my dog as much as John Grogan did with Marley. It isn't always easy to think of something to write about all of the time. To avoid becoming one of those "dog freaks" who obsesses over talking about their precious pooch, I have tried to stay away from the discussion of her in general. I know I mention from time to time that she exists, but that is the extent of it.

I got Scout when she was eight weeks old. I picked her out when she was four weeks. She is a golden retriever from Ohio. Her first year started in a "sorority house" in Wooster, Ohio, where I attended school. I was a senior. She became very popular on campus. Most students knew her. Some students knew her name, but not mine. It was fun. And it was very fun for Scout.

We moved to Boston before Scout's first birthday. She used to run with me in the mornings. Her first injury was a running injury when she stepped on some glass and had to have her paw bandaged.

I met my Boston boyfriend shortly after moving to Boston through Scout. She took to his dog at the park. We got together for a play date. (For the dogs, people).

On another note, I will tell you that since I have had Scout, I have never been in better shape. You know what they say about the statistics of dog owners. We are healthier.

Scout has eaten everything in sight, including the following items: (I am debating how inappropriate to get here)

-Christmas ornaments
-the wall
-the tile floor
-a wood chair
-shoes
-bags and bags of chocolate
-gourds
-some forms of birth control
-a contact lens case
-sunglasses
-most of the pockets out of my fleeces
-the treat pocket out of my Patagonia hiking bag
-all trash that is available to her
-lollipops with the sticks on
-any snacks in a Ziploc, including the Ziploc, itself
-a bag of flour
-a frozen, dead muskrat
-a frozen, dead rabbit
-a blue jay that couldn't fly away
-many, many, many dead deer
(Ok, enough of the dead animals - you get the hint).
this list could go on and on, but then I would never finish this blog.

Most people tell me that my golden retriever is the hungriest golden they have ever seen. Which could be true. A few years ago, she gained some weight and I put her on a diet of 1/2 green beans, 1/2 food. She slimmed down and then some. By the time we moved to Madison and her exercise level increased, the vet told me, "I rarely tell people this, but she needs to gain weight!" I doubled her food. Yesterday, at Scout's annual physical, she is overweight, once again. I cut back her food back to her old diet. Oh well.

Scout and I lived in Boston for two years. There was a park she and I really enjoyed there. In 2004, we moved to Cleveland for four years. I never found a good park for her there. But there were places to take her, no doubt. During that time, she developed a "Bel's palsy." One day, her face looked crooked. I was shaken up and I thought she had had a stroke. The vet took her immediately and said that they have seen this before. Ever since, she has a slight facial paralysis in the left side of her face. They told me it was probably viral. She was so beautiful. Such a stunning dog. She is still pretty. But it's not the same. It doesn't seem to bother her, though. It's sad for me to write this part.

In 2008, we moved to Madison. Scout was then seven. Shortly after we moved here, she was running through some backyards, where she liked to invade all of the composts and she broke her tooth on something. It cost me over $700.00 to have her diagnosed and have the tooth pulled. After she woke up from her surgery, she was the most tired I have ever seen her. The staff who worked on her just loved her. Every vet (all six!) has told me that she is such a sweet dog.

Scout had her annual physical yesterday. My vet evaluated her on a form. With her distemper, they added an "other" box and wrote "super sweet." I am proud that she is sweet, but she will never be the best behaved dog. She likes to eat way too much. She is now a senior. I have noticed some arthritis in her hind legs. She still goes to the park about four days a week. Sometimes, she just sits down and waits for someone to pet her. My park mates love her when it is cold because she is a "feet warmer." She has a slight heart murmur, a gray & crooked face and an "old lady" small wort on her face. Other than that, she is doing well. Oh yeah - she drinks a ton of water. It's so strange. She slurps quite loudly and drips all over the place. It drives my boyfriend (he is very clean) nuts.

I can't imagine life without my girl, Scout. I just try not to think about it. Ever. Because when that day comes, I will probably require lots of sympathy and a week off to grieve. But the vet tells me that it's a long time from now.

And if you are sad reading this, then don't see or read "Marley and Me." And if you are sad reading this, then you probably have a dog (or pet). Otherwise, it's hard to relate to this.

Scout has given me so much. I have a ton of friends I have met through our dog park trips. There is a great community of dog people here. I have become a real "outdoors woman" because of her.

She's a goofy dog. That is for sure. But, when it really comes down to it - it's just the two of us.

Tradition

2009-11-23T22:41:00.003-06:00

Another night of laziness. I'm afraid I have become quite delinquent in posting. And yet again am not in the mood for a Madison endorsement. A year ago, I was getting myself into a "not so serious" relationship, planning to keep it as casual as possible. In fact, one year ago, November 2008, I was trying to figure out how to end it. Coincidentally, we were in Chicago for the Festival of Lights (we did not know that event was taking place that weekend) and we enjoyed it. After doing it twice, it's a tradition, correct?

In 2008, en route from Chicago back to Madison, (I was reminded by some friends and my boyfriend, himself), that I was hoping to wrap things up with him. Come 2009, and we are making this trip an annual occurrence. Obviously, I didn't end it.

My fearfulness and skepticism of relationships stems from a variety of things. The main being statistics. And I think if you do not have an agenda involving children, then you can put the brakes on.

I met with my financial advisor today. He asked me about my goals, of course. For the first time, I felt that I admitted out loud where I see myself in three years. If you know me, then you wouldn't be surprised with what I said. But this got me thinking quite a bit. And I am sure that I will be there in three years.

But for those who delve into the "seal the deal" game of mating, I just can't relate. Still not afraid of turning thirty without a ring or a baby is perfectly fine with me. What I will have is my pride. And all of this damn gray hair.

And I have grown so much since a year ago, when I was trying so hard to not like my boyfriend. Because I obviously like him a lot. And so do all of my female cousins. Which probably makes me like him even more.

En route from Chicago back to Madison after our "new tradition," I wasn't contemplating the end of us. I was looking forward to spending the rest of the day with him.

How Did I Get Here?

2009-11-15T21:55:00.004-06:00

I can't do it tonight. I cannot blog about something where I have to link sites and data. And I don't always do that. Sometimes I feel the necessity to continue to endorse Madison, but I am feeling too lazy to repeat everything I have said starting seven days ago about how Madison seems so highly populated, even though it isn't. I will save that for my next post.

Most of my postings require a lot of my thoughts as they come to me. On average, none of them take more than one hour. And I enjoy writing very much. I think it is funny when people send me e-mails regarding the posts and tell me to "publish it on my blog" - I guess they don't realize that is what the comments section is for. There is so much more I could do here to market it. Some day I will.

Some of my endorsements have been published in other sites. But, I know my friends love the more personal stories. So it's a real balance at this point.

So why don't I just tell you how I got here and where I am now. At this moment in my twenty nine years.

In 1998, at my private, prestigious, nationally recognized high school (no linking, remember, too lazy), we were asked to fill out a questionnaire that would be read to us at our 25th. I am guessing I am the only one who remembers that we did that. Or what I wrote on it. For example, I remember that I said I would have four kids, married to a much older man, be a real estate agent and an aerobics instructor. How lame is that? And how unsophisticated of a lifestyle, perhaps?

Anyways - I was already a real estate agent, so I can check that off of my list. I have taken aerobics. I dated a much older man. And I don't know what I was thinking regarding the four kids. I would consider four dogs, maybe.

At my twenty-fifth reunion, I can't really guarantee anything, can I? Except that I will remember everything that I wrote on that questionnaire. And I am guessing I will still live here, although who the hell really knows the answer to anything?

I feel like I have had nine lives. Each one of them gets better. On the weekends, I always think that I have a good life. I have a cozy little home. My family is totally normal. Even if we are divorced. I think my boyfriend is hot. Even if we may divorce. I have great friends. I have learned so much. I am dedicated to running. And my work. And my dog. And I have an easy lifestyle that I chose.

And I can't believe what I did. My boyfriend and I were going to our first "gourmet cooking club" dinner the other night, and this thought came through my head of "I have this whole social life and I just up and moved here sixteen months ago. How crazy was I???!! What was I thinking?!" I can tell you this: I don't think I could ever do it again. And when everyone told me how brave I was, I would think they were the crazy ones. I am just realizing how crazy I was. That sounds like a very scary thing. Breaking up/moving 500 miles/leaving your job - alone - all at the same time.

I am proud of myself. And I am aware of this now. I hope to go to my 25th reunion. But who knows where I will be then?

End of Fall (?) in Madison

2009-11-08T08:58:00.004-06:00

For all of the critics who complain about the long winter in Madison, I will say this: As someone who prefers running outside versus inside, I have been doing outdoor running for the past eight months (since March 9, to be exact). So, I ask you how is it possible that we have "winter for six months" when I have been running, for eight months, outside? With no snow. I think in the past eight months, I may have run on a treadmill five times. Two of those times were in hotels. The other three were probably due to inclement weather. I can easily track our weather, since I know my morning routine, as it applies to the state of the Madison atmosphere.

I have said to many people that I am excited for the first big snowfall. It is still exciting. Even as an adult.

And although I experienced the last "outdoor" farmers market of the season, (sad), I am excited for the winter. Yesterday, as we walked around the final outdoor market, I would estimate that most people were not wearing jackets. The sky was cloudless and the temperature was probably already 60 degrees. It was beautiful. Tables were outside at my favorite brunch place.

Being accused of a "delinquent blogger," by one of my sisters (I only have two), I am overdue for this. I hate the "I am so busy" excuse. Always have. Since labor day weekend, I have been booked, up until this current weekend - November 6th through the 8th.

What is going on? Three weekends, I had work related events. Two weekends, I had weddings out of town. Two weekends, I had family visiting here from out of state. And in the next two weekends, I have a large work event, then a weekend trip, then most of my family is coming here for Thanksgiving, then I leave for my vacation. So, if you want to try to make some plans with me on the weekend, we are looking at the weekend after Christmas. Which is why I STILL have not been back to Cleveland, Ohio since I moved here.

Having nothing on my agenda this weekend has felt incredibly strange. I certainly don't want to take any spontaneous day trips. My boyfriend and I took advantage of the free film festival on campus and saw "Ghost Bird." (Some of my friends were distributing materials at the farmer's market, marketing the free film festival. One, in a carrot suit.)

Although I am not a birder, I must admit that the movie was very interesting. I hesitated to go with him, but thought it would be a good experience. In 2005, the "thought to be extinct" Ivory Billed Woodpecker was spotted in a very small town in Arkansas. What it did for this town, alone, economically enhanced it. Think "the middle of nowhere." Suddenly, all of these people are flocking there, with the hopes of a sighting.

The usual happens: Freaking politics, every time. Yes, you guessed it - the government got involved. They make the formal announcement that they have validated the sighting. And the most frustrating thing happens. The search team gets federal funding to continue this highly expensive and potentially useless exploration!

Why is it useless? You may have guessed it again. Ornithologists start to think that this discovery may have not been the "possibly extinct" ivory bill, but its look alike, the pileated woodpecker.

The story tells the controversy of the "who spotted Elvis" tail (that was a pun) on the ivory bill woodpecker, government, and the scientists (mainly ornithologists) who support the sighting and the skeptics who don't.

I wish I could feel so much passion towards birding. I can't relate to it at all. Like I can't relate to looking forward to a Packers game. And one Ornithologist, when describing his hopes of spotting one of these birds, admitted, somewhat modestly, that he has "wept" when listening to other people's sightings of this rare bird. I just can't relate. As much as I would love to have that enormous sense of emotion about such a small piece of life.

In other doings around town, as the fall carries on - I highly recommend the Coen brother's latest, "A Serious Man." They are so incredibly creative. They did it again. A movie that makes you think and discuss a lot afterwards. So many loose ends.

I was introduced to another hiking trail in Middleton. Pheasant Branch is a family friendly preservation that I am pretty sure is featured in a picture in "Money Magazine." The article is in their annual "best places to live" issue from this past summer. As Madison's famous blogger, Penelope Trunk tweeted, regarding Middleton's rating: (It is rated four out of one hundred!)

"Untold truth: No foreign cars, no foreign films, and lox is a foreign word."

As I said, I am staying in Madison proper. But as my boyfriend says (and doesn't follow), "live and let live."

My state pass was well used this season. I finally selected my favorite bars down town. Dined at the new Porta Alba location. Known for their stone oven pizza, (the oven was built from lava stone,) my boyfriend thinks they have one of the best pizzas in town. I had the Gorgonzola gnocchi, which was pretty good. Although, the portion was small. I didn't finish it, but it is unusual that I ever finish anything I order from a restaurant. And I think the price is right. Attended a couple of concerts. The music scene is pretty good in this small town.

And when the snow falls, I can finally convince myself that is ok to stay inside for a few hours. Until then - I am heading out.

My Demotion (In the Familial status)

2009-10-26T19:33:00.003-05:00

Just recently, I somehow went from being at the adult table for ten plus years to the "kids table" in a matter of months. Which is fine by me. You know, you wait all of those years to sit with the older kids. The "cool" kids, And then you finally get there. And you hang out with them at every funeral, wedding and holiday. And then suddenly, I am looking around the little table. And I am sitting across from a twelve year old. A seventh grader. "How did I get here?" I ask myself.

I'll tell you how I got there. I went from dating a guy nearly twenty years my senior to dating someone my age. That's all that happened. It's plain and simple, you see. And it works because I can act like a young twenty-something year old if I have to. Like while the speech was being given, I pretended to eat the Indian Corn centerpiece - typewriter style. You really can't do that with a man in his forties and three other couples all mid-forties surrounding you.

And then texting friends and pretending to take photos of all of the tables so you can really get a current picture of your friend's ex boyfriend with assistance from your table mates probably wouldn't work with a bunch of forty somethings either. So this hanging out with the kids table business worked out pretty well.

At the last wedding, while hanging out with the kids table, I continued to rub it in their face. How I remember when they were born. And when they learned how to talk. Until they all reminded me that I tell them that every time. Then proceeded to tell me how they never got to go out with me before. Until my family demotion.

And if you're thinking about being demoted, I highly recommend it. My old table mates are now exhausted with diapers and rug rats with runny noses. And they don't know the words to the songs we are dancing to. They don't know about the Hotel Motel Holiday Inn. And my new table mates - we are planning where we are going next while the old table mates are already in dreamland.

I am loving my demotion. I am looking forward to sitting at the kids table at our next event.

The Dreary Suburbs

2009-10-20T21:14:00.002-05:00

The other day, I was reading an article in "The New Yorker" - (it was the fiction one. And no, I am not that smart - someone left it at my house....) and it brought something to my attention that I often think about but rarely address: the suburbs. Obviously, every city is different, but in my agnostic/hipster/liberal surroundings, this movement thinks of the suburbs as dreary and uncool. As stated in the article, these anti-suburban folks decided that the 'burbs are a place to joke about and not a place to aspire to."

Clearly, I live down town. So do all of my closest friends. If I choose to "settle down" I wouldn't stay down town. I don't want to have to take an elevator to lug everything, including a stroller. And the trend here does seem to be to choose a neighborhood when it's "time."

But, there is something so very different about the "burbs" in Madison. The area just east of me is a melting pot along the lake. Known for being "diverse," it is not diverse in the sense that you are thinking of. It is diverse such as there are gays/straights/young/old/grad students/professors. As far as I can see, the only ethnicity over there are the adopted children by single sex parents. Maybe it is a suburb, but it is still Madison proper and there is nothing about it that appears to be like Wisteria Lane.

Now, where my cousins were raised and where my sister and brother-in-law live - that is also Madison proper. Although it has sidewalks and friendly neighbors, it still doesn't remind me of "Desperate Housewives" in any way. You can walk to bars/restaurants/coffee shops, as you pretty much can in any of the Madison proper "suburbs." So, in my mind, there is nothing nerdy or uncool about a suburb here.

I think my problem would be which one to choose. As I have run through a considerable amount of the suburbs in Madison, they are all beautiful and seem to be holding their value, as far as real estate is concerned. With everything so accessible, I suppose you would have to boil it down to the school systems which I know very little about.

Thank You for Not Smoking (Winston)

2009-10-13T20:43:00.004-05:00

I was briefly reunited with my college friends this past weekend. We always do the same thing when we are together: reminisce, drink (probably too much), and share hotel rooms that inevitably look trashed by the next morning with pizza boxes, newly opened bottles of wine/beer and cigarette packs.

Because I had arisen at the crack of 5:00 AM the first evening together, I was informed that good gossip and serious boozing was five feet away from me as I dozed. This doesn't mean that I wasn't any fun. Because prior to hitting the hotel suite, we were at a bar on the water. And when I hear good dance music, I dance. Even if nobody else is out there on the floor yet. So, in my mind, I got the floor going. (Maybe if I was alone for a little, while my friends cracked up, watching through the window).

And after the rehearsal dinner, while friends had a puff of a cigarette, I finally caved and bummed one. "Why are you smoking, with all that running you do?" my friend asked me. (We had already agreed to go for a nice long run in the morning). Now here is a long distance runner/ex smoker asking another long distance runner/ex smoker. "I don't know. It's something to do, I guess," I told her. Of course in college, we all smoked. And I swore I would quit when I graduated. And I did.

Here is the story. Graduation day came along, and by noon, I was dying. I always needed a smoke in the morning. "Forget it," I said to my friend/co-quitter. We were driving twelve hours the next day to move out to Boston. If you smoke, then you know that long drives consist of a ton of puffing out the window. The plan was postponed. "When we get there, we'll quit," we agreed.

I went maybe one more week before I got sick. I felt exhausted. Completely beat. Then I found an itchy rash on my side. "Shingles," the doctor said. I went home and lounged on the couch, watching "20/20." Barbara Walters was interviewing Carol Burnett, whose daughter, Carrie, had just passed away from lung cancer. Burnett told Walters that before Carrie died, she said she was sorry to Carol. She apologized that she had smoked. That night, I had a dream about my lung. That it had a black hole in it. And I was done. For good.

Not even a year later, I went to see my Grandma, four hours away in New York. Her lung had "gook" on it and she was in the hospital. She was almost 90 years old. "Nana, how many years did you smoke?," I asked her. She thought about it and then said something incredulous like sixty years. I assumed she had lung cancer, but nobody seemed concerned. My dad called me the next day to tell me she had lung cancer. "I knew it," I said.

Then I was really done. The few times I smoked after that, I found it gross. I hated it. And then I moved to Madison and met my boyfriend. He had a similar story - smoked a lot in college and quit after. Then I discovered he would occasionally smoke socially here and there. Don't all hipsters? Next thing you know, I am bumming here and there.

Then we are back to this weekend, where my long distance runner/ex smoking friend is asking her long distance runner/ex smoking friend (me) why she is smoking. And I tell her "it's something to do." Bad answer.

After a nice run together the next morning, I ask her what her take is on smoking. She is getting her Masters in Public Health. She says, "You take a piece of paper. You put leaves in it. Then you smoke poison." Ok - enough said. I am done. And when everyone is smoking that night at the wedding, I refuse. Remembering, "Smoking poison."

And years ago, I went through an entire carton in one week. Sick. It's time to stop the smoking, kids.

Mornings in Madison

2009-10-01T17:52:00.003-05:00

Madison tends to start work early and leave early. Everyone seems to wrap-up their day around 4:30 or 5:00. After-work happy hours tend to go from 5-7:00 PM. And everyone seems to be a morning person.

If I told you a year ago what I now do in a morning, I wouldn't believe myself. You can have a whole morning before you even go to work. As one of the healthier cities in the United States, I can understand why there is quite a morning crowd. A ton of people are out exercising (myself included) prior to work. I see a lot of the same characters in the morning. The older man who jogs in his Wisconsin hoodie. The guy who always says "hi" on his roller blades. The 50+ lady in her professional looking running clothes who has the body of an eighteen year old. One morning, I even passed up my good friend as I was running along Lake Monona. And we were probably both out the night before, tossing back a few beers. But this is a dedicated group.

Move on to what happens upon my return. I cannot believe that I tend to throw in a load of laundry before work, as well. So that it can go in the dryer post-work, while my dog and I are at the dog park. (I don't EVER leave my dryer on when my dog is home alone). Some mornings, I also vacuum. (There's a ton of shedding going on here).

And then, of course - the dog has to go for a quick walk before I leave. Sometimes, I run into friendly neighbors and we get into a little chat. And before I know it, I am really late for my next part of the morning routine: coffee shop.

The brewing at home didn't last long. I missed Barriques, so we have been completely reunited. Because it is a familiar stomping ground, I can safely say that all of the regulars know each other's names. It is quite friendly. And if I have a lot of time, I will walk over there with my dog and hang out outside for five or ten minutes. One time, I even left the dog with a very nice coffee companion, who watched her while I ran in to get something to eat. She hung out with a group of regulars and relaxed under the table.

So here I am, now. This morning person. Who would have thought? And by 8:15, I am always happy I have so much done already. And I wonder why I am so tired right now?

Gen Y and Phone Etiquette.

2009-09-27T16:43:00.004-05:00

Still unsure if I am Y. A while ago, I did write a post on texting. It is the thing to do. But I must say, there are certainly other rules that come with Gen Y that are so clear to me.

As I suppose I am on the cusp of Gen Y, I know for sure that my little cousins are Gen Yers. And I know their routines. I do not take it personally when I call them and leave them a message and I never hear back from them. Ever. And I also don't care if they tell me they never listened to my message. Because I stopped leaving messages.

Once I started hanging out with massive amounts of people who are my age and younger (this happened when I moved here), I saw the real deal. For those parents who are still upset when the little niece doesn't call you back, let me jot down their protocol:

-They don't like talking on the phone - they prefer a text.
-They will not listen to your message. They see you called and they will call you back.
-They expect you to do the same.

How many times have I called someone back and said "I never listened to your message. What what was it?" Then I listen to it three weeks later when my phone alerts me that they will delete the message and it is some random message from a family member, telling me about some long boring thing that I don't care about. Notice that I haven't mentioned anything about my friends. Because they don't leave me messages. And in one a year, my boyfriend has left me his first voicemail two weeks ago. To notify me that he saw my dog was on the news. (She was not arrested for shop lifting at the pet store. I actually pay for everything she eats as she devours everything she passes).

I must admit that I am quite the hypocrite. Because I used to have this strict rule that if you called me and you didn't leave me a message, I refused to call you back. This stemmed from dialing a wrong number where the recipient called me back. I called about a car for sale. I dialed the wrong number. I realized it immediately, so I did not leave a message. The guy calls me back. He wants to know why I called him. The conversation went like this:

Wrong Number Guy: "Someone from this number just called me."

Me: "Did they leave you a message?"

Wrong Number Guy: "No, but I am calling back."

Me: "Well, I realized I dialed the wrong number after it was ringing, so I didn't leave a message. Don't you think if the person wanted you to call them back, they would have left a message?"

Wrong Number Guy: "Yeah, probably."

Me: "Ok. Bye."

And I am thinking to myself - this guy is a moron. But he was probably just being curious, right? This has happened about three times to me. So I used to say if you didn't leave me a message, I would not call you back. Now, if I see you have called me, that is the message enough. What is the message going to be, anyway? "Call me back?" The missed call says it all. If you want to notify me of anything more than that, text me.

The rules are simple and I changed.

My Favorite Recipe

2009-09-17T21:49:00.002-05:00

In the spirit of my favorite season, I love to make my famous "Soup in a Pumpkin." We are coming into my absolute favorite time of year. As soon as I see the pumpkins are out, I make my soup. It is a lot of work, but really fun for everyone. I only make it twice in the fall. And since I already made it once, you will have to fight for your chance to taste it in 2009....

A farmer on Saturday was selling all of his pumpkins for $1.00! Well, being that it was not even mid September when I saw that bargain, I told him I would take a few. I told him:

"I make a soup in the pumpkin,"
The farmer said, "I have heard of people doing it."
I said, "It's a lot of work."
The Farmer said "I heard that, too!"

Then I took a photo of his truck as he was loading it up.

Here is the recipe:

(I buy small individual ones, depending on how many people I am making it for) 6 pounds Pumpkin
1 1/2 cups Bread crumbs, fresh dried- I usually take fresh bread and break into pieces, bake at 350 for 15 mins. Then you have homemade bread crumbs!
2 cups Onions; chopped
1/2 cup Butter
1 1/2 cup Cheese,
mozzarella or Swiss, grated
2 quarts Vegetable stock
Salt & pepper1/2 teaspoon Sage (or more)
1 cup Cream, heavy OR1 cup Half and Half - (I leave this out a lot!)

Crush bread crumbs. Saute onions in butter until soft but not browned. Stir crumbs into the hot onion mixture and cook slowly for 3 minutes. Cut a top off pumpkin, scoop out seeds, rub inside with soft butter. Turn the crumb mix into the pumpkin. Stir in grated mozzarella or Swiss cheese and fill to within 2 inches of top with hot vegetable stock (about 2 qt). Season with salt, pepper and sage. Bake on a pizza pan in preheated 400 degree oven for about 1 1/2 hours or until pumpkin flesh can be flaked off with large cooking fork. Do not overcook as pumpkin will collapse. Keep warm until ready to serve. Just before serving, gently stir in hot cream or half and half, and a handful of chopped fresh parsley (optional). Serve everyone their individual pumpkin. Scrape the flesh into your soup and enjoy!

Great with red wine and a salad. This is all you need. It is VERY filling! This is a wonderful fall meal.

Top Five Summer Madison Activties

2009-09-09T20:35:00.006-05:00

For such a small city, (Madison has under 225,000 residents), I was completely overwhelmed this summer with activities, festivals, concerts and other venues that were offered on a daily basis in Madison, Wisconsin. This is by no means a complaint, yet reassures me that I have made a good decision in choosing this place.

After work, with energy still looming, I would have to decide whether I should do the laundry and household work that needed to be tended to or skip it all together for a trip to a hiking trail or a weekday farmer's market or a seat at the Union, overlooking Lake Mendota. And the list goes on. I am practically thankful that the sun is setting earlier because it is an excuse to sit on the couch and read.

I cannot even allow myself to sit on the couch when the sun is out. I have to enjoy nature. And with the infinite options around town, I have made every excuse (art show - friend wants to meet for a drink outside - dog needs to exercise on park trail - the swimming pool is open) to avoid doing anything that is taxing, like finishing my taxes, for example.

Where to start? Of all of the things you can do, I will rate my top five memories of "All things offered in Madison....."

1) The Farmer's Market

Well, it is quite obvious that I love the farmer's market. I never buy a whole lot, but I am only one person. Besides the main market which is the biggest "producer only" market in the entire country, there are smaller sized markets all week in outlying neighborhoods. For example, Central Park, aka the "Eastside Market," takes place on Tuesday afternoons. I can tell you that since I went to the Saturday market, almost every dinner has come from something purchased there.

2. Venetian Night

An inaugural event in town. After the annual "Taste of Madison," (I went. Only because it is literally my back yard. One loop around the square and it was not that impressive), the first ever boat parade on Lake Mendota. Boats were illuminated with fun lights and paraded from one end of the lake in Maple Bluff, ending by the UW Union. There were so many incredible places to take a seat and wait for this event to start. There were a number of parks along the lake. (Whoever plotted the area surrounding the lakes did a fantastic job). It was a gorgeous night and the event was a success.

3) Restaurant Week

A bi-annual occurrence. Many local restaurants participate in this. Two for $50 enables you to a three course meal. This summer, I chose Fresco, on top of the Overture Center. With a lovely view of State Street and the city, it's fun to dine on the roof. Our meals were tasty and consisted of mostly local ingredients. (Surprise!!)

4) Orton Park Festival

On the near east side of town, there are several festivals throughout the summer. Orton Park features Cycropia Aerial Dance Troupe. The festival is in a square of grass in a neighborhood that I often run through in the mornings. The Cycropia dancers are a troupe of "circque du soleil" artists, who performed by hanging on the branches of this one tree. It was very cool. A lot of the pieces involved swinging on what appeared to be large scarves and dainty swings. And I kept on thinking to myself, "I run by this tree in the mornings. I wonder if God intended for this tree to be utilized this way....?" Awesome show!

5) Marquette Waterfront Festival

Also a near east side festival, what I enjoyed about this one was the melting pot. I went there in the afternoon to hear a reggae type of band. They were very talented and as I danced up by the stage, little kids were dancing. So were old hippies who probably went to UW with my parents. And hippies younger than me. Gays. Straights. Biracial families. Old. Young. Mentally handicapped. You name it. We were all blending together, dancing to that reggae in the June summer sun. All in the name of Saturday afternoon.

I also loved Maxwell Street Days - State Street's sidewalk sale, Jazz off the square, Concerts on the Square, the Art Fair on the Square, and many many more.... There is just so much.

What I have learned this summer in Madison is that I would never take a vacation from it. I would miss way too much.

Put Yourself Out There

2009-09-01T22:00:00.002-05:00

This week, I have been asked by three or four different people how I met my current boyfriend. Have you ever noticed that people get very giddy telling that story? Ask someone today. They will have this big smile on their face as they relive the tale. I can tell you a ton of people I know still smile cheek-to-cheek when asked to retell the moment they met their significant other. (Unless they have been married for 25 years. In which case, there is no grinning at all).

And I realized that I have always had a good story to share when asked this question. It was never a dull, "We met at a bar" or.... "we met on match.com..." Not that there is anything wrong with these things. Because there isn't. I have a knack for putting myself out there and I think it has something to do with my ability to talk to absolutely anyone.

Take my first long relationship after I graduated college. We met at the dog park. We continued to run into each other there on the weekends and finally exchanged information. I wasn't going to the dog park to find a man. But I was putting myself out there, regardless. As I would wherever I went (including the grocery or running path - no joke). I just always kept my eyes open.

My current situation is similar. Sort of. After meeting on King Street, we ran into each other two more times that week. After exchanging numbers, we got together a few days later. Was I putting myself out there on King Street? No, actually. But I wasn't acting like I was unavailable, either. Or that I was committed to someone else. Or that I was not interested in men. I don't know what vibe I gave off. Because truthfully, he told me that we danced and I got "real low on the dance floor" with him and he tried to talk to me and I was "a mute." I have absolutely no recollection of either a) dancing with him OR b) him trying to talk with me. He is the "mute" and I never stop flapping my gums. I remember that the night was wild and I was newly single and free - not interested in anyone, really. Just letting whoever came my way know that I was, in fact, single.

So - this vibe of being "available" comes off. And he said he wasn't interested in me. And I wasn't interested in him. But somehow, I was letting him know I was putting myself out there. This is easy.

None of this came easy to me before. I have progressed a lot in this category. And a year ago, I started writing this book on how to date an ass hole. And then I stopped taking my own advice and ended up in this relationship after swearing off committed relationships.

I have even taken friends out, saying, "let me get you a man..." or, "I'll take care of your dry spell for you."

I have never had to get fixed up because I am always fixing myself up. Or, I am fixing up everyone around me. I love to match make. So, put yourself out there and let people know you are on the "hunt." Wherever you go, seek out a person. Find out their history. Are they single? If so, why? (This is very, very important. I have recently had to do my own personal investigation because my boyfriend was being too private for my liking. He is not very happy that my "new" friend, who lives with his ex girlfriend, invited me to his birthday dinner last week.........) On another note, always look and feel good about yourself. You can't feel good if you feel like you don't look good. Even when I go across the street for a bottle of wine, I try to dress nicely so I can carry myself with dignity.

After all, you never know where that special someone is. Whether they are in the line at the movies or a hiking trail, your future relationship may be right in front of you tomorrow. Always be prepared and let them know you are available. And don't give up. They are out there.

The Wooster Camaraderie

2009-08-23T16:01:00.005-05:00

Well, I moved. And now I don't have wireless for a while. Which has been really nice. Mainly because I can't do anything that requires the internet, so I have enjoyed it, as I am a little addicted to the internet. And because of the move and lack of wireless, I have not blogged. And I won't have it for a few more days. It's strange because I only moved up two floors and I was always able to access other wireless connections. Oh well. I have been doing other things to pass the time. Like going out to dinner with a stranger I met.

Well, not really a stranger. Outside of my office the other day, a car was parked with a "College of Wooster Alumni" sticker, which I also happen to have on my car. For those not familiar with Wooster, (not pronounced like "Rooster"), it is a small, liberal arts college in a town called Wooster, Ohio. Most people I know haven't heard of it. When I attended, it had a college attendance of 1700. Well known for it's Independent Study program, mainly a year-long thesis that is then defended to a team of professors and also famous for its' bagpipers, Wooster was recently featured in a cover story in a "New York Times" article about colleges that are creatively cutting costs. And boy, was I proud of my alma mater!

Besides my graduate school pals and such, most people I know did not spend Sundays in a cubicle in the college library, madly doing research for their senior thesis. And I thoroughly enjoyed it. And yes, my little thesis title is still on the bottom of my resume.

Now, this car in front of my office. I ran out to put a note on the windshield with my contact information. As I ran back outside, the driver was getting in. After exchanging some information about where we are from and why we are in Madison, I told this young woman I would help her find a job and gave her my e-mail address.

We had dinner the other night. She is engaged to her College of Wooster sweetheart. Did I think for maybe one minute to invite my sweetheart? No. Not really. After learning the hard way that you do not include people who are not affiliated with the College of Wooster, I was not about to bring along my boyfriend who I hadn't seen in days.

Wooster has something about it that non-attendees just don't get. There is that "Wooster Camaraderie" thing going on. Completely segregated from the "townies," it's A "bubble" of its' own. And if you didn't experience it, you won't get it. And you will feel completely left out.

Eight years out and I still have a special place for Wooster in my heart. Meeting with this Wooster couple, two recent grads, we spent an hour and a half discussing dorms, the dining hall, parents weekend, building myths and structures, Stan Hales and more.

What is it about this college that makes it so special? I don't know. It's just special. I wish I could explain it to you. We all experienced the beauty of the campus, the distinguished buildings, the "there's nothing to do" binge drinking, the random restaurant selections, the drive-through liquor stores, the UG, Georgia at Lowry, Short order, Mom's Truckstop, Java Hut, naked runs through the snow, filling Kauke Arch, "The Voice," and more. A real bond.

And it's mine. It is my connection. They are my memories. And it reminds me a lot of my life now. The memories I am making with my friends in this small, compact city. Except this time, I am not the student in the bubble. I went to a bar for one beer last night, and it was filling up with the returning college students. "Are we townies," I asked my friend. "Yes, we are." he said....